Lost In Your Eyes

The people of Penkot had heard about the lake Laguna and the miracles which the lake performed on people. People came there for the remedy to their problems. Some said it cured them of their skin disease and others said that it had improved their life. However, there were some conditions for the miracle to happen. Two of them were-- First; the person had to chant the right mantra. Second, the person had to sacrifice something to get the favor or boon.

On the lake, the dock looked like a speck of matchsticks. The mountains, which seemed to have fallen in love with their own reflection just like narcissists, stood in a semi-circle around the lake watching every foot licking the water of the lake, every letter uttered in a mantra, and every sacrifice promised by the needy.

Natasha Martin, a 25-year-old, unmarried loved spending her time near her favorite Laguna lake. People had seen this butterfly slipping away, why and where, no one knew. She won't let anyone accompany her while she was in the soiree in her gothic look with ‘the lake’. 

But, today, Adam, her peeping neighbor, followed her to the woods and subsequently to the lake. Her demeanor was quite contrasting to how Adam had seen her so far. A 5"6' tall, porcelain-skinned, honey-color-haired girl with a soft smile on her lips had never worn any other shades than pastel colors which added to the softness of her character. 

 Natasha placed her black bag near her right foot, took out kohl, and smeared it on her eyes making it look incongruous on the white but freckled skin. She sat in a cross-legged pose and started chanting inaudible words. Her hair flowed on her face. 

The silent lake and watchful mountains waited for Natasha to speak and break the silence which had been punctuated only by stridulating of cricket.

Natasha chanted the mantra thrice- "Mum naitram ikshanasmi".

And presently she spoke, “Of Lagun, wake up! I need you. I need power for my eyes."

 She repeated the incantation many times, but she only heard the reverberation of her words. No response. 

“There’s no use staying back. The time is up for today,” she muttered

She had to return.

She removed the kohl from her eyes and started back.

Adam was watching everything from behind an oak tree, merely 50 feet away from Natasha. 

Adam's mouth was agape. He couldn't come to his sense until Natasha was few feet away from him. He couldn't run. He couldn't hide. He had to look normal and nescient of anything that had happened.

Natasha was closer to inches. 

"Hey, how are you," asked Adam, "have you also come for some solace?"

Natasha was startled. She had to look normal though, deep within she was hoping that Adam had not seen anything. 

“Not really. I was expecting a few of my friends. We had planned a bonfire, but I guess they forgot”. Natasha lied.

"So, are you going back home?" 

"Yes, where else. No plans of a night out so back home, of course", Natasha replied.

"Do, you mind if I accompany you?" 

"Not at all. I will be happy having your company."

There were thousands of questions that Adam wanted to ask. “Why did Natasha need to go to the Lake? What did she want to ask for? What would have she sacrificed? And on top of it, how could she believe such superstition?

Peeping Adam had observed Natasha closely. She was a perfect girl. She could make anyone fall in love with her if she had seen someone in his eyes. The only child of her single parent, mother, she received all the attention of the world from her. She had a voice at home and that translated into her character, making her an assertive feminist.

Adam also couldn't resist the perfect girl, Natasha. He had given many signs but Natasha never reciprocated in the same way. It seemed she was not letting herself flow. As if she had a purpose and she couldn't let herself enjoy life until she achieved it. Adam had watched her long-faced brooding over her table. He tried to make move but Natasha had always kept it secretive.

The questions were banging Adam's head. The curious Adam could have brain hemorrhage if he didn't try to get the answers to, at least, some of his questions.

"I have heard many things about this lake. They say it fulfills wishes," said Adam.

“Yes, I have also heard that. Have you ever tried asking for something?” 

“No, it is said that one has to sacrifice something in lieu of the boon. I don't want to sacrifice anything,” said Adam, “what about you?”

"Well, I think, one should give it a try.” 

"So, if you had to ask some boon, what would it be?" curious Adam asked.

“I shall ask for power to see the past when I look into someone's eyes," said Natasha.

 “Why would anyone want such wish?”

“Well, there are few things we better not share,” speaking in an assertive manner she had put a stop to further questions from Adam.

“Yea, you are right. But, I am sure you can answer this question.”

“Which question?”

“Can we go out for a coffee once, please?”

Natasha couldn’t resist smiling, “Ummm, alright. Tomorrow at 6 at Priha café.”

“Thank you for the honor, Madame”, jeered Adam.

Both laughed their way back home.

__________________ 

“Mom”

“Mom”

“Mom, where are you”

 Natasha couldn’t find her mom in the whole house until she heard the rustling from the attic. Natasha tip-toed to the attic. Her mom seemed to be holding some old book or an album. 

