How Far is Far Enough?

One night in San Francisco my girlfriend at the time had a “hot and cold” personality which laid waste to one particular night in all the worst ways. Laughing as we approached a tall silver pole about twice as thick as a street light. Attached to it was a metal ladder that made its way up the length of the pole into a basket up top used to maintain and replace the bulbs. I had climbed similar structures before, but I really was not completely confident in her capability of climbing. Made all the more risky due in part to the bottles of wine we managed to finish while riding the BART and walking downtown. With only a small mention of having climbed a tower of like nature to this pole, her eyes lit up and she exclaimed, "Really!? Lets do it then!" So without much consideration as to the consequences we began sizing it up and figuring out how to boost her onto the ladder. Getting her up and going proved no hard task, however, the hand off of her bag to her from myself went awry when a particularly delicious bottle of “Conundrum” had slipped from the bag's sanctuary and smashed on the concrete (perhaps the fate that might lie in store for us for being careless). Laughing it off, we made our way up and into the basket. The view was stunning with a rich skyline of stars and the silhouettes of buildings along the landscape. Not wasting any time we, without hesitation, made the most of the romantic scenery and shared an exhilarating, 75' off the ground kiss from above. It was magical and most certainly worth the risks. Until she pulled back and mentioned how much better it would have been if I had not dropped the bottle of wine. I had to pause for a second to see if she might be joking? Confirmation came in the form of a follow up, "You should have known that was in there!" Such a stark change in her attitude was unfortunately not uncommon although I would not have bet on it manifesting at this juncture of space and time. I could almost feel the temperature drop with each word spoken in the ice cold exchange. It baffled me how quickly she could change as if she was the dark side of a distant planet after having turned from the warmth of the sun casting a frigid cloak over anything in its wake. Worst yet is that all the while enduring her barrage of verbal assaults, the only thing I could think about is that I am going to have to help her down from this precarious perch. Furthermore, adding to the complexity of her outrage. My assistance would have to come under the guise that I was not helping in the least because her stubborn hardheadedness would never allow such a thing! Down the metal channel, rung by rung we descended in somber silence. A perfect antithesis of the laughter and merriment heard throughout our ascent. The promenade leading up to, what now, can only be considered a “breakneck change in temperament”, was warm, enjoyable, and enchanting. This moment forward, I can only imagine, the return from the grand affair will be cold, soul sucking and the last thing anyone would want while on holiday. The thought that troubled me the most was how much I simultaneously wanted her to lose her footing yet keep her grip, just so that her concerns and anxiety might be punishment for the social torment that took place prior. Finally making it down to solid ground felt like a breath of fresh air after experiencing the animosity of my thoughts along the way. I was prepared for the hostile silence that lay ahead ,however, as quickly as she soured while we were up in the tower, she started going on and on about how “unbelievable” and “exhilarating” our experience had been. Of course this kind of attitude change warranted celebration, so we made an expedient trip to procure another bottle of wine. As much as I abhorred the way she made me feel as if to be constantly walking on a tightrope covered in eggshells, she always had a knack for getting back in my graces. In hindsight I only had myself to blame for continuing a relationship with such a volatile vixen. The conversation throughout our joyous journey was more than enough to distract us from any troubles of night. We lamented how unforgettable it was to be so spontaneous. It was something that neither of us could have planned for or expected and it was perfect for that reason alone. Not everyone is lucky enough to have someone who could be so daring, but for better or worse, I was fortunate enough to have her. The two of us were almost home when she mentioned how much better it could have been if I had not dropped the bottle. Yet again I had to pause to allow, with optimism, the possibility that she might be kidding. Could she truly be in the midst of yet another dark demonstration of her unique and undesirable ability to turn 180, reverse poles and flip the script? The answer, which should come as absolutely no surprise, was a resounding, Yes! “You should have closed my bag before you handed it to me, what were you thinking?! Time had seemingly stopped as I contemplated the places I would rather be than sharing the stoop at her front door. Being back home would be a good start given how I would soon be sharing a bed (or alone on a couch) with someone who drives me 100 percent bananas with her personality swings. Perhaps home would not be far enough. To adequately satisfy the distance I would like between the two of us, I would have to blast off on a high speed rocket past all the other planets to finally find my way to a place as far off as Pluto. Yeah, that ought to do it.