Comic Book Ending

Everyone in the lunchroom laughed.

Although he hadn’t heard what was said, eleven-year-old Larry Leonard didn’t have to look up from his peanut butter and jelly sandwich to know who said it. John Bergstrom had been tormenting him since first grade.

“No one likes you loser, why don’t you sit somewhere else,” John said as he walked over to Larry’s table.

“Did you take a shower this week?” asked John with a sniff, “because you stink. I bet your family is so poor that you can’t even afford soap. Haha! Stinky loser!”

Again, everyone laughed.

“I bet those dumb-looking shoes only cost 50 cents, and those ugly-ass jeans were probably free! Are you going to cry because your family is so poor? Are you a little crybaby? Do you want to run home and cry to your mommy?”

Again, everyone laughed.

“We are not poor,” said Larry as he held back a tear, “my grandpa has the first issue of Asteroid Ace and it’s worth a million dollars.”

Now everyone really laughed.

“Did you say that your grandpa has the first issue of Asteroid Ace?” said John with a smile, “I would like to see that.”

“My grandpa said I wasn’t supposed to show it to anyone—“

“Come on,” John said as he put his arm around Larry, “we are old buddies. Why don’t you show your good buddy Johnny Boy here this cool comic book.”

“I am really not supposed to bring anyone to my grandparents’ house after school,” Larry said.

“I will meet you out front when the last bell rings. We can go get ice cream afterward,” John said with a pat on the back.

#

John was waiting by the bike racks after school let out. Larry had hoped he would have forgotten about the whole thing.

“My grandparents live on 12th Street,” Larry said as he entered the code for his bike lock.

The boys pedaled the 15 blocks in a couple of minutes. When they arrived they wheeled their bikes into the backyard and leaned them against the house. Larry pulled the key out from under the welcome mat and unlocked the door.

They walked through the kitchen and into the living room. Sitting on a decorative table beneath a silver framed, wall-mounted mirror, was a large bible.

“My grandpa keeps it in there for safekeeping,” Larry explained pointing to the book.

Larry opened the large bible and carefully picked up the first issue of Asteroid Ace.

“I told you he had it,” Larry said nervously.

“Let me hold it,” said John with a friendly smile.

Larry remembered his grandfather showing him the comic when he was in the third grade. He told Larry that the book was very valuable and wasn’t meant for little boys to play with. Larry liked the bright colors on the cover but promised he would never touch the book.

“Come on, just for a second. I just want to see how cool it is up close,” John said.

Feeling more nervous than he had ever felt in his eleven years of life, he handed the book over. He held his breath as John took it from him.

“Wow, this is so cool,” he said as he held the book up, “it feels really old.”

John ripped the book in half. He laughed, then threw the two halves in the air. He watched as Larry’s wide eyes filled with tears.

“See you in school tomorrow, crybaby,” he said as he headed for the door.

Larry fell to his knees, tears pouring down his face. He held the two halves of the comic book together wishing he could magically reconnect them.

#

“Did you see that tv show Roadshow Antiques is coming to town tomorrow?” asked Larry Leonard’s wife Jessica, “I think you should take your 70-year-old ripped in half comic book down there.”

“Right, so everyone in America can laugh at me for being a dumbass,” he answered, “no thanks.”

“Honey, no one is going to laugh at you, it happened when you were 11 years old. Besides, even ripped in half it must be worth something,” she said.

#

“I can’t believe you are making me do this,” Larry said to his wife the next morning as she fixed his collar, “your husband is about to become a meme for stupidity.”

“Well, it’s a good thing I like you for your looks and not your brain,” she said with a smile.

“Besides, we can go out for ice cream afterward,” she added referring to his often-told story.

“Yeah, really funny,” he said as he walked out the door.

#

“Welcome to Roadshow Antiques, why don’t you tell me about this comic book,” said the comic book expert with the handlebar mustache.

“Well, my grandfather had this comic book for years. He kept it stored between the pages of a very large bible. It was an old bible that never got used, so it was a safe place to store the comic,” said Larry.

“One day in sixth grade a few of my classmates were making fun of me because I was wearing inexpensive jeans and sneakers. To prove to them that my family wasn’t poor I blurted out that we had this very valuable comic book.”

“Well, the class bully decided to invite himself over to my grandparents’ house after school so I could show him this comic book. He promised we would be best friends. I knew with every fiber of my being that I shouldn’t let him touch the book. Sure enough, he ripped it in half. He laughed while I cried. I had let down my grandfather and my entire family.”

“I am sorry,” Larry said wiping away a tear, “it still bothers me to this day.”

“Because the condition is everything for collectors,” said the expert, “when this book was torn in half the value wasn’t just cut in half. Unfortunately, in this condition, the retail value is next to nothing. If it was in near-mint condition it could bring in anywhere between 1.5 and 2.5—“

There was a long pause to build a dramatic effect. The television audience would have to watch a few commercials before they could see Larry receive the news he had dreaded since that day in his grandparents’ living room. In real-time, Larry would have to wait the five longest seconds of his life.

“—dollars, maybe three bucks. This book is a reprint, not an original,” said the expert, “you can finally forgive yourself.”

#