WB’s Autobiography (part 4)

A/N: Hey guys! Tis part four of the WB series! I recommend reading the others first. Enjoy!

****

Hey, y’all! This is WB, and this is my story, written by me and for me (cause I’m so darn awesome). I know, I know, many of you hate me, and probably all of you have fallen in my trap at some point, but will you at least give me a chance? Let me tell it from my perspective, and maybe that’ll change your mind. I’m no villain, I’m the hero!

It all started one day, ever so long ago. I was here way before y’all were born. As long as Inspiration existed, I was here right beside her. Now, if you want an enemy, Inspiration’s your gal. She hates me so much. She’s the one out to destroy the world, not me! 

Anyways, back to my story. 

One of the common questions I receive from people is where I come from.

It’s simple. I simply exist, just like the rest of y’all. I’ve got my job to do, just like y’all have a purpose. So I’ll come to you and block your bad story ideas, and then I’ll leave again. It’s that simple. 

I’ve even helped out the most famous authors of all time like Shakespeare, Longfellow, Twain, Hemingway, Lewis, Dickens, Jane Austen, Steinbeck, Seuss, Poe, Dahl, Andersen, Tolkien, Rowling, Collins, King, Patterson, Riordan… the list goes on and on! 

I’ve paid them all a visit at one point or another. 

Yet, many of them have created great things because of me! They’ve grown in their expertise when I’ve been with them! Look, I only block the bad stuff from getting to you. I’ll block the bad stuff for a little while, and then you’ll be able to write again, even more decently than before! That’s not that bad, right?

Many people have asked where I live. Well, I’ve got a place in the world, just like most of y’all, which is in the Writer’s Warehouse. It’s basically like a huge convention center for all things writing. I’ll have to give you a tour sometime. 

*adds to the mental checklist of things to do*

Moving on now. My story honestly isn’t really about me. It’s what I do for the good of all of you. You are a part of my story, can you believe that? I’ve helped you all, whether you believe it or not. I’m a beneficial factor of your very community! 

Let’s see, what are some other questions… ah yes! Why do I like ‘tormenting’ writers so much? Well, firstly, I don’t torment you or nothin’! I’m just a simple little angel out there to make the world a better place!

What’s this… I hear distant shouts in the background…

Agh, no, it’s Inspiration! Run for your life!!

*crashes and bangs in the distance*

Ah, what’s this? Writer’s Block has been journaling again, it seems. 

Allow me to introduce myself, fabulous readers! Inspiration is my name and inspiring writers is my game! How do you do? 

Please allow me to fill you in on the details. 

WB is an absolute menace! He never lets me into your mind soon enough! Sometimes, I literally have to beg for him to let me in. What a creep. And guess what, he actually steals your ideas and uses them for himself! What a jerk! 

But there is still hope. I know a secret that will stop WB forever! Listen closely, dear reader. There is a special key kept in a few disclosed places. Only you as readers know where it is hidden. Don’t listen to the lies of the internet, they shall never prevail! 

The only way to lock WB out forever is to truly block him out from your heart and mind, dear author. Don’t let silly WB get you down.

*angry shouts in the background*

Whoopsies, looks like I must get going. Talk to you later, dear friends! Ta Ta for now!

Ugh, sorry guys. Inspiration over there kinda tied me to a chair. I told you, she hates me. And I would delete her words in my autobiography, but she said that she’d fire me if I deleted a single word she said. So yeah. Now back to blocking out the bad and letting in the good! I shall certainly see you again! 

WB signing off…

for now.

If you were to have a question for WB, what would it be?