The Lone Student

“No-one ever talks to her,” said Joanne whose tall frame overshadowed the rest of the girl group, as if Louise didn’t exist amongst the bench surrounded by the school oval. Sharon, a stocky blonde raised a hand, flicking cigarette ash on the uneven grassy ground. “Ah, that is so not true. She’s got nothing to say to anyone, so people don’t talk to her as often as us.”

Louise cowered as her body shivered while sitting on a tiny corner of the bench, her thigh pressing hard against Elaine whose gaze said, ‘you’re not worth my time.’ She threaded a hand through her greasy brown curls, her eyes a dark grey.

Annabelle whose emerald-green eyes found hers showed a flicker of something she couldn’t recognise until her expression hardened. “Yeah, maybe but I talk to her the most.”

Joanne waved a hand leaning over, her eyes fixated on hers. “Hey Louise. Why don’t you have anything to say? We don’t know much about ya. Tell us. Who are you really?” She scoffed. “Apart from showing off when you put her hand up for questions in class. Someone who likes that guy who ignores you. Forgot his name. But even someone who sat at that party that Ms Milly organised,” shaking her head. “Just sitting quietly in the corner, not talking to anyone. Why are you even part of this group, girl?”

Louise’s bottom lip trembled. “I…I…had a drink at the party. Talked to Annabelle for a bit. Didn’t I?” Her gaze flitted in her direction, but Annabelle sat stock-still. Her stomach tensed up as she picked at her fingernails. Why did they hate her so much? How was she supposed to manage the next year of high school when she dreaded seeing this group daily? It wasn’t as if she’d had her pick of friends after transferring from another school. There it was much worse. She’d had bullies who stopped her from trusting anyone so didn’t make friends there either. What was wrong with her?

Sharon chuckled. “Anyway, who cares when you, Joanne drank like a stupid alcoholic. Flinging your tongue into how many guys’ mouths?”

Elaine shifted in her seat. “I’d say it was at least five of them had a hard-on, especially when she had sex with at least two of them. What a slut.”

“I second that,” said Annabelle. “I wouldn’t have been able to show my face here again. Aren’t you embarrassed?”

Joanne scoffed. “Why should I be? I’m a woman who has needs and I don’t give a crap what anyone else says. Besides, people’ll be talking about me for ages. I’m more popular than ever now. My social media followers have grown. It’s buzzing.”

Louise felt bile in her throat. She hated them all except for Annabelle but couldn’t openly tell them. Otherwise, she’d be fully on her own. Being stuck with them was like having a vice around her head; excruciatingly painful.

Every morning she’d catch the bus to school but rather than get on the one her so-called friends stepped on, she’d sit at a park and wait for the next bus. She couldn’t bare being on the same bus as them before school, let alone after school. How could she make new friends; ones who accepted and understood her?

The school bell broke her reverie. The girls rushed off in a huddle and left her behind except for Annabelle who curled a brow and gave her a reassuring smile before turning away.

***

Over a week later, Louise smelled the eucalyptus and gum scents as she sat alone on their usual bench at lunchtime. She hadn’t been to school for the past week after an uncle had died, still reeling from the shock of it all. Her uncle had been a joker who made her laugh and gave her gifts each time her family visited. It was gut-wrenching to know he’d never be around to put a smile on her face or ease the tension in her stomach, and to make her feel accepted as she was. No judgements, no ridicule, and no ostracising like her current group.

Her eyes darted, and she wondered where the girls were. This was their usual hang-out. Other students stared in her direction, whispering and laughing, as if they were undoubtedly talking about her. She hated being a magnet of harassment when she’d done nothing to deserve it. Could she fake more confidence, self-love or bravery?

The only person she liked was Annabelle, but she too sided with the group and left her alone. Where was she now?”

Bowing her head and pressing her hands against her temple with a throbbing pain, she closed her eyes and savoured the breeze brushing her cheeks and the sounds of crickets and frogs sending her to a space of calm without the fake smiles.