“Mom, what do you do here? I have seen you here many times before.”

“Nothing,” mom seemed to have been surprised by Natasha’s present. “You must be hungry. Let’s cook together”. She pushed something under an old table.

Natasha didn’t like her mom’s this behavior. On the one hand, she tries to be friendly and on the other hand, she seemed to have been hiding a secret in her heart. 

“Is this a new book you are carrying, Nats?”

“No, just the old one.”

“This is all rubbish. How you have become superstitious like these townsmen? Do you really think you can read this book and gain the so-called sacred knowledge of getting a boon?”

“Mom, what’s wrong in trying?”

“If you believe in this shit, then you should have trust in the curse it gives.”

“Which curse? I have only heard and read people gaining from it. Or is it that you have tried the spell?”She winked.

“Shut up, I am not that stupid. You only heard about the boon because the lake has become a tourist attraction. The state is earning a lot from it. You know how the world has become; we hide what is unlikeable and show what suits everyone’s eyes.”

 “Mom, what are you trying to say?”

“Have you seen Mrs. Jones?”

“Yes, that lady. I think she had won some pageant. But now she barely comes out of her house. I don’t know why she has hidden?”

“She is hiding because her whole skin is melting slowly. It is like a muslin cloth covering her skeletal. People say she asked for a boon of beauty but that was short-lived.”

“Wait a minute. You said you don’t believe all this rubbish and now you are… you are sort of reiterating the magic of the lake!”

“Well, I am just saying that you shouldn’t even try it? If you believe in boon then believe in curse too. Boons pass soon, curse stays.”

“Mom, ever since dad is gone, I can’t gather myself. I can’t believe that at one moment he was with us and in the other moment, he just disappeared!” Natasha muffed. “I want to know where he has…”

“…It must be… It must be difficult for you too. You loved him so much. You had been a desirable couple. Don’t you want to know about him?”

“Nats, forget it. Why do you want to dig out the past and hurt both of us?”

“No mom, I want to know. And no one can stop me.”

Mrs. Martin couldn’t hide her chagrin on this stubbornness. With squinted eyes and tightened lips, she continued vegetable chopping.

Perhaps, Natasha would never understand her mother’s scorn whenever she discussed her plan.

After a quiet dinner, both retired to their room. Natasha bolted her room. She quickly opened the last few pages written in a micro font. With her magnifying glass, she read the conditions which mentioned: The lake can give any boon if the mantra is chanted right; The asker has to sacrifice something that belongs to them and they love it the most; If the sacrifice is not obtained by the lake then…

“Where is the corner of the page? What the hell!”

“How will I know this last condition?”

“Should I ask mom? Nah, no use.”

She was by her table beside her window. She could feel a glance at herself. It was Adam. She waved and gestured to meet him the next day. 

…..

The next day at Priha Café, Adam could feel his heart would jump out anytime. Natasha’s blue cowl neck frock complimented her big blue eyes. How much Adam wanted to walk the path of his life with her. 

“You look beautiful.”

Natasha blushed.

“You are looking good too.”

“Then is there a chance for us to be the most beautiful couple in the world?” laughed Adam but he meant every word.

“…Stop flirting.”

“Well, what if I am serious. Natasha, I want to be part of your life. I want to bring a smile to your lips that belong to them and nowhere else. I want to know your every secret and tell you mine.”

“Stop it, Adam. You are embarrassing me.”

“No, I mean it. Tell me what’s holding you back. I know you like me too then what is the problem. Why don’t you share with me?”

“Now you are taking it too far.” She stomped away. 

 The day had come. She had to walk back to the lake. She donned the black dress. She kept a hood-cape and kohl in her black bag.

She sat crossed leg and chanted the mantra thrice- "Mum naitram ikshanasmi". 

She went into a deep meditative state and when she came back, the kohl of her eyes was gone and the color of her lenses changed to black for five minutes and then turned blue again. Natasha had received her boon- the boon of looking into someone’s eyes for 5 minutes to know the past 5 years. Every consecutive look would take her in further past. If she tried staying more than 5 minutes then she would go into a coma. 

She wanted to test her new power. Who could be a better option than Adam! She had already started losing her softness.

She phoned Adam to meet at her home. 

“Hey Adam, can you meet me at my home tomorrow at 5 pm? I thought a lot and I think we can give a chance to our relationship.”

Adam couldn’t believe his ears, “Yes, sure.”

____________

The next day Natasha was pacing the room. 

‘Ding dong’

Natasha ran towards the door. Adam was dressed in an immaculate shirt and trousers holding a gerbera bouquet.

