Eternal Dawn

As the afternoon turned to evening, Caleb noticed the clouds had thickened through the finely stenciled canopy of spruce trees. In the gathering darkness, they hovered above his campsite like massive totems, peering down at his solemn abode. The ground was littered with caramel colored pine needles mixed with white snow, half an inch deep at its worst. It was late March, and that meant it was the dominion of crows; their harsh tones provided the only auditory stimulus outside of the gentle whistling of the breeze. 

Caleb stared at the fire. It burned well, but what concerned him was the ration of water upon it, which he needed to heat up one of his last freeze-dried meals. He had just four left. One for tonight, and three for the hike back down to his car tomorrow. He’d saved the best for his last dinner at this seemingly picturesque location: chicken Pad Thai. Looking behind him, he saw the trees thin as the forest yielded to the great lake, its steely surface reflecting the ominous clouds overhead. Though the fog obscured much of the view, the rough outlines of two distant mountains could be seen. He shook his head and turned back to his upcoming dinner, taking a swig of water and watching his breath mist before him. The fire crackled and spat merily, playfully licking the edges of its stoned enclosure as though it wanted to escape. Scratching his thick salt and pepper beard, Caleb saw the camera by his deep green tent, wondering if the fire would be a nice enough picture to warrant this long trip. 

He sighed and looked at his hand. So many little cuts and calluses had accumulated on his dark skin during this trip that he wished he’d worn his gloves more often. Before he could ponder his plight much further, a cracking sound sharpened his senses. 

It had come from his left, where the forest was its thickest. The sky had darkened significantly since he’d last checked, and now he couldn’t see beyond a few trees in that direction. Caleb grabbed his hunting rifle and crouched. If it were a bear, he’d surely have heard it before then, and it’d be making much more noise now. So it was either a mountain lion or a large herbivore. He kept his trigger finger disciplined as more cracks and snaps issued from the forest in that direction. 

Finally, a shape began to emerge. Even after he knew what it was, he kept his gun at the ready, calling, “Whoever you are, I’m armed!” 

The silhouette of a human raised his hands and came into the light. “Please, I mean you no harm,” he said, his voice was even, and it held a whisper of power even in its softness. The man was tall, and he had shoulder length brown hair which, despite looking slightly matted, still seemed clean. His beard matched the milk chocolate shade of his hair, and it had been shaped in a genial, round style, though errant hairs and some extraneous growth suggested it hadn’t been groomed recently. He looked young, perhaps in his mid thirties, and under gentle eyebrows he had piercing blue eyes, the likes of which Caleb hadn’t ever seen. He wore a baggy white sweater under a similarly ill-fitting blue coat. His jeans looked almost new, and they, along with his brown hiking boots, fit well. 

“Who are you?” Caleb demanded, lowering the gun but not his guard. 

The man kept his hands up. “My name is Jordan.” 

“Right… and what’re you doing out here?” 

Jordan pursed his lips. “That… I don’t know. The bus I was riding broke down on the main road, and rather than wait for another, the driver told us we could walk through the woods straight north and reach a town. After taking that path, I suspect he was being facetious.” 

“You on drugs?” asked Caleb. 

“No. Why do you ask?” 

Caleb blew air out of his mouth contemptuously. “That main road. Are you talking about the highway?” 

“I… I think so. There were exits and such. I started walking near exit 42.” 

Standing up, Caleb said, “That’s impossible. It’s damn near thirty miles from there to here! How long have you been walking?” 

“Four days, by this point.” 

“What?” Caleb took a step back and narrowed his eyes. 

“I’m… used to walking. In fact, the bus was quite uncomfortable for me.” 

It took him a few seconds to process this information, but when he did, Caleb asked, “Why’d you stop here?” 

“I don’t know.” Jordan’s eyes were honest. “I don’t think I went the right way. I was hoping you could give me directions.” 

“Directions? To what?” asked Caleb incredulously. 

