An Unexpected Disappearance

    Jane was never one to dwell on her feelings or seek help for feeling down or upset. Lately she could not seem to “fix” feeling like her life was meaningless, mundane, and just plain boring. She wondered if it was just her age and the fact that she had been doing the same job for twenty years at the same office working for the same boss. As an advertising executive she was somehow losing her edge, not because she wasn’t creative any longer but because there was a younger generation in the office, and her boss gave them the interesting and challenging accounts. Jane wasn’t yet old enough to retire but she feared the perception her boss had was that she was riding it out until retirement. Jane avoided addressing the issue.

   Jane continued to go through the motions. Get up, shower, dress, have a cup of coffee while she was getting ready and then off to the boring four walls of her office.

   Jane and Jerry had been married for thirty years, raised two children, and had what looked like to the outside world a very normal life. Jane was happy with her family although it had changed when her kids had grown, married and both moved out of state. She was glad that they were happy and doing well with their own families, yet Jane yearned for the past when things were simpler, and her kids were around to participate in family events.

    Jerry was getting ready to retire in his career but was still working on “Jerry” time. He had earned lots of time off and could fenagle his schedule more than Jane. Jerry had sensed that Jane was going through “something” but was never comfortable talking about feelings. He knew his wife and she seemed unsettled lately.

    " How about we head out to the beach Friday? I think you could use some salt air and walks on the beach.”

    Jane shook her head in agreement, but deep down she didn’t think a trip to the beach was really what she needed. The thought of the same place they always stayed, the same beach, the same crab cake dinner at their favorite restaurant, it all pointed to the same mundane feeling she had at home. She did not have the heart to tell Jerry.

    “I think I should be able to skate out of the office early on Friday. I am only working on that ad campaign for Jersey Mike’s so it shouldn’t be a big deal to leave,” Jane said. If I go through the motions; it will boost my spirits Jane thought.

   The week went on and Jane found herself looking at other beaches to visit verses where they usually go to. Jerry had already booked their room at the Bella Vista Bed and Breakfast where they always stayed. Mary and Tom Fisher had been the owners since Jane and Jerry had been frequenting. They were a nice couple, but the business had taken a toll on their relationship and the last few years it was obvious the two did not get along. You could often hear them bickering over details of the rooms or the breakfast menu. It had been part of the charm but now the thought of listening to the two fighting in the background was not as appealing and funny as it once was to Jane.

   As the week went on Jane started to feel better about things and idea of the getaway. They always had fun together. She knew deep down that she had nothing to complain about there were people in the world that were less privileged than they were. So why did Jane hear another voice inside her saying the opposite of gratefulness?

   By Wednesday that week Jane decided to do some shopping for their weekend. She remembered shopping with her mother when she was little. Her mother would say, “A little retail therapy always makes you feel better.” Mom was right. After work on Wednesday Jane went to her favorite shopping center where she could go to several boutiques. She bought a cute skirt and top to wear out to dinner. Surely looking great would boost her spirit.

   Friday came and Jane had arranged for a light day at the office. She went in that morning and tied up loose ends. She grabbed a Starbuck’s on the way home, Jerry met her in the driveway.

   “How is my girl? I am just about all packed and the car is about ready. What do you think your timing is babe?” He asked excitedly.

   “Hey. I should be ready quickly I packed last night so I just need to grab my stuff and we get on the road,” Jane said.

    “Great! I’m really looking forward to getting away and I checked the menu at Coastal Grille, and they have a Wahoo special that sounds out of this world,” Jerry said.

    “Always thinking about food.” Jane laughed. “That sounds good. We are going to have beautiful fall weather. I always like the cooler temperatures and never mind wearing a sweatshirt for a walk on the beach,” Jane smiled.

    The drive out was about three hours and Jane and Jerry listened to their favorite radio station on the way. The silence wasn’t weird between them because thirty plus years of being together they could finish each other’s sentences; quiet was a comfortable part of their relationship.

    They arrived at Bella Vista late afternoon. Mary and Tom’s son greeted them now a part owner of the B&B. He was about twenty-five, very handsome with dark hair and stunning blue eyes. He looked like a combo of his parents, but he had Mary’s bright eyes.

    “Hi, I am Tim. My parents told me about you and how you have been coming to our B&B for years. It is my pleasure to serve you. Here let me take your bags. I’ve got appetizers and wine for you after you settle in.” he said smiling.

