The Devil

The nightmare is more of a night terror, because it feels as if I might die from the pain in my brain, I am desperately trying to wake up, screaming for help, yet nobody comes.

I leave my bedroom on hands and knees, clawing my way to the stairs. Soon, I have a feeling that someone is in my house, that they have given me some sort of drug or put some kind of spell on me and everything I see isn't real. 

So I ask myself if my house looks right, are there any clues to say that I'm not standing in my living room with a wicked woman, who I happen to know so properly, just the sight of her makes my stomach churn in disgust and makes me throw up. 

She is standing right there in front of my face staring at me eye to eye, laughing just like the witch she is. 

She comes closer, then goes further away and then comes closer to me again.

Then I am awake in my bed, my brain feeling shot through. I am coughing vigorously because of the nightmare which left me breathless. It was again one of the most intense nightmares I have had and I am glad to see the light of the day once again to wake me up from this trance. 

That woman who still gets my heart beating in a dangerous way whenever those hurtful memories of past gets revised again and again causing shudders along my body.

The dream changes and I feel a sense of falling, as if I am entering a part of myself again that was hidden only from myself this past years.

I find myself in an empty room, except there is child who looks nothing like a child. He is wrapped so tightly inside a thin mattress that I can see only his feet and somehow his right arm which has become a knife from his elbow to the place his fingers should be. 

I run to him in a hurry in a trial of mine to calm him and soothe him from the pain he might be going through , yet he wields the knife in blind panic, unable to sort out if I am the bad guy.

Someone pulls me away from the small boy and instead I find myself sitting on the end of a large bed in front of the small boy, who is resembling my child self.

I had thought it to be empty with no one inside this enormous haunted room, but soon there is a woman, young and beautiful inside the haunted room with its haunted walls and decors.

Perhaps I went the wrong way, or perhaps it is now safe for me to go the wrong way, now that I'm all grown up, to see what I was saved from.

The only thing which still haunts me is that the woman, I respected and loved with everything traumatized me with something which can not be erased ever. 

I move away to a chair, unsure of why I am there, but there is something about the aura of the room and the lady, who I happen to know so properly and I can't leave just yet. I refuse to leave yet. I refuse cause I am becoming stronger. This time I won't let her win over me. The demons which had taken over me because of that woman, didn't let me live without cursing myself. 

This time I won't let take her take my precious person away from me. 

The lady's wicked laugh is ringing through the room. I find myself staring back at her with no emotions. The small boy long back gone leaving only me and ee-mo in the room. 

She spits her coffee on my face , she had taken a sip from and laughs again. I find my older self looking back at her with those same eyes from the past.

She asks me to clean her mouth and apply her favourite shade of lipstick. 

Red.

The past is replaying again and again. It's like getting slapped again and again from the harsh past I had faced. 

I see my older self, clenching my fists and and tell her to ask someone else to do it, she flinches at my odd behavior. If I had been the small boy I would complied cause the lone thought of her makes me shudder and shiver. 

There is only me in that lonely room, where there is no escape from that witch in that room you had didn't have the ability to even move.

Soon I was in a supermarket with my dearest mom holding her soft hand against mine as if nothing had happened. This moment was something I could trade nothing for. 

Eomma, why did you leave to save me? 

This thought had always striked in my mind, at first. Making me guilty over and over. 

"Jungkook, Kook, wake up, baby wake up ! " I hear someone screaming my name.

Then I am awake safe in my bed breathlessly laying and directly wondering if my timid girl is beside me.And yes she is there holding my hand with a terrified expression painted all over her face.

"Are you doing okay? Reply me? " Yura seems terrified but yet she is cupping my cheeks with her shuddering hands. 

"I don't know." a tear slips from the corner of my eye. 

"You can talk to me, if you want to. I am there for you. \"she lays me on my back. 

I try to look away but her innocent gaze makes it impossibly hard to look away. 

"Yura, I got assaulted." I blurt out. 

"What! I am really to hear that. You know you can tell me. I am there for you." she says and I nod along with her trying to continue, she is still not leaving my hand she is holding since I had awaken from my nightmare . 

"My parents were away for a business trip for like 10 days and my eomma, told me to stay with my ee-mo. S-so my ee-mo's husband had left her. S-She had BDP, that's Borderline Personality Disorder. It was due to the emotional pain she had gone through, because of her husband." my cheeks are wet from the tears that are endlessly oozing out from my eyes. 

"I am here."Yura rubs my arm. 

"She was already hurting herself and when I came I became her prey, she beat me, sexually assaulted me twice."I wipe my tears away from my cheeks.

I continue,"That bitch killed my mom, when my mom had come to take me as in a suprise she came two days before to take me, that lady had gone out and when my mom saw me like with tied wrists, bruises all over my body. I poured everything out to my mom how much I had gone through in those 7 days. When that witch came back, my mom had already called the police, till the police came she killed my eomma. Cause my she was not able to control her self and she killed her." I stop and look over at Yura who had been crying her eyes puffy and bloodshot red. 

"What do you have to say about that? "I ask with numerous thoughts in my mind looking at our linked hands. 

"You are such a strong guy. I love you. I love you so much. But can I ask where is she?" she asks as tears slips from the corner of her eyes.

"She is admitted in a mental asylum. I hate her so much, the pain she has given me through those years till now is unbearable. I was just thirteen years old !", tears are not stopping from slipping out from my eyes. 

She takes my hand and kisses all over my knuckles and raises her head to kiss my forehead. 

Those kisses of her is something which tells me that there is no turning back from my timid girl. 

"Thank you. Thank you for understanding me. ", I kiss her lips. 

"I love you so much, and nothing can ever change that. Today my love for you increased more. And I promise my love for you will increase day by day." she says before laying beside me taking my hand.