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General

      She was extremely unreliable to the point where it was expected. He knew that her "on the way" realistically meant waiting another hour or two. Or she was just a complete no-show. There was never any good reason on her part. She would try and excuse her actions with statements as frivolous as, “I lost track of time!". Like this would justify. She never thought twice about the importance of his time or time at all, nor did she even realize the effect she had on him. But the pattern continued, there she came, strutting in, not a single care in the world except for the fact that she was there.






She was all smiles, seeming ever so

innocent,






like the fact that she wasn't on time again and showed up 2 hours late the last 3 times was acceptable. She didn't even come close to understanding the weight of the situation. It didn't take very long for his trust in her and her word to disappear. Whatever she had to say was completely insignificant at this point.






Time after time, she chipped

away at his patience, the

chunks getting larger and

larger, until CRASH.






        She was on the way to his house one night, late once again and he had finally hit his breaking point. She didn't have the slightest clue what she was about to walk

into. She pulled into the driveway and hopped out of the car and started walking

towards his house. The scene took a turn for the worst. The door flew open and

storming out of the house, holding a broken hand, there he was. He had punched

the wall out of rage, his hand crumbling under the impact. He absolutely refused to accept her late arrival this time and makes her leave,







tears streaming down his

face, a pulverized heart, and

a throbbing hand.







Him and his wife proceed to

hop in the car and head to the hospital. In shock, struck with a sense of guilt, she leaves as well. "I had no idea he would be so upset.." she cries, “He punched a wall and broke his hand because of me?”, "Because of a way I made him feel?" It made her stop and reassess all of the times she's betrayed him with her dishonesty.






The trust between the two had

rapidly been dwindling, and became as fragile as mema's china, which finally

dropped and shattered all over the kitchen floor.






        They didn't speak for a while after that. She took this time to self-reflect. She

finally had come to terms with the hard truth. She was selfish and had been living in her own little fantasy world for a while now. She never thought that she was significant enough to anyone to cause such emotional distress. And to the extent where it would become physical pain? She couldn’t fathom it. She had to come to terms with the fact that whether she realized it or not, she had an impact.






She realized it was time to

"man-up", as her mother would say,






and take full responsibility for her actions. She dug her own grave and now it was time to lie in it. She didn’t do any of these things with malicious intentions, and she definitely wasn’t set out to get anyone. Even though these were the last motives on her mind, she had to look at the bigger picture, step into the shoes of those

around her and look it from their point of view.






She began to sympathize with

them.

     





        Some time flew by and they began hanging out again. He had been patient with her, now it was her turn to be patient with him. Still having major trust issues, he

would go as far as double and triple checking with her to make sure she was

actually coming because she had a terrible track record. Her top priority

became arriving there on time. She was slowly starting to gain his trust back,

but still he would grill her about if she was going to bail on him. He was terrified and rightfully so. But he gave her the benefit of the doubt every now and then. She became more realistic with him and herself about what she was and wasn't capable of. Looking within to understand her motives behind her behavior, she grasped the fact that one of her problems was taking on more than she could handle, like waking up at 7 am to go and grab some coffee, coming over after a long shift at work, or working out, which she never had any motivation to do. She learned to show up when she absolutely knew she could show up.






When she became realistic

with herself, she became

realistic with him.






      More time goes by. He shoots her a text one day inviting her over to hang out. She proceeds to accept the invitation and gives him a realistic estimated time of arrival. She gets in the car and starts to head that way. As she arrives at the front

gate of the neighborhood, she takes a deep breath as she enters the code to the

gate. She patiently waits for it to open and slowly enters, not picking up any

speed, she cruises down the road to his house. As she gets closer, she notices

him standing in his yard, as he was waiting for her arrival, with his dogs

roaming around, one rolling in the grass while the other attempts to playfully

wrestle with him. She's on time. He's excited to see her, as she is him. She

pulls into the driveway and the dogs swarm the car to say hello and he follows,

happily greeting her as well. “What’s up dawg!

May 20, 2020 18:41

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