Out of her reverie, a tap on the shoulder jolted her in her seat. “Annabelle. Where are the others?”

She looked over her shoulder. “They’re on their way.”

“Where were they? I’ve been here for at least fifteen minutes.”

Annabelle swallowed. “The other side of the oval, but I convinced them to come back here.”

Louise’s chest ached and her legs turned like jelly as she awaited her fate with Joanne and Elaine, both scoffing at the sight of her. Sharon thrust out her chest, angled her head and threw her a forced smile. Why bother to be fake?

The tall woman forced her way near Louise and pushed her aside until she fell to the ground. “That’s mine and Elaine’s spot.”

Sharon clapped her hands. “Oh, yes, Louise. Know your place.” She grimaced.

Louise lifted herself up and brushed off stones and dirt from her legs, grazing part of her skin. She sat on the bench opposite, near Annabelle who gave her a reassuring smile.

Elaine sat next to Joanne, locking eyes with her. “Where were you the past week? Not that I give a crap, but just curious.”

Louise swallowed. “My uncle died. He was….”

“So…we still going to that party tonight?” asked Joanne.

Annabelle leaned forward and touched her on the leg. “That was rude.”

Joanne glared. “What?” Annabelle glided a shaky hand through her hair, staring at the ground, remaining silent. “If you got something to say, then say it.”

Elaine intervened. “Oh well. Sorry about your uncle, I guess,” she said unconvincingly. “Anyway, I’m going to that party tonight. I know Tony’s going to ask me to be his girlfriend. No doubt in my mind.”

“Ha,” said Joanne. “Didn’t you sleep with him last week? He hasn’t called, has he? Do you honestly think he wants a relationship when he’s had his dessert? Get real, Elaine. He just used you for sex.”

She shook her head. “No, he likes me. He said so.”

Joanne chuckled. “Oh, so it must be true then.” Her eyes flickered over to Louise as she stared her from head to toe. “I doubt you’ve had a boyfriend. Not that you’re ugly but you’re not beautiful either. Have you had a boyfriend?” Louise put a hand over her chest, shaking her head. “Why not? Too frigid?”

Annabelle put up a hand. “Oh, cut it out Louise. Not everyone has sex freely like you do. Leave her alone.” She turned to her. “Sorry about your uncle. Were you close?”

Her heart warmed. “We were. I miss him every day.” She squeezed her hands tight.

“Blah blah blah,” said Louise. “It’s been a week already, so suck it up. Move on.”

Louise’s throat dried up and her hands clenched as she held on to the fuming rise of her chest and shortened breath. What she would give to pound into her right now, but what was the point? Why waste her energy? If only she had the courage to speak up.

Annabelle rose with her hands over her hips. “Why are you all so mean to Louise? Tell me why?”

Elaine laughed. “Oh, big boots for a small girl.”

“Yeah, too big for her boots if you ask me,” said Joanne who got up from her seat, inched close to Annabelle and shoved her to the ground. “If you want to be a part of this group, you should learn to shut your mouth.”

Sharon leaned back, staring. “Yes, bitch. Don’t forget your place in this group.”

Louise had to fight for her. She no longer had to think about her poor confidence or aching heart. This was Annabelle who had supported her over the past month, despite being a part of this group long before that. It must have been hard for her to stand up to them when she had no other friends but them. “Leave her alone.”

***

Joanne faced her, leering. “Oh, she speaks.” Heading in her direction, she stared her down while Louise’s heart palpitated, her body quivering. What had she done?

“Please,” she said while cowering.

“Oh well, if you put it like that then, sure.” Joanne’s grimace sent chills down her spine as she swung out her arm, but Louise dodged it by shifting back.

Annabelle charged in her direction and pushed her into a tall bush. Joanne fell back, with the crunching of leaves and her moaning sounds. Quickly grabbing Louise's hand, she said, “Come on, let's go!” Elaine chuckled but stood still without helping her friend.

Louise ran alongside her as they headed to the other side of the school and walked inside a senior recreation room. Few students scrolled on their devices or played billiards while others sat back against a worn tan sofa flicking through a book.

