Frat Fugitive

“Aw, come on, man!” Victor says, groaning as the beer seeps into his shirt. He tries to swipe it away, but it soaks into his shirt quickly.

“Sorry, Vic,” Nolan says, giggling, his now empty cup in hand. He places a hand on Victor’s shoulder. He smiles as they watch Grant and Oliver stand on the table, struggling to pull the taxidermy mongoose off the wall. Oliver knocks over a beer can, sending it spilling on the grimy carpet, still tugging on the mongoose.

“This is a bad idea.” Victor glances at the door, half praying someone would come in and catch them.

“This, my sweet, innocent baby, is our best idea yet.” Nolan pats Victor’s shoulder and tosses his empty red solo cup behind him. Grant tugs on the wood base of the statue mounted to the wall. The wall creaks as they finally tug the mongoose free from its mounted prison. Grant and Oliver fall back off the table with a thump, landing firmly on the floor.

“Oh, Jesus.” Victor winces as they land, but the two pop back up quickly. Oliver holds the mongoose aloft, giggling as he rushes toward Victor and Nolan. He shoves the mongoose in Victor’s face with a smile. Its beady, lifeless eyes bore into his soul, sending an uncomfortable shiver down his spine. He shoves the mongoose back, its wiry fur sticky from decades of beer and cigarettes clinging to it.

“That’s disgusting.” Victor grimaces, wiping his hand off on his shirt, forgetting the puddle of beer soaked into it.

“It’s beautiful.” Grant pets the mongoose’s head, “And it’s going to piss Arthur off big time.” Victor rolls his eyes, wiping his hand off on Nolan’s shirt.

“When they discover this bad boy is gone, they’re all gonna freak!” Nolan grabs the mongoose, spinning it around the room, “There’s no way they’ll win the Greek games this year. Not without their precious good luck charm.”

“This is so dumb; they’re going to know it was you.” Victor crosses his arms. Nolan trots over, hugging the mongoose close to his chest.

“Us, sweat pea, they’ll know it was us.” He blows a kiss at Victor, using the mongoose’s stiff paw.

“Oh, no, I am not a part of this.” Victor lets out a disbelieving chuckle, his hands moving up in defense. “This is all you guys. I’m just here to make sure you don’t die.” Grant’s large hand clasps on his shoulder.

“You’re one of us, whether you like it or not.” He smiles down at Victor, his eyes still glassy from the six shots he pounded earlier. “You broke in too.”

“I did not break in,” Victor shrugs Grant’s hand off his shoulder, taking a step back toward the door. “I followed you louts in.”

“Yeah, in the window.” Oliver chuckles, grabbing a small party hat from the decorations strewn about the floor and putting it on the mongoose.

“Whatever, I’m out.” Victor sighs and turns toward the door. His hand stops on the handle as muffled voices approach from the hall. Victor spins around to the others, “Put that thing back.”

“We just got it.” Nolan pulls the mongoose close to him, turning away from Victor to protect it. Victor pounces forward, tugging it from Nolan’s grip.

“Put it back.” He whispers loudly, pulling on the mongoose, regretting touching it immediately. He finally yanks it from Nolan’s grasp, stumbling back into a dresser and knocking over a small lamp.

"God damn it." He balances the mongoose under one arm and fixes the lamp before staggering onto the coffee table. He heaves the mongoose up to try and slide it back onto its mount on the wall, as the voices in the hall grow louder.

“Come on, man, let’s just take it and go.” Grant tugs on Victor’s shirt, making him unsteady.

“Yeah! We came this far.” Oliver pulls at Victor’s leg, pulling on his jeans and making them slide down slightly on one side.

“Knock it off.” Victor kicks his leg out lightly, trying to get him off. He shifts his weight, his heart pounding as he struggles. The mongoose stares down at him, judging him. The handle of the door turns, creaking open. All their eyes shift to the door, freezing in place, making eye contact with Arthur and one of his frat brothers.

“What the f-? “Arthur begins, cut off by a screech from Nolan, who lunges forward and slams the door in Arthur’s face with a thud, locking it as it closes.

“We should go.” Nolan presses his back against the door, and Arthur pounds against it, yelling from the other side. Victor nods and jumps off the table, setting the mongoose down. Grant moves over to the window, pulling it open and looking out.

“Oh, hell no.” Victor watches him lean out, pulling his pants back up, “We’re on the second story.” Oliver walks over, leaning out the window as well. He climbs out onto the ledge of the windowsill, hanging off it precariously.

“Don’t be such a wuss; there’s a trellis,” Grant says, dragging Victor over. Oliver descends the trellis, landing hard and popping up with a thumbs up. Grant grabs Victor’s leg, hoisting it through the window.

“Out you go.” He says as he guides Victor out the window. Victor grabs at the trellis nervously, his knuckles turning white.

“You have to go down to get down.” Grant chuckles, crawling out the window himself.

“I hate you guys,” Victor says, his voice curt. “I don’t even know why I hang out with you.” They make their way down, slowed by Victor’s ginger pace. Finally making it to the ground they trudge through the bushes on the side of the house. They run down the lawn, Nolan and Grant laughing as they sprint across the yard. Victor’s truck comes into view at the end of the street and he lets out a sigh of relief. Shouting rings out behind them, Victor looks back to find a group of Frat Brothers running toward them and his heart jumps. They make it to the truck and he slams into it, trying to stop. He fumbles with his keys, unlocking the truck and jumping in. Victor takes a deep breath as they all get in, turning the key and starting off down the street.

“That was a little too close,” he says with a sigh. “Maybe next time Arthur pisses you off, I don't know, egg the house or something.” He turns his head to look at the three in the backseat, suspiciously quiet. They all smile at him. Nolan sits in the middle, holding the mongoose in his lap, nodding.

“You have got to be kidding me.”