Let This Last Forever

She says goodbye to her bus driver, her small hand waving rapidly in the air. Kenzie has a grin from ear to ear as she turns away and starts running up her dirt driveway, her pink princess backpack flailing in the wind on her shoulders. Her feet hit the dirt and rocks as she ran, leaving behind small footsteps in her place. Her arms move back and forth as she feels the wind running with her. 

The smile on her face seems to radiate even more as she runs up the steps to the front door. Her small hand reaches for the doorknob and gasps it loosely, voices echo through the door and her grin slowly slips away. Kenzie slowly starts to open the door as she keeps her eyes firmly on the ground beneath her feet. 

She walks into the kitchen, letting the door shut behind her. Her green eyes fill with tears as her lower lip starts to wobble slightly at the sight in front of her. They are yelling at each other again. Her Daddy is waving his hands in the air, his face red, eyebrows furrowed, and shoulders up to his neck as he screams at her Mommy. She can feel the rage in his voice. Her Mommy's fists are clenched together at her side, pacing back and forth around the room as she screams back at him.

Kenzie finds herself dropping her pink princess backpack to the floor as she falls on her knees and her hands cover her ears as her fingertips dig into her head. Her sobs go unnoticed over the noise around her. 

She hears footsteps running down the stairs near them. Looking up, her eyes connect with her older brother, Nate. He just started high school the same day she started first grade. Nate walks over to his sister and crouches down next to her, “c’mon let's go to my room, ” he says, standing back up. 

She reaches up and grips her small hand in his big one and uses his strength to stand up next to him after she lets go of her ears anxiously. 

He walks her over to the bottom of the stairs, his eyes go cold as he stares at his parents before turning back to face his sister, who is on the first step, her small hand still gripping his. Her eyes seem to plead for him to make the noise around them stop, for a moment of peace. Nate sighs internally to himself as his eyes soften and he walks with her upstairs. Leaving her backpack on the kitchen floor for their parents to find. As they walk into his bedroom he shuts the door and joins his sister to sit at the edge of his bed. 

“They are so loud,” his sister softly whispers, she is too young to feel this level of desperation and sadness. Too young to find out how evil the world can really be. 

“I know, but we don’t have to listen to them. Here,” he reaches over to his nightstand and puts one of his headphones in her ear then puts the other one in his. He pushes play on the music and lets Kenzie's favorite music wash over them. Their shoulders relax down, soft smiles etch on both faces as they lay down on the bed staring at each other, their hands held loosely between them. 

They lay there for what felt like days, but was only really an hour or two. When the yelling creased from downstairs, they slipped off the headphones, placing them back on the nightstand. 

“Nate?” Kenzie asks as she sits up keeping their hands still clasped together. 

He sits up and looks into her watery green eyes that almost scream innocent, his own eyes lost that look a long time ago. “Yeah, Kenzie?”

“Why?”

“Why what?”

“Why are Mommy and Daddy fighting?”

Nate feels his breath get stuck in his chest. His own eyes fill with tears as he looks at Kenzie’s, “I don’t know why, sometimes grown-ups just fight.” He wished he had a real answer to give her. 

They hear the screams again from downstairs. 

“When will they stop?” she whispers, so quietly he almost misses it. 

“I don’t know, but I am right here until they do.”

“Will you stay with me after too?” She looks down at her lap.

He gently takes his other hand, not holding hers, and tilts her chin to look at him. “I will stay with you for as long as you need me to.” His hand lets go of her chin. 

Her body leans into his side, “I wish we could stay here forever.”

“Me too,” he whispers. 

They stay in each other embrace silently as the voices from downstairs seem to echo throughout the walls around them. They sit there a long time, well into the night, if the darkened lit sky is anything to go by. Both of them are taking the moment to just find comfort in the fact that they are not alone in the chaos that is overcoming the house.  

“I love you, Nate,” she looks up at him. 

Looking down, he leans down, kisses her head lightly, looks into her green eyes, and says, “I love you too, Kenzie.” 

She nods at him, sinks back into him, and puts her head on his shoulder. He rocks them back and forth slowly. 

The door slams open, making both siblings look up at the door. Both of their parents walk into the room. Dad walks over to the bed, pulls Nate away from Kenzie, and says, “We are leaving this place.” Mom walks over and pulls Kenzie into her arms. 

Kenzie sobs reaching out for her brother's hand. They manage to grip their hands once more. They hold on tightly wanting to not be separated. Before their Dad pulls Nate away, trying to get them out the door. 

Their hands slip, desperately trying to hold on tightly as they hang on by their fingertips. Slowly, their hands are ripped away from each other and the screams from Kenzie as they walk down the stairs, leaving his mom and sister behind will haunt Nate for the rest of his life. 

The front door slams shut behind them and Nate feels his heart breaking at the idea of never stepping into this house again. At the idea of never seeing his sister again. He can still hear her screams and cries for him to come back in his head. As he walks down the dirt driveway his feet go next to the little footprints that were left behind in the dirt by his sister earlier today.