    “I remember when you were little and your mom had you behind the front desk in the play pin,” Jane said smiling.

    "Fortunately, I do not remember that.” Tim said laughing.

    “Well, you were cute as a button and very behaved for your mom."

    Tim seemed a little embarrassed with Jane’s comment as his face turned crimson. “Go ahead and get settled in and I’ll meet you two out on the deck with some snacks.”

    “Thanks so much!” Jerry replied.

    Jane and Jerry settled into their room. It was the same corner room that they always got but had a magnificent view of the pool and oversized patio out back. The bathroom was large with a separate tub and steam shower. The staff always left the room sparkling clean with touches of fresh flowers in tiny little vases which Jane always appreciated.

   Jane and Jerry freshened up and headed out by the pool. There was a young couple at a table to the right. They looked very much in love as they were holding hands and sitting very close together. It reminded Jane of years ago when she and Jerry first met. The sparks had faded over the years but grown into more of a favorite blanket that you reached for. Jane had accepted this without really thinking about it. It was a natural progression. Still a pang of envy set into Jane as she knew her life was half over, and the young couple had many possibilities.

    Jerry was quick to make eye contact with the couple and say hello. “We are having such great fall weather,” Jerry said.

    The young woman spoke first. “I know, we are from out of state and can’t believe how warm it is here,” she smiled. “We are from Vermont.”

    “Oh, I love Vermont,” Jane said. “I have spent time up in Burlington and Stowe. It is lovely up there. But I bet chilly this time of year.”

    They talked for a while with the young couple named Maria and Jeff and towards the end, they joined the same table. They enjoyed the Chardonay that Tim had given them. The young couple were wine connoisseurs and had shared about their last travel adventure to Sonoma. They were a lovely young couple, and Jane and Jerry hoped their kids would be as happily married as this couple seemed to be.

    Jane was feeling light after hanging out with them and ready for dinner out. “It was so nice to meet you. Enjoy your stay here. Jerry and I have been coming for years and have made many memories here.”

    As they walked into dinner Jerry grabbed Jane’s hand and like the young couple, they continued to hold hands until after they were seated. Jane felt like she used to when they were dating. It was fun holding hands and memories flooded into her as they studied the menu they knew by heart.

   Jerry said he was going for the Wahoo special as mentioned the day before, but Jane was feeling adventurous and instead of getting her usual crab cakes she decided to go for the Swordfish. Jerry said, “I can’t believe it. You ordered something different! You always get crab cakes."

“I know. I think I will order a glass of Rosé with dinner too. I am feeling like I want to change up everything. That's just what the doctor ordered. You know we are so in a routine and routine is good, but I think I'm in a rut."

    “I love this new attitude. Changing things up is good! You know I have been thinking. We love it out here so much I think we should move out here,” he said enthusiastically.

    Jane wanted to change up her food choices or where they stay but moving out of their home of twenty years? That was a huge and overwhelming concept. Yet she knew she had been feeling bored and tired of the same things over and over in their lives. Something inside of her still fought the change.

   After dinner they walked the beach and Jerry talked about dreams of the future and their move. He had it all planned, and Jane felt a little like she was a bystander. She knew he was excited and was just sharing his enthusiasm, but she felt overwhelmed at the thought of selling their home and what that entailed.

   They ended their evening out by the pool. The owners were doing night duty. Mary came out with two slices of key lime pie. “Well, hello! Tim said you checked in this afternoon. He said how kind you were about the renovations. It always makes us feel good knowing our guests appreciate what we have put into this place,” Mary said smiling.

  “There is a reason we have been coming here for years,” Jerry said smiling. “We love it and feel like family when we come here.”

  “Your son Tim has grown into such a nice young man. He reminds us of our son Brad who would love to have his own business. Brad works in the restaurant industry, but he says how hard it is to work for someone else,” said Mary.

   Jerry and Jane retired to their suite. Though they had been married for years they still enjoyed their sexual life and made love that night. Jane felt as though this night was indeed what she had needed and maybe the 'sameness' was not so bad. She could do more herself to bring newness to her life. The past was what had bonded them and what was stopping her to do some new things to bring new joy? Talking to the young couple had given her new inspiration. She realized she still had a lot of living to do and why not embrace it? She fell asleep to the possibilities of selling her house and moving. A fun new adventure and chapter could be exciting she thought.

