A Quantum Fulfillment

Some say perfection doesn’t exist.

I know that is not true, I have seen it.

A singular point so pure, so flawless that none could argue it was not in fact perfection.

The singularity.

That is what it they called it, why it had gotten that name and who had given it I do not know.

I have heard the others whisper it’s name. “The singularity unites us.”, “The singularity control us,” they whispered silently as I passed by them on my route along the edge.

The few glimpses I had ever gotten of the singularity, had been short and the trips inside had taken its toll on me, but each time it had been worth it.

In these moments in its presence, I found myself in a place of complete silence and utter darkness, a divine place only disturbed by his own kin, no one else could enter.

None of them had ever gotten close enough to touch the singularity, at least there had been no one returning to tell the tale.

I tried every time, but the more effort I put into it, the harder it pushed me back. For now we would have to make do with watching.

One day I would reach it, of that I was sure.

Usually my kin would be all around me diving in and out of the event horizon as we traveled together, but this I flew alone, floating along the edges with the empty darkness all around me.

Not as empty as

I drifted around the rim for a while hoping to be grabbed and dragged inside the void and when I finally was, a warm fuzzy feeling spread through me.

I was going all the way this time.

***

“Marvin?”

“What?”

“You awake?”

“Yes of course.”

“Then answer my question, please.”

“About hawking radiation?” He regretted asking her immediately.

“No? this is mathematics, we are talking about sequences and their practical uses.”

“Oh, you mean like the Fibonacci sequence? I know about that one, it’s where you keep adding the prior number…”

“…Yes, like the Fibonacci sequence, but we are talking about arithmetic, geometric and quadratic sentences and since you are so interested in physics, maybe you can explain their significance in physics for me?”

He had never heard about any of those sequences before, mathematics wasn’t his strong suit. Why he had mentioned hawking radiation, he did not understand, he wasn’t even sure what it was and now he was being punished for speaking it out loud. Sometimes he wished he would stop saying whatever came to his mind.

“I don’t know,” he admitted shamefully and the whole class laughed at him. He hid his head beneath his collar. The teacher sent him a smug smile and it was in that moment he decided, he could not let her step over him. “But I can tell you about perfection.” Her eyes flickered worried. Before she got to say anything he erupted “Mathematics is perfection, it has no flaws, no mistakes unless you make them.” He hesitated “Mathematics and perfection is one and the same, but neither is real.”

***



It had to be perfect.

He had written the sentence a hundred of times and each time he had deleted it again to rewrite as it always seemed to be missing something.



It had to be perfect.

And when he finally found the right combination he knew it was. The words fit together like pieces in puzzle, like peas in a pot. They were in symbiosis.



It had to be perfect.

Five ideas for a story had come to his mind, he could not let go of any of them, what if the one he left out, had been the one? No.

It had to be perfect.

And it could only be perfect if he included everything, every little idea he ever had, one missed thought could be the one that lead him to success and each word he did not write down could be the word plunging him into a life of failure.

It had to be perfect.

Each story had it’s own identity, own twist, own ideas, weaving them together was the hardest thing he had ever done, but he had succeeded, it was truly a masterpiece and nothing less would have satisfied him.

It had to be perfect.

And it was, or at least it should be, he looked at the sentence before him and a voice inside him could not help but scream that something was missing, that last piece, that last word, that last thought to bring it all together.

It had to be perfect.

It might never be, but he could not give up yet, somewhere someplace in this world perfection existed, he knew it and he only needed to find it.

***

“Good morning class.”

“Today I would like to explain to you the uncertainty principle and it’s importance in the field of Quantum mechanics.”

“A defining principle about light is that it can be both a wave and a particle.”

“But it can never be both on the same time.”

“Take the sun, when you look at it, the photons will enter you iris as particles and chemical reactions will happen inside them painting you the image you see before you.”

“But as soon as you close your eyes, although this light is not chanced in any way, it still it ceases to be a particle and instead becomes a wave.”

“How can this be? Any ideas?”

“This is because light can never be a wave and a particle at the same time!”

“That is exactly right, thank you Adam.”

“As soon as you know the position of a photon it is no longer a wave, you can say that in someway, it is you observing the light, that makes it a particle.”

“When you look a stationary particle you lose all information of direction, acceleration and wavelength and it therefore is no longer a wave.”

“You can look at the world from a quantum mechanical point of view and say that you observing something makes it so.”

“A cat in box, is neither dead or alive until you observe it in either state.”

“Even your own mother does not exist until you observe her.”

“Another way of thinking about this is that everything, is in all possible states until you observe it in one of them.”

“A writer for example, until he writes down the words of his story, it can still be an infinite amount stories, it is almost as if in every story hides an infinite amount of different stories that could have been.”

“So I ask you class? If anything can be everything at anytime is anything really something?”

***

He had searched for it his whole life…

Perfection…

The light turned on encapsulating the most beautiful smile fittingly belonging to the prettiest girl he had ever seen, did he knew her from somewhere?

His bones ached and his head hurt, had he fallen?

He looking into a mirror, when had he gotten so old?

He tried recollecting… something… but nothing came to mind, his mind was a vast emptiness, the only thing left was a longing for something…

Perfection…

A radiant girl smiled at him, he knew he had seen her somewhere before, where? Why couldn’t he remember…

He missed his daughter, he had not seen her in months, years maybe, he only remembered her childish laughter and her smooth voice, she had been almost perfect, but he knew she wasn’t, if she was, she would be here with him.

His room was gray and empty, except for a vase filled with roses, who had given him roses?

He coughed and to his horror it stained his sheets red, was he sick?

He had searched his whole life, it was too late now, his efforts had been for nothing.

Perfection, the concept had always fascinated him, could something ever be truly perfect? Surely not, then he would have found it.

Perfection…

He thought science would have been the way, but the natural laws had given him nothing, but a realization that the world is flawed.

A pretty girl held his hand and talked to him, he could not hear the words, but her hands was nice and warm.

He saw a bird, a dove on the balcony looking at him, he smiled.

A dozen people stood around him now, he recognized none of them, although he was certain that he was supposed to the way they looked at him.

A final cough and long groan.

Perfection…

***

I peered in to the singularity.

I had found it.

This time I would not let it push me away.

I let it drag me in an in a moment I know I was a part of something special.

Something perfect.