Annabelle found two empty armchairs near the sofa. “Are you all right?”

She nodded. “I’m good. Thanks again.”

Annabelle played with skin over her knuckles as she turned away, reflecting. The silence was comforting. “I should have defended you a long time ago, but I thought they were my friends.” She clenched her hands. “They’re not. I wanted to be accepted, be part of a popular group and joined in their sick games. I hated every minute of it, Louise. I’m sorry you’ve had to put up with this crap. Forgive me?”

She nodded. “It’s okay. I get it.” She rubbed the inside of her palms and sensed that Annabelle wanted to say more.

“I always wanted to be popular, Louise but I realise now it’s over-rated. It’s better to feel comfortable within a friendship group than try to fit in. It’s like fitting a square peg into a round hole.”

Louise nodded. “I wanted to fit in too because I didn’t know anyone else.” She cleared her throat. “I’m glad we can be friends.” She flinched at the sight of Joanne and Elaine approaching while passersby stopped what they were doing, as if preparing for an exciting show. In their hands they gripped basketball bats.

Louise swung it up high and smashed the bat against Annabelle’s leg. A whack reverberated in her ears. Quickly, she ran by Annabelle’s side as she groaned in pain and held on to her leg. “Can you walk?” She nodded, gritting her teeth and limping while they headed towards the exit. Elaine blocked the way out.

“You bitches are not going anywhere. Besides, Sharon said she’ll come soon.” Elaine lifted her bat and swiped the air while the girls inched back.

As if the months of bullying, fake smiles, taunting, and harassment bubbled to the surface, Louise’s chest exploded with uncontrollable rage. Swinging her leg back and with all her force, she kicked hard into Elaine’s side, causing her to fall hard against the closed glass door. “Bitch,” she said while rubbing the side of her head.

Joanne dropped her bat and grabbed Louise from the back, holding her tight as her vision blurred. She gave an eerie laugh as Elaine rose and picked up her bat. “Go for it, Elaine. Swing it high and whack her in the head. Not that you’d do much damage to her brain when it’s already dead.” Her breath against her skin made her sick as she wrestled against her arms, but Joanne was strong.

Annabelle shoved Joanne in the stomach when she dropped and let go of Louise. Together, they made their way behind the couch out of harm’s way. She stared at the others. “You’re all either too stupid or scared to help, but we’d appreciate your support.”

As if waking them up from a temporary stupor, two male students inched forward towards Elaine and retrieved the bat while a lanky female student picked up the baseball bat Joanne had dropped. “Get out of here. Both of you,” said a girl with dishevelled hair.

Joanne shook her head. “You are so dead.”

Elaine curled a brow. “Ooh, I’m shaking in my boots, but you know what? If we don’t get you today, we’ll get you next time.” She ushered with her head. “Come on, Jo. Let’s head out and not waste our time with these losers.”

A few students had bypassed Elaine and exited the room.

Joanne stared them down for a few minutes then swaggered towards the exit with Elaine in tow. Once they headed outside, she spotted one of their teachers approaching. Interesting.

***

Six months later, Annabelle and Louise walked side by side towards the home of their newest friend, Serena who had recently enrolled at their school. She was having her eighteenth birthday.

“Ready to party, Louise?”

“I am now. Thanks to you.”

Annabelle squeezed her shoulder. “Thanks to you too. I’ve realised that only true friends are worth having because they’re the ones who’ve got your back and accept you as you are.”

“True.” She huffed. “I’m glad Joanne and Louise got expelled. They’ll never be back. Do you think they’ll ever learn?”

Annabelle shook her head. “Nah. Once a bully, always a bully. They crave power and don’t get that we’re all different, but different is not wrong. They don’t understand that some of us are introverts. Nothing wrong with that. But they couldn’t accept you or me. Now we’re part of a true friendship group. Let's head inside.”

“Sure,” said Louise who squared her shoulders, took a deep breath and faced her fears with grace and acceptance of herself.