At First Sight

We didn’t leave the apartment all weekend. The bruises on the right side of my body are nearly gone, the scratch on my head has healed enough that I can cover it with foundation and my mental health is in a way better place then it was a couple days ago. Alyse and I ordered take-out every night and paired it with a binge of Grey’s Anatomy episodes. 

“I think I might go outside today,” I say, looking out the window from my desk. 

Alyse’s head shoots up from the couch and looks over at me, “Really?”

“Yeah. I think it’s time.”

“Well, let me get dressed I’ll go with you.”

She gets up off the couch and sets her phone on the coffee table.

“No,” I say, standing up, “you are going to go home.”

I walk into my bedroom and look for a hoodie to throw on. While I’m digging through my closet for my wool sweater, Alyse comes in and sits on the bed.

“Are you sure you want me to go home? I can stay.”

I finally find the beige wool sweater tucked inside my “Winter Clothes” box and pull it out.

“No, it’s okay. I appreciate it, but I think I need to do this alone,” I give her a soft smile and pull the hoodie over my head.

“What if I need to stay here?”

“What do you mean?” 

“Well,” she gets up off the bed and walks to the dresser. “What if I would feel more comfortable staying just one more night,” she fiddles around with my jewelry box that’s on my dresser. “Ya know, to make sure you’re going to be okay.”

“Alyse,” I say walking over to her, “You’ve been here for four days. As much as I love you and appreciate your help with all of this, I would love for you to wear some of your own clothes and not mine.”

We laugh.

“But I’m going to worry about you.”

I can see in her deep brown eyes that she is genuinely concerned with leaving me at home by myself, but the thought of having to keep relive that night through her is too much. 

“Fine, you can stay one more night.”

“Yay!”

“But, I’m going to Liv’s to try to get some work done for the club…” Alyse starts putting her shoes on, “and you have to stay here.”

“Wait, but you just said..”

“I said you could stay another night, but how am I supposed to know if I am truly okay if I have you to help me through every emotion and task?”

Her face drops and she shakes her head, “I get it. Can you bring me a coffee back though?”

“I can do that!” I walk to the living room, “I’ll text you when I head back. I shouldn’t be there too late.”

It’s Monday morning. Every Monday since I moved onto this block about six months ago I have gone to Liv’s Coffee shop and worked on a project. On a normal Monday afternoon, I throw my headphones on and turn my brain off. But the walk today was different.

Today I noticed everything. 

I noticed that it’s windy, but sunny.

The leaves are starting to change color as a result of Fall slowly creeping closer.

And it’s quiet. There’s barely anyone on the street and the cars that were out here on Friday night are mostly gone. 

As I approach Liv’s Coffee shop the smell of fresh roasted coffee fills my lungs and a since of tranquility rushes over me. Liv’s is near my house, maybe a five to eight minute walk, so spending the majority of my time here is absolutely necessary. The barista, Sarah, a college student studying at the University knows me so well that she gives me a free croissant every time I come in to buy a coffee. I’m not sure if it has to do with me always leaving a big tip or just the fact that she likes me. Either way, I’m all for it.

Liv’s is like my little sanctuary- it’s painted a light pastel green, has brown tables and chairs, big windows that let all the natural light in. The pastries and breads are set out fresh every morning, so the warm aromas of bread and sweets fill the shop making you salivate as soon as you walk in. I swear I smell like bread every time I leave here.

Not to mention they have the best coffee on this side of town. It’s a local blend made right here in the state by a local family! It’s just a warm space filled with people and plants of all backgrounds. It’s the one thing that I think I need the most right now. Surrounded by something familiar, but with the disadvantage of seeing people I don’t know.

I enter the shop and head over to my usual spot by the window. I scan the QR code and order my Pumpkin Chai Latte with Almond milk and pull my laptop out. As I sit there waiting for my coffee, I catch myself people watching. I’ve always had this habit of watching and imagining what others are going through, but today it was triggering to imagine what they could be dealing with. Could it be worse or better than what I’ve gone through? Are they living a secret life that no one knows about? Is that the person from the club? As thoughts continue racing through my mind, a girl standing on the corner in front of an orange van catches my eye. 

She seems to be happy, like she’s doing exactly what she wants. Is my life ever going to be any where near as happy as hers? This girl wearing a red leather jacket with half white and black hair with kickass shoes is standing at the corner waiving down a couple of guys.

My body tenses up.