“To the nearest town,” said Jordan. 

Caleb chuckled harshly as he sat down, noting the water was boiling now. “Are you kidding? The nearest town’s like fifty miles away.” 

“Well, in which direction is it located?” 

“I don’t know… Why don’t you check your phone?”

“I don’t have one,” said Jordan simply. “I don’t have much money, and from what I heard on the bus, they’re expensive.”

“That they are…” There was a pause in which Jordan sat down on a log opposite the fire from Caleb. After a while, the latter added, “Well, if you’re looking to get out of here, your best bet is to take the green trail down to the parking area. Maybe you can hitchhike, or use someone’s phone to call a cab or an Uber or something. Otherwise, if you just keep heading north, you should hit civilization eventually. It may be Canadian civilization, but it’ll be there.” 

“I think I’ll take the trail. Which way is that?”

“Oh, you’ll have a hard time finding it in the dark,” warned Caleb. “It’s only about a half mile west of here, but there’s no lights and you could easily miss it.”

“Right…” 

Caleb shook his head and said, “So… You can spend the night here, if you want.” 

Jordan smiled, revealing bright white teeth. “Thank you, that’d be lovely.” 

“I don’t see a hiking bag with you. What have you been eating the past four days?” 

“Nothing,” said Jordan, his eyebrows raised. 

“Impossible,” said Caleb, waving a hand dismissively. “You’re telling me you walked thirty miles in four days having not eaten anything?” 

“Yes.” 

Caleb squinted. “Are you… one of those survival guys?” he asked. 

“I’m sorry?” 

“Y’know, one of those nutjobs who heads out into the woods with nothing but a knife and sees if he can make it?” 

Jordan shook his head. “I don’t have a knife. I don’t know what you’re talking about.” 

“Well, you’re something, I’ll tell you that much.” Caleb looked at the boiling water and at the freeze dried meals. He turned to Jordan and asked, “You like chicken Pad Thai?” 

 “What’s that?”

Caleb tossed him the pouch. “That’s your dinner.” 

“Oh, please, I don’t want to take your food,” said Jordan, standing up to return it. 

“No, you’re doing me a favor,” said Caleb. “I hate that one. I was planning on dumping it anyway.” Somehow, he knew Jordan sniffed out his lie, but the man sat down and nodded, and Caleb busied himself with finding his new dinner: Italian style salt and pepper steak.

“How does one make this?” asked Jordan, staring at the reflective package. 

“Here, I’ll help.” Caleb went around with the pot of water and tore open Jordan’s bag with his teeth, pouring in the right amount. He said, “Now, just let it sit like that for a few minutes, and you’ll be ready to go.” 

As Caleb poured water into his own meal, Jordan asked, “So… what are you doing out here, friend?” 

“Call me Caleb,” he said, meeting Jordan’s shrewd gaze. “I’m a photographer. A nature photographer.” 

“So you take pictures of nature and sell them?” 

“Pretty much,” said Caleb, nodding.”When I started, you could make a decent amount of money off of stuff you got in your backyard woods. I remember a magazine once paid me $1,500 for a salamander on some moss.” 

Jordan chuckled. “That’s nice. I’m assuming these are not your backyard woods.” 

“No,” sighed Caleb, “they’re not. Over the last five to ten years, photography has become far more mainstream, especially nature photography. It used to be that you needed an expensive camera. Now, phones are point and shoot, and you can post-produce anything you need. So now I gotta get all the way out here to try and capture some lousy shots for the stupid magazine I work for…” 

“What do they want?” asked Jordan. 

Caleb rolled his eyes. “That’s the most frustrating part! They don’t know themselves. Last month I spent a week in the Alaskan tundra getting all sorts of wildlife shots, and when I come back, they say they don’t like any of them.”

Jordan looked shocked. “Why not?” 

