Carmen

Shit, I was gonna be late. I couldn't stand being under the fire of her gaze and the weight of her silence again.

"I'm so sorry-" I would start, then stop, knowing it was futile. Her arms crossed, she would sit there seething. Slowly, she would start to open up, only after the food was ordered. Even then she was short with me.

Flowers flashed by my vision and I doubled back. I saw a nice bouquet, grabbed it, and ran to the counter.

"Very lovely choice" smiled the old woman behind the counter, "fifty dollars."

Fifty dollars! I was thinking. But I didn't have time to haggle. If the old bag wanted fifty dollars for these six dying flowers, then so be it. She smiled kindly and bid me good day then I was off again.

I sighed with relief when I reached the front of the restaurant. My watch told me I was only five minutes late. The flowers would provide a good excuse for that.

When I told the head honcho that I had a reservation under "Mullins," he told me no-one was there for it yet. That was a little confusing. She was usually early. Guess the shoe was on the other foot now.

I sat there and waited. One water for me and a diet for her. Diet was her favorite. I couldn't stand the taste of it. Anxiously I glanced about and rubbed my knees while waiting. My watch said she was 10 minutes late. No worries, probably got caught in traffic.

After 20 minutes of waiting, I gave it up. The latest I had ever been was 20 minutes. Well, I guess she was giving me a taste of my own medicine. I scooped the sad flowers off the white tablecloth and made my melancholy way out of the restaurant.

"I'm very sorry sir" the head honcho said as I walked by. I waved him away silently.

The streetlights were coming on. I wondered where she was. I wanted to tell her I was sorry for always being late. Excuse or not, it didn't matter. I should budget my time better.

When I buzzed her apartment, there was no answer. When I tried calling her cell phone there was no answer. She hadn't posted anything on social media. Maybe she was just sleeping. Well, I shouldn't wake her up. I turned and descended the concrete stairs in front of her apartment and made my way home. As I reached the bottom, I heard a voice from above me.

"Oliver!"

I turned and looked up. There she was in all her light skinned beauty, curly hair hanging over one shoulder as she leaned out of the third floor window.

"How does it feel?" she shouted down.

"Not good" I yelled back, "Not good at all." I was using the flowers to shade my eyes against the glare of the streetlight.

"Whatcha got there?" she asked.

I looked at the flowers, then went back to shading my eyes.

"Flowers" I said, "they're for you"

She smiled and moved away from the window. I heard her the door buzz open and I ran up the steps.

A few months after that, she died. Things were going great. We were communicating better. If I knew I was going to be late, I would tell her. She would be upset, but understanding and grateful that I let her know. We were traveling a lot in our free time. Little road trips to beaches and cabins that were only a few hours away. It was the best that we had ever been.

It happened late one night after one of our trips. I was parked in front of her apartment. We grabbed her things from the trunk and I walked her up to the door.

"Are you sure you don't need help bringing this stuff up?" I asked.

"Yes, Ollie, I'm sure" she said, smiling. That beautiful smile. It still made my heart melt.

"I'm helping you anyway"

"Ollie, I'll be fine" she told me.

"Okay" I relented. We pecked a quick goodbye kiss and I sat in my car as she entered the door. She did a small wave and was gone. I put it in drive, smiling to myself. As I checked my mirrors, I heard a loud bang. Confused, I peered into my rearview and saw a hooded man running frantically out of her apartment building. He had a fistful of jewelry in one hand and a gun in the other. Looking up and down the street, he picked my direction to run in. Noticing the running car, he ran to my passengers window. He held the gun up.

"Get out" he said, muffled by the glass. His face was covered by a ski mask and sunglasses. Just as I was about to comply (for the sake of my life), the door of her apartment building banged open and out came a guy who leveled a shotgun at the robber. Perched on the front steps, he took aim. The robber looked over when the door had loudly opened and before he had time to react to what was happening, another loud bang rang out and he was splayed on the pavement.

I was breathing heavily. "Holy shit" I said out loud. The shotgun man came up and kicked the robber.

"Dead as a doornail" he said, then looked at me. He was an older man, but nimble, "You got a phone?" he asked. I nodded. "Call an ambulance."

"I thought you said he was dead?"

"He's dead, but the girl on the stairs is still breathing"

Panic took over. I dialed 911 and quickly got out of the car. As the phone rang, I ran up the front steps. The door was still open and there she was, her shirt covered in blood. Her luggage had fallen all over the stairs and entryway.

"CARMEN!" I screamed and knelt beside her. Distantly, the operator was asking what the emergency was. The tears started coming down as I held her there. I didn't care about the blood staining my hands and clothes. It was her blood.

The old man came in and found my phone. Whatever he was saying to the operator, I didn't catch. All I could focus on was her. Somewhere deep down, though I didn't want to accept it, I knew she would die.

The pronounced her dead on arrival. I was torn up inside. I didn't;t eat for a long time. Every time I walked by restaurants we had eaten at, tears welled in my eyes. The memories came up in my phone and there she was, alive and radiant, smiling on top of a mountain. It wasn't fair.

She was buried not too far from my apartment. It was my day off. The sky blue sea was empty of any cloudy vessels. The sun's eye shined down as I stood over her grave. It was a day like this that we would've taken one of our trips. I held a bouquet of flowers. The old lady was grateful again. I don't remember the price. It didn't matter anymore. I laid down the bouquet on her grave. I'll love you forever Carmen.