The guys see her and make there way over to her. One is wearing the same leather jacket as her and the others are in jeans and t-shirts. 

I release a sigh as he hands her a smoothie and passionately kisses her before opening the van door and helping her in. I watch them drive off and get stuck staring out the window. As I’m watching the van turn the corner, a black Range Rover pulls into the parking lot across the street. As the van with the happy girl is no longer in sight, I pull my computer out of my bag and turn it on.

“Hey, you didn’t come grab your latte so I thought I’d bring it over to you,” said the barista holding it out.

“Oh, thank you,” I say with a slight smile.

“No problem,” she says, and walks towards the front desk.

A chill runs through the air as the door swung open and a dark, tattooed man walked through the shop. I didn’t notice him at first, but when I got up to grab some napkins I bumped right into him.

“Oh.”

“Oh, I’m sorry,” I say, looking up at him.

“Sena?”

“Do I know you,” I brush the hair behind my ear.

“From the other night…”

I raise my brow.

“I was with Alyse,” he whispers.

“Oh, right,” I head back to my table.

I thought he looked familiar. 

As I sit down at the table, I can feel him following. 

“Do you mind?” he says, his big hand on the back of the chair.

“Um, sure.”

He slides the chair out across the wooden floor and sits besides me. Unraveling his sandwich the coffee shop door swings open and sends his scent fluttering through the air. It’s a scent that I remember from somewhere, but I just can’t seem to put my finger on it. 

The first thing I noticed when he sat down was his arm tattoos- traditional, but based on African Heritage. His hair was dark, but I couldn’t tell what type of hair he had as it was put back into braids. He was wearing fresh Air Force 1s and had a smile that could light up a room. As I watched him bite into his sandwich, I realized that I wasn’t breathing. I was asphyxiated by him.

“Hey,” I say catching my breath, “Where do I know you from again?”

He looks up at me with confusion, “I brought you home after the club on Friday.”

I didn’t say anything. As he looked at me my face started to feel hot.

“Are you okay?” he says, placing his sandwich down.

“Um,” I take a deep swallow, “Yeah.”

As my brow starts to sweat and I start looking around the room, he sits back in the chair.

“Hey,” he says.

I look at him with a vexatious look as I search for a fast exit out of here.

“I’m J. I helped Alyse carry you home after the incident. I was the one who handed you water after you woke up.”

As the alarms that were going off in my head quiet, I remember a tall dark figure in my apartment that night.

“That was you?” I say, relaxing into my chair and reaching out for my latte.

It was as if a breath of fresh air hit him and me at the same time. His once tense body, relaxed back into his chair and he picked his sandwich back up, “Yes.”

“Oh, thank gosh,” I say. “I thought you were him for a moment there.”

“Oh gosh no, sorry,” he chuckles, “I should’ve made myself more clear when I said I was from the other night.”

“Yeah,” I laugh, “I was planning my exit plan.”

“I’m glad to see you’re smiling.”

I shake my head, “Yeah, it’s been a rough couple of days. This is my first time leaving the house.”

“Good for you,” he says, playing with his smoothie cup.

As he looks at me and I look at him, I wonder if he can feel the tension cutting the air.

I clear my throat, “So, um. Thank you for the other night..”

“Oh, you don’t need to thank me for that.”

“Yes, I do. If you weren’t there I don’t know what might of happened.”

He reaches across the table and touches my hand, “You don’t need to thank me. He shouldn’t of been doing what he was.”

He sits back in his chair, “And quite frankly, I would’ve kept beating his ass if you didn’t pass out.”

He looks at me waiting for a reaction, hoping that what he said didn’t offend me. I start laughing.

“Oh good, you’re laughing.”

“I really did hit that concrete kind of hard, didn’t I?”

.

.

.

As his eyes trace her body from her perfectly sculpted face down to her small hands, he winces. 

As Chris looks through the big window into the coffee shop, he realizes that the man touching her hand is the same man who stole her from him at the club. This makes him furious. He sits there with fumes coming out of his ears as he watches another man lean into his woman. 

The audacity of this man.

He grips the stirring wheel, hands turning red from the pressure he’s forcing against it. Breath speeding up as he sees her laughing at his jokes. He has to do something. 

He searches around his car as a distraction, but he can’t get the image of J touching his woman out of his head. If he lets them flirt anymore all hope for him is lost. The panic starts to set in as Sena picks up her phone and he quickly leans forward in his seat and flashes his headlights. 

That should do it, he thinks.

