TALE OF THE PHARMACIST

I was seated in a comfortable chair in the terrace of the building. It was night time and a pleasant soft breeze was blowing causing the live coals in the hookah in front of me to glow. Someone came and put in something on the coals, and they glowed brighter for moments as smoke curled upwards. I put the inhaler from the hookah between my lips and drew the smoke in. In seconds I landed on a sea shore with my bag. It was morning. The sea was calm and waves lazily lapped the sand on the shore. Two fishing boats came in from the sea and emptied their contents into baskets placed on the shore. The fishermen, carrying nets, climbed down from the boats and waded to firm ground. I asked one of them “Where will you market the fish?”

The man said “You must be new to this place. In this kingdom of Cyth there used to be a rush to buy fish here on the shore. But since the pestilence has spread, we have a problem marketing the fish. We can’t starve. Nowadays we eat more fish ourselves and throw away what is in excess. ”

A big wave now came in and I had to draw back to avoid getting wet. At this stage a man came and asked me “Are you a stranger to this place?” I nodded. He said “The people of Cyth have always been friendly towards visitors and I’m no exception. I’m the prime minister’s aide and have now come here to enquire about the problems faced by fisher folk. Please wait till I come back to you.” He finished talking to the fishermen, and coming back to me asked “Do you have a place to stay in?”

“Not yet.”

“Come with me. You can be my guest.”

I walked with him, and we soon reached his place. It was a spacious mansion, and I saw some folk from within peeping out to stare at me – the stranger who came in with their family head! I was led in and given a spacious room to stay in. It even had a choice of everyday wear clothes that I was told I could use. The man kept talking to me. He spoke about the disease which had struck the kingdom and said “Several people have died due to the disease and the king himself was very worried. Even my wife is sick and is confined to another room here.”

I said “I’ve medicines which can cure such diseases. Let me examine her.”

The man immediately escorted me to another wing and I saw his wife stretched out on a bed. After examining her I got her to swallow a tablet from my bag. I held out another to my host saying “Give her this one tomorrow at the same time, and tell me how she feels.”

Next day the man said to me “My wife has improved a lot. Thank you for treating her.” She was back to normal the next day. Seeing this recovery, the man took me to the prime minister whose son was sick. I examined the boy and gave him tablets to take. He was normal in two days.

My fame as a man who could cure diseases spread, and I had patients! In fact I was running short of the tablets I had in my bag! Next, the king summoned me and when I went to him he said “I’ve heard a lot about your healing ability. You’re a miracle worker.  You must remain in my kingdom for all time. I’ll give you a mansion to stay in. Since you’re young and have no companion, you would want to marry. I have no daughter of marriageable age, but my wife has a sister Aquila. You can marry her. I’ll give you a high ranking post so that you’ll never be short of money.” I agreed to whatever he said. I married Aquila and she came into my life like a fresh wave. We were happy together. My wife’s termagant behaviour remained a contrast in my mind.

Days passed, when a worrying question surfaced: Why hasn’t  Aquila  produced a child? What I learnt from inside sources was this: The midwife had examined Aquila and said there was nothing wrong with her to prevent her from becoming a mother. The queen had next summoned the royal astrologer - a woman - to seek her opinion. She had made several calculations and cast cowries to try to see what was wrong. She had finally opined “Aquila’s husband isn’t heir-worthy. I know he has cured many who ailed. But he is incompetent to produce a child. Change Aquila’s partner.”  What I heard said about me made me fume in anger but I did nothing about it.

One day soon after, the king spoke to me saying “Since Aquila hasn’t conceived you could take a second wife.”  I could guess the background to what the king was proposing : The queen must have said “No doubt he has been good at curing people who are ill. However, I feel if he was unable to accomplish something as simple as producing a child, he should live alone.” The king was my supporter and must have said “I don’t agree. Let us give him another chance.” Actually with the king’s initiative, I took princess Velka as my second wife. Aquila was given a separate place to live in so that the wives wouldn’t quarrel. Velka was an enchantress, even more beautiful than Aquila. She said to me “I’m marrying you as you’ve proved to be a good doctor. I’ve no objection to your mixing with Aquila.”

 The king said to me “Don’t waste time with Aquila. You’ve to prove yourself to be able to produce a baby through Velka. To help you, I suggest you go on honeymoon to my summer mansion which is a day ‘s journey from here and stay there for long.” I did as suggested by the king. The summer palace was close to the sea. Like me, Velka was a good swimmer and we spent time often skinny dipping in the waves and playing the two-backed beast on the sands. I should say Velka actively cooperated with me in love making. She said “I long to have a baby. I’m sure my vigorous participation in passion with you will yield a result very soon and I would triumph where Aquila had failed.”

Days passed and we were very happy. I had almost totally forgotten Aquila! But the issue of an issue through Velka came up again. Velka said to me “We haven’t been able to produce a baby and the royal astrologer has again said you were incompetent. I need to produce a baby. I don’t need you.”

I grew very angry as what she said was a direct insult to my manhood. I hit her on the head with an axe I found nearby, killing her on the spot. I then surrendered to the king’s police. A trial ensued where I was found guilty and sentenced to death. As per the sentence, I was to be taken to the top of the palace tower and pushed to fall to the ground. Accordingly I was taken up the tower and made to stand on the ledge. The moment I was pushed to fall, I became aware of the hookah bar where I was. I had returned from my virtual trip! I had been unhappy with my wife at home for her behaviour. That was why I had set out to deliver a bag full of anti-pestilence  medicines  ordered by a wholesale druggist. I must mention that I am a pharmacist working for a large drug company.  Instead of delivering the drugs, I had gone into the hookah bar!

I went home and found my wife waiting up for me which was very unusual.  In fact she was very glad to see me and said “I wonder where you had been. You decamped without even telling me! I had wanted to surprise you with big news: You’re becoming  a father.” I knew the event was later than anticipated. I was a new man after the experience with Aquila and Velka! I rejoiced at the news and my wife joined in! I knew she wouldn’t be the shrew she had lately been.

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