66 comments
https://wp.me/pd3y1A-dP
Find the perfect editor for your next book
Over 1 million authors trust the professionals on Reedsy, come meet them.
Menu
CONNECT
Editing
Design
Marketing
Publicity
Ghostwriting
Websites
BLOG
Success Stories
APPS
TOOLS
Book Promotion Sites Book Review Blogs Booktube Channel Guide Book Title Generator Character Name Generator Independent Publishers Literary Agents Literary Magazines Pen Name Generator Plot Generator Publishers Directory Short Story Ideas Writing Contests Writing Exercises Writing ScholarshipsABOUT
About Reedsy Terms PrivacyWhen the Moon Shines
Written in response to: End your story with a character standing in the rain.... view prompt
September 20, 2021 09:49
You must sign up or log in to submit a comment.
66 comments
Hey Dhwani! I loved this story and the observations. A message to all of us to sometimes just stop running and slow down to look at the things which blurred as we ran. The format reminded me a lot of a short story I read recently, 'Who Moved My Cheese'...All in all, wonderful job! No critique! (Sorry, I'm bad at critiquing lol-)
Reply
Thanks a lot Queen! I am so grateful for this comment.
Reply
And.....3.....2...........1 👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏
Reply
What's this for?
Reply
YOUR AMAZING STORY
Reply
=D Thank you, Sienna!!!!!
Reply
And.....3.....2...........1 👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏
Reply
That's very kind of you!
Reply
WAIT! DHWANI THE ANSWER TO YOUR SECOND QUESTION IS GENIE!!! A.K.A ROBIN WILLIAMS AND THIRTY THOUSAND OTHER PEOPLEEEE
Reply
It is Robbin Williams only, he dubbed the whole genie part and he modulated his voice very well!
Reply
I know! He was very talented! (Scarlet Thread pt 2 is out as well!!!)
Reply
Okay....will check it out!
Reply
this is amazing and heartfelt and i love it
Reply
You got any critiques?
Reply
ack im horrible at critique- i have none. this is just so amazing and beautiful like i have no words-
Reply
Okay...thanks =D Also, I know you were not able to see the photo, so here it is: https://djdhwanijain.files.wordpress.com/2021/09/moon.jpeg?w=768 (try to open it this way)
Reply
still blocked grr TvT
Reply
SPEED CHALLENGE
Reply
OH GOSH OK UM MAKE A GOOGLE DOC AND SEND ME LINK SO WE CAN DO IT ON THERE LOL
Reply
Can we do it here?
Reply
Wowza. I really liked this one, DJ. Stars, the moon, nighttime, 2nd person, details, what else could one ask for? It flowed super well, and I love the observations that ‘you’ make :) the pic is supa coolio!!!
Reply
Thanks a lot Flow! I thought that this was a Flow- typa story...with all the references, as you mentioned! This is really the best comment I have received for any of my stories. I am trying to improve my writing and this comment of yours is helping me to do so (+ a certain TedEd video too). Thanks again (for the pic thingie) Um, RANDOM QUESTION TIME As I mentioned, this was a 'Flow' type story. Which genres do you think are YOUR cup of tea, mah darlin'? and which ones are mine, deary Flowy?
Reply
Np, glad I could help :) I like writing fantasy, inspirational, descriptive, and fiction. As for you, I’d say you write great descriptive, contemporary, and Disney stuff lol
Reply
=D Noice... You're good at this!
Reply
Lol what can I say?
Reply
except....You're Welcome!
Reply
🎊 ack I know this one- it's Anthony something, it was a spanish name- Gonzales i think but idk if i spelled it right lol 🎊 I have absolutely no idea lol, i think you're referring to genie but im not 100% sure XDDDD 🎊 I think it was Mulan, but honestly I didn't like the movie it strayed so far from the original TvT and MUSHU WASNT THERE LIKE AKHJCBAUIHCKJABCNI i didnt use google cuz i didnt know if it was allowed, gosh this was hard XDDD
Reply
YEah...+1 That's right, but I want the person who voiced him, originally Yeah, it was. Even I HATED it! So, +2 for you!
Reply
NICE YESSSS ajklchnsackjach gosh uhhh- in the original movie, which i believe is the 1992 one, was voiced by Robin Williams, but honestly I prefer Will Smith in the live action LOL see?! it was HORRIBLE it wasn't even Mulan just another chinese war story- yay!!
Reply
Yeah.... I can write 1000 words for it's 'badness'... Also, new story!
Reply
XDDDD ooo!
Reply
Well done, Dhwani!! The story was so amazing and I loved it so much!! Especially this part: You think upon this more and more, as you begin to see more and more of the moon, coming out of the shadows like Simba, waiting to be crowned the king again! I loved it so much when you did a Disney reference <3!! Loved your Aladdin Fanfic too!! It was pretty awesome!! Hope that Disney would make this a movie <3!! I'll be the first person to watch it if they make this a movie. Who do you think is the best person for playing Lian and Prince Ali? Als...
Reply
Thanks, Ash! Yeah, I mean, there is nothing better than a Disney reference. <3 !!! Um, I have no idea....any actors up for the role? Yeah, I will write it AFTER No Way Home is released...so that it does not 'hamper' the story of my idea.
Reply
I really like this one! This was such a beautiful piece of writing, the flowing was wonderful and I loved your observations! I loved this, just like I loved reading your Aladdin Fanfic. It was amazing! Hoping that Disney would make it into a movie! 👏🏻👏🏻
Reply