   The next morning Jane woke to the early morning sun with a feeling of hopefulness and excitement that she hadn’t felt in a long time. She remembers when they first moved in their house twenty years ago and how fun it was to decorate and organize things. This move that Jerry talked about was growing on her. She rolled over to give Jerry a kiss, but his side of the bed was empty.

    Jane got dressed and decided to go for a walk on the beach it was a beautiful morning and cool enough for a light jacket. Jerry probably went down to the pool area for some coffee. She would recruit him to walk with her.

    She looked out and the breakfast buffet was set up. They had fresh brewed coffee and juice on a side table as she entered the pool area. She grabbed some juice and looked out on the patio but another man that she didn’t recognize was sitting at a table. Tim was near the front desk, so she walked out and said hello to him. Tim had seen Jerry she thought.

    “Morning Jane,” Tim said from the front desk.

    “Morning! It is going to be a beautiful day!” Jane said.

    “Yes, it is,” Tim replied. “You’re up early this morning.”

    “I am and I’ve lost my husband already.” Jane said laughing. “Have you seen Jerry?”

    “No, I’m sorry, I haven’t. He's probably out at the beach,” Tim said.

   “I’ll probably run right into him out there,” Jane said.

    Jane went for her walk on the beach. She enjoyed the morning sun on her face, the cool ocean breeze and smell of the sea. But she never saw Jerry. She started to wonder just where he had gone. She pulled out her cell when she got back near the B&B where cell service was better and dialed Jerry. His phone went straight to voicemail. He went out to breakfast she thought. Even though the Bella Vista had breakfast Jerry always liked to try unusual places.

    Jane decided she would go shower and by the time she finished he would be back, and they could start their day. She looked forward to whatever. For once they had not planned anything and she liked that spontaneity.

    She quickly got ready and when Jerry had not returned, she got a little twinge of anxiety. She called his cell again and no answer. She went out to the parking area and the car was there. She walked back to the front desk and Mary was on duty now. She asked Mary if she had seen Jerry, but she had not. Jane went back to the room and Jerry’s phone was gone and his wallet but the keys to the car were sitting on the dresser. She guessed he was on foot but now it was several hours later and no call or text from him was a little strange.

    Jane decided she would go across the street and grab a pair of sandals as hers were worn out and there were several outlet stores that she wanted to check out. Jane thought he was wondering around and found a cigar store.

    Hours later Jerry did not turn up. Jane was getting concerned. She checked with the desk again and no sign. She walked all over the block and no Jerry. She called and texted his cell and nothing. She started to feel nauseous like something had happened. It wasn’t like Jerry to not text and let her know where he was. She called Jerry’s best friend Ted and he had not heard from Jerry, he assured Jane everything would be fine. Jane called his work colleague Clara whom Jerry often talked with even on days off, but she hadn’t heard from Jerry either.

   Night came and no Jerry. Jane felt an amazing sense of fear and worry. She knew the police wouldn’t do anything for twenty-four hours, so she drove around looking all that night stopping into local taverns and cigar shops where Jerry was known to hang out, but she did not find him, and Jane feared he maybe collapsed somewhere. Her intuition was speaking to her, and it did not have good news.

   Jane felt dread and shame over how she had been feeling lately. A little boredom was nothing and now the love of her life was nowhere to be found. Where was he? She was hopeful for some change but not this kind of change. What could have happened to her life partner? Her imagination began to run wild.

    The next day came and went. The weekend was over, and it was time for her to check out. By now everyone at the hotel had heard that Jerry was missing, and there was a buzz going around. The Fisher’s had helped her notify the authorities that Jerry had been missing for over twenty-four hours. They assured her that they would call if anything came up or changed.

    Jane packed the car and drove home late that Sunday. She stayed at the beach all day driving around hoping to find him, but she did not. She had no idea what to do next except wait to hear from the police, but they had nothing yet and it had only been officially a few hours for them to investigate.

    She felt a sense of dread come over her as she drove home wondering what she would tell her children and friends. This was like a Dateline NBC nightmare! She couldn’t help but think this was punishment for the way she had been thinking lately and feeling sorry for herself. If only she could turn back time and stop and realize how lucky her life really was. She hoped that Jerry would turn up and they could continue their life. Could Jerry be punishing her she thought? Maybe he had sensed her unease and distance…maybe he was off somewhere with another woman… Jane’s imagination grew as she drove home feeling numb. It was truly an unexpected disappearance…