Far Away from Home

Their was no one their, I was all alone. The sky never seemed so blue, as the grass was a bright yellow and green. People were dying, while arms were being fired.

"One down, two to go!" yelled the enemy.

I didn't know if I was the one, you know the one to go. Paralyzed, I could barely move. This happened once when I was little, I was so afraid that I literally became paralyzed. I told my self going into this gig, that I had to be brave, and I had to be strong. I vowed, I was the the one who vowed to the US, to my family and to God that I was going to help this country. To somehow make this America, be peaceful, and to be great again.

The truth is, I am afraid and I don't want to die. I don't want to be left behind like Gab; he was my friend. The thing is, when your in an on-going war it isn't about you, it is about being a solider. The definition of a solider is someone who fights and listens to the chain of command no matter what; to be clear, that is the USA's definition of a solider. That's the thing, I am no robot, I am a human being. In my definition, that means that I have a right to not always be brave.

I have been feeling, weak and down lately, because I see my daughter and my son almost everyday and they are getting so big. I have been deployed for so long it, it almost feels like years. That is the thing though, it has been years; preferably three years and two months. Just seeing their cute little faces on this crappy computer thing makes me want to just quit, and fly home to them right away. I have always wanted to quit and flip off the commander. The thing is, I think that he wouldn't be so happy with me. I mean, he never really is happy. He is stern, and rough and tough. I guess that's his job, but I think that he just needs to lighten up a little bit. He always has a bad side, and I didn't want to find out what his even worse side was.

I don't understand why the US is fighting against us, we have already put down a quarter of their men, and it's only been one year. I think that they should just give up. Their is this one solider that I have noticed, he has brown hair and blue eyes. He looks very young to be serving in the military, he even still has a bit of a baby face.

People in my unit, have said that he is the next target, and for some reason I feel a bit hesitant. He looks like he has so much a head for him, so I am debating if I should or not. I had to figure it out soon if I was going to do it or not, because the commander said that I had to do it tomorrow.

It was the day, the day that I was going to kill another american. I never really enjoyed killing people, but that was my job, and it had to be done.

I was woken up by the shot of a riffle, I knew he meant business; it was time to kill him. So I grabbed my riffle, and made sure that I could see his head. Something was different about him today, he didn't have a riffle and he had a flag, as if he was waving it. I thought to myself, was he declaring a "seize fire?" Was this all over?

I signaled to get my commander. He looked very angry, even more angrier than he usually is. He pointed the rifle at the american, and he pointed the rifle at me.......

It's been three years and two months. I don't even know why I keep counting the days. I think that I do it because it makes me feel like he will come back soon. Everyday seems like a challenge, and it is only getting harder. Our daughter and son are growing up so fast, and by the time you know it they will already be toddlers and then be in preschool. It really upsets me because he is missing all these milestones in their lives, and also mine. I started taking night school to get a degree in nursing, and I know it is going to take a lot more school than that but it is a start. I haven't told him about my spontaneous career change because I think he already has enough to worry about; I mean he is risking his life everyday for us. I knew that he shouldn't of taken this job, but I just wanted him to be happy.

For him, taking this job was just another thing that he was suppose to do for his family. Practically his whole family was in a branch of the army. His grandfather was in the navy, and his dad was in the Marines. I wasn't going to be the type of wife that would be overprotective, and wouldn't let him go fight in the war. In hind sight, I totally should have been that controlling wife. I miss him so much, I would do anything to see him, to hug, and to kiss him.

Although, I miss him a lot, I think that it made us an even stronger married couple. Plus, I think that I would get really annoyed with him anyways.

It's been hard helping Ann, she has been a sort of single mother to Ben and Amy for a while now. I just hope that Jack will come home to me and his family, because we all need him. He has always been the rock for our family and his own family. He is loyal and trusting and loves everyone unconditionally. He is actually suppose to come back home in a week. Ann and the kids and I, cannot wait. We are even going to throw him, a "welcome home" party. The kids are even going to make homemade cards! He has always loved receiving those cards from the kids. I think it helps him get through the rough days and the nights out their in Afghanistan.

October, 3, 2005 Jack Bombard took his last breathe. He was an american hero, and fought for this country with grace and bravery. He has made the Navy a better place and he will be missed.

He was gone, and I was all alone again. I was a single parent, and my kids no longer had a father.