“Which stupid excuse d’you wanna hear?” Caleb threw him a fork, which he caught. “Just my luck that the minute I come out here, there’s these clouds hovering over the area, screwing up all my shots.” 

“The clouds can be nice,” observed Jordan. 

“Oh they can be,” he said bitterly, “but not when they don’t do anything. And, not when there’s such thick fog everywhere that you can’t see more than two miles over the lake! I mean, give me some rain, or some snow, or a clear day, but not this drab, monotonous… It’s gonna look like I took all my pictures in one day!” 

Jordan calmly walked over and sat on the log to the left of Caleb. His eyes were wide and kind, and the fire warmed his olive complexion and highlighted his smile. He said, “Well, how much longer do you have out here?” 

“I leave tomorrow,” said Caleb shortly. 

There was a pause in which the two opened their pouches and stirred around, Caleb taking a small bite. Jordan followed suit and said, “Thank you again for the food.” 

“No bother,” muttered Caleb. 

The forest was now dark before them, only the brown bark of the nearest trees illuminated by the firelight. Jordan stared out into the void left by nightfall and said, “I wish I had walked more.” 

“What?” 

He took a small bite and said, “When I was walking over the past few days, I noticed all the little charms of this forest. The crispness of the cool air, the wet snow all around…” 

“Tell that to my camera,” said Caleb. “No interesting birds, no unique wildlife. Just spruce trees, dead pine needles, and storm clouds.” 

“I wish I had a camera to capture some of the things I’ve seen,” said Jordan. “I saw this beautiful rock yesterday. It jutted out from the forest floor in a spire, reaching towards the sky.” 

“Sounds nice.”

“Yes, it was,” said Jordan with a nod. “Then I recall this tree. It was older than the others, much larger, and its bark was so knurled and intriguing. It seemed to me like a wise beast, casting its stern shadow over its youthful companions.” 

Caleb looked at him with a frown. “What are you talking about?” 

“Just some things I’ve noticed around here. I don’t know if they’re worth a picture, but I’ll certainly remember them for quite some time.” 

“Well, that’s just-” 

“Look at that!” interjected Jordan, pointing at the ground. 

“What?” asked Caleb, narrowing his eyes to no avail. 

Jordan grinned. “It’s a little bug, moving through the wet soil.” 

“A bug?” repeated Caleb. 

“A bug,” said Jordan. “Look at him! He’s zooming all over the place trying to make his way. The world must seem so large to a bug…” 

“Is it small to us?” wondered Caleb, his eyes locking in on the critter. 

Jordan looked at him and said, “I… I suppose it is rather large, even for us, but only if we let it be so.” Caleb began eating again, so Jordan took another bite and continued, “Those mountains in the west may be enormous, but how enormous can they be if you can capture them in your mind?” 

“What’s that supposed to mean?” asked Caleb. 

“I don’t know. I just mean that nature isn’t always something so grandiose.” 

“I guess… But how do I sell that?” 

“If you must sell, sell what sticks with you in your heart, not what you think will stick in other’s,” said Jordan. “I’ll bet they take a liking to it.” 

“Have you ever sold anything before?” Caleb glanced at him, amused. 

“I don’t remember,” admitted Jordan. “My memory is only of my recent life. I was told some months ago that I suffer from amnesia.” 

“Really? I’m sorry,” said Caleb.  

“I forgive you,” said Jordan. 

Upon hearing these words, Caleb’s heart felt lighter, his spirit lifted, and he began to understand what Jordan was saying. He returned to his meal after saying, “It’s a blessing just being out here, I guess.” 

“That it is, Caleb.” 

The two of them continued eating until Caleb was scraping the bottom. He took both of their empties and put them in a plastic bag which he’d trash once he got back to civilization. They sat in silence for a while, just watching the fire. Somehow, its flames remained stagnant, even though their fuel should have been running out. Caleb noticed Jordan’s eyes were focused intently on the pit, a thoughtful expression on his face marked by his furrowed brow. 

