An Ordinary existense

"Start" , that's the most difficult word i have ever heard in my life. When you look from outside, its perfect. but, every person has their on difficulties and here is mine or even hard to get through it.

I was born in a middle class family, only one sibling, everything was easy since my childhood like....well... my father is well off and mother is a housewife.

Me and my brother were still studying, it was not the happiest family in the world but we were still happy.

I enjoyed my every single bit of life like there is no tommorrow but as the same time i was an emotional person so i get distracted easily.

I was an average person in school, not interested in any activities, just quiet and very very bad at studies but as the same time i had a lot of friends.

I never had a dream while growing up and most of the time i lived in my imagination and definitely not a person my family was proud of. But you know for every parents their child is precious.

So i nerver had any hardships until that day.

My father provided everything we needed until that day and he was planning to take us abroad. He was trying to gather everything we needed, at the same time working at his best as an employ in a company.

And that day came, he had a stroke and was hospitalised. i just completed my graduation at that time, so was my brother.

I....that day i didn't know that my life was done there.

It leaves a scar in my heart

When the joy becomes pain

More than hurt

Dn't live up in misery

Its not like the world ends there

Try to survive and fill the void

If you have problem cried it out

Bt don't push people whom you love

Becomes more than a nightmare

Those who lived becomes tougher, and That's the moment,

the world becomes stranger

Like the mist disappear after the warm sunlight

You know when you get attacked in your life, you get attacked by every side. I had a really bad breakup too. I just couldn't understand anything.it was a double strike in my life.

And i tried to get up from there and i tried my best to get in a nice university for my post graduation and i did with an excellent score in entrance exam.

But just score is not everything, the point was "money", is also important for further studies and my family wasn't willing to pay because they had to support my brother.

So my studies ends there. It was really hard, i only had two things in my life at that time, one is my family and the other is my imagination.

One day i began to start and that was the time, that was the time i found my dream, i started to write down my imagination and it become words and it becomes stories that people likes to read.

I was just a beginner and there was none who would support me either. The society needs you to be a worker not such a looser and you need money to live. Without money, life was so hard.

The truth to be told

The moment to be found

Not realise it until they felt

U have to bear it

U have to deal it

Break your heart though

You can't resist it

The darkness let you dive in

Until it swollow you

There comes your first moment

The origin of fear

So i decided to study and i self studied accounting and become an assinstant accounting in a small school. I performed my best as i can, despite all of the circumstances.

But again life is such a test or you can call it a trial, like any other normal people i lost my job after the pandemic or l can say badluck.

Sometimes i cry alone for not having clothes, for not having food, for not having things i needed and sometimes i stared at the things i wanted to buy but i just couldn't.

Then again it calms me down when i look at the people who doesn't have a home, who doesn't have a family, who doesn't have love from the family.

I was so... lost. I looked for another job i tried digital marketing, graphic designing, bussiness, teaching. but nothing works for me.

After that i tried to follow my dream again but i couldn't start, not because there is no stories but because of the trouble to start again after four years.

I went through a lot during that period.one day i was scrolling down on my phone and i saw a contest. Prise money is bigger but that's not the point here.the point is there is only two days left to submit my story and i was clueless what to write.

When you born to be a star

you can rule the world

Like a dream,for everyone

When hardwork goes down

You look like a creep

Everyone laughs at you

To be dreamt for

From the land to the sky

Through the hardwork

If you do hope

The truth never lies

Look at the mirror be yourself

You fall down like a flower

But remember that

From the root to the flower

It takes time

Bold enough to stand up alone

Again and again petal

Falls down

Mocking teasing laughing

Never ends to that

Like a star never stays there

Roaming around the world like the wind

You will bocome weak as a newborn

Someday stays statue as the sun

Then the world know who i am

but i took the courage and challenge myself and submitted my story finally.

Do you know how much time does it take to write that story, only fourty five minutes and that was the time i realised my potential, i realised my capabilities and i realised myself that you will never know unless you try.