As the lights kiss the glass of the coffee shop, Sena looks out the window. 

“There you go baby,” he says with a devilish grin. 

Her eyes pierce his as he admires her through the glass. 

“Did you see that?”

“See what?” J says, looking out the window.

“Must’ve been a car driving by or something.”

I look at my phone and see that it’s already 6 P.M. I look up at him and as my mind finally realizes what time it says my face and eyes go wide.

“Oh shit,” I say, as I gather all my stuff together.

“What’s wrong?”

“I have to go. I told Alyse I wouldn’t stay here too long and it’s already been way too long,” I giggle. 

“Well, can I at least give you a ride?”

“I don’t live too far from here. The fresh air has been nice after being couped up in the house all day.”

“I’ll walk with you then.”

He stands from his chair and gathers the trash to throw it away before I could plead with him. As I watch him walk back from the trash can, I can’t help but to smile.

“What?” he says, pushing the chair back under the table.

I ruffle some things in my bag and say, “Oh, nothing. You’re just a gentleman.”

“I’ll tell my momma you appreciate her for raising me right,” he grins. 

I grab my things and head for the door, when I looked back to hold the door open for him, he wasn’t behind me. As I peak through the glass door, I see him place a big cash tip into the silver tip jar and smile at the barista. As he turned and walked back out the shop towards me, I lost my breath. 

“I was wondering where you went.”

“I forgot to tip earlier,” he says, placing his hands in his pockets.

“Ah,” I say. “I’m this way,” I say pointing to the right.

“I remember,” he says.

“Oh yeah,” I chuckle. “So, why were you in the club that night?”

“I was celebrating.”

“Celebrating what?” I say.

“Well, I just moved back to town to open my own shop.”

I stop.

“What?” He says, turning around to look at me.

As I walk forward I say, “That’s amazing! What kind of shop is it?”

He walks backwards as he waits for me to catch up, “A clothing line. I was working at this tech company back in Detroit and selling my clothes on the side. But truthfully, I hated working there. I saved up a bunch of money and decided to quit and open my own shop.”

“That’s cool, but why here?” I laugh.

He chuckles, “When I would come home to visit, I always knew I’d come back here. I guess it just took me longer than I thought.”

“Hm. So when does this shop open?”

“Um, today actually.”

“Wait, seriously?”

“Yeah, I cut the ribbon earlier today before I ran into you at the coffee shop.”

“Oh, that’s so exciting. I’ll have to stop by sometime.”

“You should, we have ladies clothes too!”

I laugh, “I’ll have to bring Alyse.”

“Oh, definitely. I think I have just the fit for her,” he says, as we cross the street.

“I bet you do.”

As I step ahead of him to cross the street, a gush of wind comes flying at me. I turn to walk backwards and start to ask him about the opening, when a black Range Rover comes speeding around the corner.

J yells, “SENA!” As he grabs me like I have a football heading for the end zone and tackles me. Before I could comprehend what just happened, I was face down on top of J on the side walk in front of my house. 

“Oh my gosh, what happened?”

“There was a crazy ass driver speeding down the street! He almost fucking hit you! Are you okay?”

He’s squeezing my arms and holding my face with his other hand carefully checking me over. 

“I’m okay, I think?”

His chest rising and falling as he tries to catch his breath, but keeping eye contact with me. Only when he was sitting next to me did I notice I wasn’t breathing. 

I exhaled.

“Wow,” I say. “That was crazy.”

“Yeah,” he says. “At least, we landed on the grass.”

I look at him as he stands up and start laughing.

“What’s so funny?” He says, reaching down to help me up.

“That’s the second time this week you’ve saved me.”

He laughs, “I guess I’m your very own superman,” and pulls me up.

.

.

.

“Fuck. Fuck. Fuck!” He says, speeding down the street. 

“I fucking missed him.”

As his nerves are starting to set in, he frantically looks in the rear view mirror to try and see if anyone is following him. He’s relieved when he makes it out of the neighborhood unscathed and hits the highway to head to home. The whole way home, he kept checking his mirrors.

One to make sure no cops were following.

Two to make sure he wasn’t being followed.

And lastly, to remind himself how he got here.

He gets trapped in the rear view mirror looking at him and sees his reflection. A cut on his hairline where he stitched himself up. A black eye covering almost his whole cheekbone that even with make up just won’t be covered. He reaches into the glove box to grab a pack of cigarettes and puts one on his big, cut up lip. 

“Next time, I’ll make sure to get him.”