“What are you thinking about?” asked Caleb at last.

“Every time I meet someone, there’s a part of me which recalls from where I came,” said Jordan slowly, “but I can’t recall anything specific. It’s maddening.” 

“Sounds like it.” 

“Sometimes, it’s a feeling of camaraderie. Sometimes, family. Other times it’s a more general feeling. Love… laughter…” Jordan trailed off and blinked rapidly. 

Caleb cleared his throat and said, “You really don’t remember anything?” 

“Not one thing.” 

“Have you… tried seeing a doctor?”

Jordan shook his head slowly. “No. I think my problem is deeper than medicine. I think…. Once I find my purpose, I’ll know my past.” 

“That doesn’t make sense to me,” said Caleb. “You need treatment! A… scan, or something.” 

His companion gave him a knowing smile. “I know there is no medicine for my condition,” he said.

“Well, what about family? The police could lead you to-” 

“No,” said Jordan. “I have no family.” 

“Everyone has family,” said Caleb insistently. “You may not have the best one, but you had to come from somewhere, right?” 

After a moment of thought, Jordan said, “My family… All I remember is the warmth of their embrace… but I know they’re beyond me now.” 

Caleb saw the fire pop and said, “Well, if you say so…” 

“I do.” 

He took a drink of water and offered the bottle to Jordan, who took some small sips. Caleb arched his eyebrows. “Keep drinking. You’ve been on the move for four days; I’m sure you’re thirsty.”

“What about-” 

“I’ll boil some more from the lake tomorrow.” Caleb stretched and asked, “How have you been sleeping out here?” 

“On the ground,” said Jordan, as though it should be obvious.

“Well, take my sleeping bag tonight.” Caleb saw him about to protest, but he held up a firm hand. “I’ll take the blanket and I’ll sleep in the tent. You take the bag and sleep out here. Is that a deal?” 

“I… I suppose so,” said James, though his eyes were full of concern.

Caleb busied himself with the preparation while Jordan looked at the sky, which showed one little white dot through the dense clouds - a single star reaching through the cosmos on a muted night. After a few minutes, Caleb said, “I’m going to sleep now. I’d suggest you do the same. We can hike the path together tomorrow, if you want.” 

“Perhaps,” said Jordan, “but sometimes I get the urge to travel in my heart, and I know then that it is time for me to go.” 

“Whatever,” shrugged Caleb. As he climbed in the tent, he turned back to Jordan and said, “Thanks.”

“For what?” 

“For… I don’t know. I’ll appreciate my next trip more because of you.” 

Jordan slipped into the sleeping bag and smirked. “This trip isn’t over just yet, is it?” 

“I guess not. Good night,” said Caleb. 

“Good night.” 

***

The next morning, Caleb knew something was different the moment his ears picked up the sounds of cardinals and doves amidst the faint cawing of crows. His tent seemed brighter than it had in days, and he faltered as he rubbed the sleep out of his eyes, seeing something impossible through the green nylon. He unzipped his tent and looked immediately to the sleeping bag, which was rolled up in a neat package. 

“Jordan?” he called, hearing no response. 

Caleb turned around and felt his jaw drop. The first thing he saw was the sun, visible for the first time in a week and reveling in its own glory. It was massive on the horizon, casting an orange glow through the clear azure sky, reflected in the pristine lake, which had just the faintest wisps of mist still clinging to its surface. The beaming solar light washed over the distant mountains, which encased the sun perfectly in their solid embrace. Snow took on the bright orange and softened it into a pastel hue, also reflected in the lake. The trees breathed easier in the morning, their needles losing their deathly green color and opting for a more vibrant shade. The snow on the beach leading up to his campsite had melted, and as Caleb gazed upon the scene a flicker of a thought was given to the camera still in his tent. However, he gave it just a fleeting glance before walking up the water. A log sat there, and he sat upon it, remembering Jordan’s words as he watched nature perform her most spectacular theater.