The Dandelion

TJ Allens sat alone on a swing, slightly swaying, at his favourite park, thinking. His dad had just gotten orders and it was just before TJ was due to start high school. He watched the other kids around him, playing and laughing as though nothing was changing. That life, as he had known it, was being turned upside down. He sighed as he saw his mom walking over to him. He turned his music up a little louder in a poor attempt to discourage his mother from talking to him.

Harper Allens sat in the swing next to her son, holding a couple dandelions. She plucked the earbuds out of his ears. When he sighed heavily, she ignored it. “Thought I’d find you here. This is your favourite place to think about things.”

“Well,” TJ snapped back. “I won’t ever get to get to come back here again, so may as well enjoy it while I can.” He huffed as he stood up, but felt his mom grab his arm. “WHAT?”

“I’m still your mother and you will still respect me.” Her tone, while calm, was demanding.

“Whatever.” He sat back down and put the ear buds back in and turned his music up.

Harper once again pulled the earbuds out, ignoring her son’s attitude and focused in on the dandelions in her hand. “Dandelions are amazing, aren’t they?”

“Mom, I’m really not in the mood for a botanical lesson.” He pleaded.

But Harper continued on. “They are stubborn. They float on the breeze until they find a suitable place to put down roots. And put down roots they do! They will neither the submissive nor the dominant plant be, but they will thrive, side by side, in their surroundings. The grass does not know the dandelion is there for it still receives its fair share of nutrients. The dandelion lives in harmony – ”

“You said that –“

“—with all the other plants around it.” She twirled the dandelions around gently in her hand. “Once it places roots down, the dandelion thrives. The roots that it puts down are so deep that they will, even once pulled, be hard to remove. The dandelion roots will always be there. People don’t even realize the dandelions have come until it is time for them to be plucked and wishes made, sending the seeds once again into the wind. Remember that even though the dandelion is no longer attached to its roots, its roots are still there, just waiting to welcome home another dandelion. No one ever sees a dandelion blossom. One day you look and there it is!” She smiled. 

“Some see it as a beautiful floral addition to their yards and keep them. Others try to get rid of the cursed weed! But, they will never see it grow. They flourish in every environment, from the cold of Iceland to the heat of Hawai’i. They are strong and sturdy plants.” She turned to her son and handed him the dandelion. He took it from her out of sheer sympathy. “That’s you. You and your sister. You’re dandelions.”

TJ stared at his mom and the dandelion. “I don’t get it. How are Kaeleigh and I dandelions?”

“You’re the children of a United States Marine. You go where the Corps sends him. You don’t ask questions. You just go. Much like the seeds in the dandelion. They don’t ask questions of the breeze. They just float along, waiting for the breeze to deposit them where it will. Military BRATs, like you and your sister, flourish in whatever environment the Corps sends us. You put down roots and people don’t even notice you are even there until you’re ready to move. “

“What if the dandelion doesn’t want to move?” TJ sarcastically asked.

“The dandelion has no choice. The breeze will blow its seeds.” She brushed his hair back off his face. “I know that this is tough on you. But, remember, while you still have…” she glanced at her watch. “23 hours and 15 minutes left of your pity party, that you’re not the only one that this move is affecting.”

“Right.” TJ huffed.

Harper sighed. “I know that you don’t think anyone else in the family is as affected by this as you. You’re a teen. The world is only unfair to you. But, did you ever stop and think about your dad? Do you know how much this affects him? He spends his time worried that he’s not going to be home to watch your football games. What if the men he’s in charge of don’t like him? What if he can’t make friends? What if he gets deployed? What if he’s injured and can no longer provide for us like he used to?

“And Kaeleigh? She’s getting ready to start junior high. She’s worried that she won’t make friends. What if she’s bullied at school? What if no one likes her? And me? What if I can’t be the wife of a Gunny? What if I fail? What if the other wives hate me because of my hair cut or my clothes? I know you’re leaving friends, TJ, but so are the rest of us. This move affects each and every one of us.”

TJ looked intently at his mom. “Dad worries like that?”

“Every move. Moves are hard on this entire family.” She took the dandelion and blew it and looked back at her son. “I remember his first deployment. He tucked you into bed the night before. He asked you to make him a promise. Before he even said what he wanted you to promise him, you did. You didn’t care what it was. You just wanted to do what Daddy asked you. He asked you to be the man of the house and to be brave while he was gone. And you did. I remember when Tata and PaPa came for a visit and we were talking about cleaning the gutters. PaPa said he’d have to hire a man to do it and you came in, all of 4 years old, and looked at him. You pointed your finger at him and said ‘PaPa, I’M the man of the house. I clean the gutters.’ And that day, you and PaPa cleaned those gutters. You took your promise to your daddy very seriously. 

“You weren’t given that responsibility just because you’re the boy in the family nor were you given it lightly. You were given that task because your dad knew you’d fulfill it. He had every confidence in you. You proved yourself worthy of keeping your word to him. He wouldn’t have asked if you had not been so brave as to take on such a task for such a young age. He knew…somehow he just knew…you’d be Brave, Responsible, Adaptable, and Tough enough to take it on. And he’s never stopped asking that of you and you have never stopped fulfilling that promise to your father.” She stopped and looked softly at her son. “TJ, do you ever question why your dad calls you ‘Gunny Son’?”

“I thought it was because I was the son of a Gunny.” He tried to hide his smile of amusement.

Harper smiled back at him.. “Nope. You have all the traits of a Gunny. You’re a natural leader. People respond to you. You’re strong. You’re tough. You’re brave. You will always take the blame, but hand out the credit. It’s never just about TJ. It always has been about others. You would be the one laying down your life to save the lives of others. That’s who you are and your father and I see that. We are relying on you to be the one to help Kae through this. She looks up to you and will follow your lead. You have a choice her, son. You can lie down and let life beat you up, constantly crying how unfair it is or you can get up, get over, and get on with life, thumbing your nose at every challenge. How you respond is how Kae will. Everyone is looking to you to be the leader that you are, ‘Chesty’.”

“That my new nickname now?” He smiled. He wasn’t sure about the move, but as he looked at the dandelion in his hand, he felt better. As he watched his mom start walking away, he yelled “MOM!”

Harper turned back. “Yes son?”

“Thank you!”