In a Holding Pattern

The line seemed to slither as slowly as a desert rattlesnake stalking its prey as Jackson Tillman impatiently tapped his toe and anxiously waited to board the 747 that would take him to Chicago and the most important meeting of his career. His fingers itched to open his laptop and begin calculating the commission on what probably would become the largest software sales contract of his life.

Aggressive foreign competition had caused earnings figures for his other colleagues to remain in a permanent deep freeze, but Jackson had found suppliers in little known niche markets in the US that detoured around the heavy tariffs. By tapping into this hidden cache of products the new deal promised to launch his sales figures into the stratosphere.

With the super salesman lost in thought, an attractive flight attendant brushed passengers aside as she hurried to complete preparations for takeoff. Turbulence in her home life had caused a delay in her usual punctual arrival. Diane Mitchell had fled after a horrible fight and breakup with Jason Wainwright, her boyfriend of six months.

She had angrily shoved him out of the apartment and scattered his clothes all over the front lawn. She slammed the door and rushed into her waiting Uber.

As Jackson and Diane stewed at the delays, an announcement blared from the airport’s public address system:

“Due to hazardous winter weather in Denver and throughout the Midwest the airport authority has canceled all outbound flights until further notice.”

Jackson couldn’t believe his ears.

“This can’t happen. If I don’t get to that meeting it will scuttle the biggest deal of my career.”

Cursing under her breath in disgust, Diane thought, “Bad enough I had this breakup right before my 100th flight. Now I can’t even bury myself in my work.”

The salesman eyeballed the attendant. “I am missing out on a major business deal because of this. Any idea how long we’ll be stranded here?”

“I am not a fortune teller and I don’t run the airline,” she shot back. “I have my own problems and can’t wave a magic wand to fix yours.”

She then backed up a few paces and decided to stow her nasty attitude.

“Sorry. I really don’t know how long we’ll be stuck here. You didn’t create my situation. No reason we can’t be pleasant to each other.”

Jackson introduced himself and began talking about the software sale gone South, while Diane said she was dealing with a personal issue.

“I am sure your life involves more than just your profession, and I have other things I need to do rather than crying on a stranger’s shoulder. Let’s change the subject. What is the most exciting thing you would do with your life if you hadn’t decided to sell software?”

He laughingly said, “Suppose I’d become an international spy. What about you?”

“I’d like to prepare gourmet meals for wealthy people as a celebrity chef,” she said. “Like to learn the secrets of real cuisine rather than just dishing out airline food. Hey, maybe I’d prepare a gourmet feast for one of your dangerous missions.”

Suddenly, a public address announcement summoned the salesman to the airport security office. Two men who identified themselves as officers of the Transportation Security Agency (TSA) locked the office door and began questioning him.

“What is your real name?

“How did you get on the flight where you were named on the passenger list?

“Do you have any connection to foreign governments known as adversaries of the United States?

“Jackson Tillman is my real name,” he gruffly replied. “I booked the flight so I can travel to Chicago for an important business meeting connected with my software sales position. I have no affiliation with any foreign government.”

Now, he had a few questions of his own:

“Why have you detained me?”

“What information do you supposedly have on me and who supplied it to you?”

“Why are you questioning me?”

A large man in an expensive-looking suit flashed a badge identifying him as the local agent-in-charge. He said the government had held up all flights out of Denver because of a tip the agency had received about a possible threat to the safety of passengers on Jackson’s flight.

Their information came from an undercover agent based in Colorado Springs.

The reports said that TSA agents had seen a man calling himself a software salesman carrying on a conversation with a woman posing as a flight attendant who they had pegged as an agent for a foreign government hostile to the United States.

The reported spy also had posed as an internationally-renowned chef.

Jackson angrily shouted at the head agent, “Look. I just met this woman, who called herself Diane Mitchell. She told me she worked on our flight as an airline attendant. She said she would have liked becoming an international chef in a dream career, but I knew nothing about her beyond that.”

Ten minutes later, two more TSA agents brought the woman who had identified herself as Diane into the office in handcuffs.

As she struggled, she yelled at Jackson, “What kind of lies did you tell the agency? I am an innocent flight attendant only guilty of having a pipe dream of a more profitable career as an international chef.

I thought we had struck up a conversation while stranded in an airport by bad weather.”

The woman continued to protest her innocence and asked to speak with the TSA agents in private and to make the one telephone call to which she supposedly was entitled.

A few moments later, the head agent held up his hand while he took a call from his regional director. The director ordered him to report immediately to the regional office in Colorado Springs.

When he arrived at regional headquarters the director introduced him to a man in handcuffs.

“This is Jason Wainwright. Mr. Wainwright has worked for our office for about six months. We recently discovered that he presented false credentials to obtain a position with the agency. During that time, he allegedly had relationships with a few women who he reportedly attempted to blackmail. He threatened to turn them over to various federal agencies as spies if they did not meet his monetary and sexual demands.”

“You will release Ms. Mitchell and Mr. Tillman immediately and the agency will make arrangements to have them, the airlines and the airport properly compensated for TSA’s errors.”