“Awww, these are my favorite flowers. How did you know?” 

“You don’t know how much I know you.” 

Natasha took Adam to her room.

“Adam, I am sorry for my behavior.”

“Forget it. I am ecstatic that you are giving me a chance to prove my love to you.”

Natasha was inches away from Adam. Natasha could hear Adam’s heartbeats and Adam could feel her warm breath on his skin. Natasha looked into his eyes. And before Adam could realize it, he was in a trance for few minutes.

Natasha’s eyes turned black. She saw the past five years of Adam’s life. She saw how much Adam followed her. He had not thought of any other girl than her. 

Tick

Tick 

Tick

And the 5 minutes were over. Natasha’s eyes turned blue and Adam came to senses. He could feel the warm tears of Natasha on his shirt. She was in the middle of a passionate kiss when the doorbell rang.

“It must be mom.” 

Natasha turned to walk when she bumped on bed-post. 

“Oh Geez! How could I not see it?”

“Are you okay?”

“Yes, I need to open the door.”

Natasha opens the door.

“Yes please.”

“Nats, what happened? Why are you behaving weirdly?”

“Hello, Mrs. Martin. How are you?”

“Oh, what a surprise!”

“Yea, I just stopped by.”

“Great. Good to see Natasha spending time on something other than that stupid idea.”

“What did you say?”

“Oh! Nothing. Never mind.”

“Okay, Mrs. Martin I will move now. See you. Bye, Natasha.”

“It was nice having you over. Will meet you soon. Bye.”

Natasha went back to her room. 

“How could I not see the bed-post and then mom… Is my vision is diminishing? Am I losing my vision? Could that be the curse…”

“Nah…I am over-reacting maybe.”

Adam was waving from his window. Natasha waved back and gestured that she was feeling sleepy. They both bade good night. Natasha drew her curtain. She kept her head on the pillow which taxied her to the world of dreams in no time.

  ______________

The next day, Natasha woke a little late. She looked lost the whole day due to the weird dream of last night. 

“Mom, I want to say something.”

“What happened, honey? Tell me.”

“Mom, do you miss dad?”

“What kind of question is that?”

“Just answer me, mom.”

“Things will never be the same without him. I miss him so much. But we can’t live in past. When we start living in past, we start losing our vision for present and future.”

“Mom, I think I can tell you where he is right now. The last time Dad was with you. Will you let me…” She bent over her mom.

“Natasha, what are you doing?” Before Mrs. Martin could realize, her eyes fixed. Natasha’s black eyes saw her father talking to her mother. 

“Mona, where did you get this diamond piece?”

“Shane, I am sorry.”

“Sorry for what.”

“I was fed up with penury. I went to lake Laguna. I asked for money.”

“So no more job hunting, no more scarcity!”

“Yes, but that is for Natasha and me.”

“What do you mean?” Shane could not even finish his sentence when he just blew away like sand in the desert.

“I sacrificed you…I loved you so much…”

Natasha’s tears got Mrs. Martin back to her senses. Natasha felt her vision diminishing more. She could not even see the bold font in the book.” 

“Natasha, what happened? Are you okay?”

Natasha went back to her room. She couldn’t believe that the reason for her father’s disappearance was her mother. Should she hate her? But…she had done it for the sake of Natasha only.

           ____________

The following evening Natasha went to the lake. No gothic looks anymore. She wanted some solace. She sat on the edge of the platform with her feet cooling in the lake. She watched her reflection rippled with every touch of air on the lake. 

She wasn’t able to make peace with her past. 

‘I should not have seen the past. It is taking away my sanity. I am losing my vision too.’

She was into deep thought when she looked into her own eyes in the lake. Her eyes turned black. She shuddered. She saw herself starving for food. Her continuous cries were breaking her mother’s heart. 

She was muttering to herself— “I will have to sacrifice Shane. Natasha came into the world because of me. How can I kill my child?”

In the corner of the house 8-year-old, Natasha’s loud cries were almost breaking the glass window.

“I will come back soon, Nats. Please hold on a little, honey.” A woman’s dilemma makes her bolder.

Now her mother was on the platform on the lake. 

“Dhan Dhanye Dadaati.” she muttered the mantra thrice and announced, “when I get my boon, I am ready to sacrifice my beloved husband Sha…” her throat choked.

A huge wave lashed the platform and left a shining stone. Her boon was given. Her sacrifice…taken.

Tick

Tick

Tick

Natasha’s eyes were still fixed on the reflection of her own eyes. The time was over. 

Her gaze fixed, the paralyzed body, and stopped breath…the lake had taken what belonged to it.