I'm so much more

The wind blows Dove’s black hair into her face as she stands on the sidewalk with a clipboard in her hand, attempting to save me. “Sir.” She flashes a young man holding a briefcase a smile. “Will you sign my petition?”

He checks his watch and scowls at her. “What’s it for?”

“A big developer wants to tear down this apartment building. I’m petitioning the city to turn it into a historic landmark.”

He shakes his head. “It's just a building. It's nothing more than a tin roof and bricks. The city's full of them.”

But I'm more than that.

I'm the only home little Lindsey in 4C has ever known. I'm where she was conceived. I’m where she was born during the city-wide blackout of two thousand eighteen. I'm where all her milestones have taken place. Where she took her first steps. Where she spoke her first words. Where she lost her first tooth. Every picture her mother has of her was taken within my walls. To Lindsey, I'm not just a building, I'm home. 

I'm the place, Matthew, in 3D landed when his parents kicked him out on his eighteenth birthday. In this city full of apartment buildings, I'm the only place he could afford on a fast-food worker's salary. I might not have a working elevator, but he never seemed to care, because it was my tin roof that kept him dry. To Matthew, I'm not just a building, I'm a shelter. What will happen to him when I'm gone? Where will he go?

It was under my tin roof that, Jack, from 2A met the love of his life, Heather, from 2B. I witnessed them flirting in the mailroom for months before she finally got up the courage to ask him out. Their first date took place within my brick walls as they watched Lady and the Tramp and ate spaghetti she ordered from the Italian restaurant down the street, but claimed she made. 

Once they got married they could have chosen to live in any building in this city, but they stayed here, with me. They moved upstairs into a bigger apartment. No longer Jack from 2A and Heather from 2B, but now the Gibsons in 6G. I witnessed Heather's heart shatter into a million little pieces when she miscarried at three months and I witnessed Jack's melt when they carried little Liam through the door. To them I’m not just a building, I’m part of their love story.

Dove’s smile fades as she watches the man with the briefcase walk away. As she lets out a sigh, the building inspector walks out my front doors. “What’s the verdict?”

“It's not safe. The sprinkler system isn't up to code.”

Not safe?

How could they call me not safe when I'm the safest place, Savannah, in 1B has ever been. I was here for her when she was bullied in school for being different. I heard her tears echo against my brick walls every night as she cried herself asleep. I remember the day she came out to her parents. The day she told them she was born in the wrong body. I can still see the joy on her face when they accepted her for who she is as she introduced herself to them with her chosen name. Even when Savannah didn't feel safe being herself in the world, she always felt safe being herself inside me.

How could they call me unsafe when it was my brick walls the, Kravchuk family in 5E, took refuge in after immigrating to this country. I protected them as they adjusted to their new reality. I sheltered Masha as tears ran down her face while video chatting with her friends still stuck in Ukraine. I safeguarded Igor from the ignorant you should speak the language before moving to a new country people while he struggled to learn English. I rooted for Olena as she experienced the culture shock of her first day in an American school. To the Igor, Masha, and Olena I’m not unsafe, to them I’m a sanctuary, a second chance, a safe place to rest while their country is being destroyed by war.

“The sprinkler system?”

“Among a dozen other things.”

Dove pinches the bridge of her nose. “How much will it cost to fix everything?”

The man adjusts his glasses and glances over his paperwork. “Let’s just say the repairs will cost you more than what the buyers are willing to pay you for it. You have three options. Sell it like they want or cough up the money to fix it, but I’m guessing you don’t have that." He clicks his pen and steps off of the sidewalk onto the crosswalk.

“Wait, you said I have three options.”

“Oh.” He steps back onto the sidewalk. “Or you could do neither and let the city shut you down. As soon as they see my report they’ll notify you that the building isn’t safe to live in. You’ll still own it. It’ll still be here, but you won’t be making any profit off it. And when you finally do decide to sell it, the buyer’s offer will come way down.”

The building inspector crosses the street and Dove slumps down on my stoop. Hours go by but the collection of signatures doesn’t increase. 

“Sir,” Dove says as a man in a dark gray suit approaches. “Will you sign my petition to turn this charming building into a historic landmark and help save it from being demolished?”

The man chuckles as he runs a hand across his slicked-back hair. “You must be the owner, Ms. Ross.” 

“How do you know my name?”

“I’m Marcus Miller. I’m the contractor for the new skyrise that’s going up once your little apartment building is torn down.”

Dove crosses her arms over her chest. “I’m not selling.”

Mr. Miller laughs. “Why not? I’ve seen the offer the buyer made you, it could change your life.”

“This building has been in my family since it was built.”

“And when, may I ask, was that?”

“Nineteen o’ two.”

He shakes his head. “It’s too old. We’ll replace it with something modern.”

Too old?

Are the pyramids in Egypt too old? Is the Roman Colosseum too old? Those buildings are older than me, but no one wants to tear them down. There’s no talk of bulldozing them to the ground. At least I serve a purpose. I’m a home to little Lindsey in 4C, a shelter to Matthew in 3D, a part of the Gibsons’ love story in 6G, a safe place for Savannah in 1B, and a second chance for the Kravchuk family in 5E. I might not generate as much money for the City of Chicago as the “historic landmarks” do for theirs, but modern isn’t always better. Change isn’t always needed.

A Cook County school bus stops in front of me and Lindsey, Liam, and Olena rush off. 

“Mommy,” Lindsey calls out as she clings to Dove's leg. “Can I show Liam the new lego set you got me?”

Dove’s eyes flick back and forth from Lindsey to the contractor who wants to tear me down. “Of course sweetie.”

“Ms. Ross.” Olena taps on Dove’s elbow as they climb my sturdy stairs. “My mom says we’re all going to have to move soon. Is that true?”

“Move?” Lindsey wraps her arms around Liam. “Will I still get to see Liam every day?”

“Sweetie I don’t know.”

Tears rim Lindsey’s brown eyes as she flings my front door open and runs down my hall.

“Wait for me,” Liam yells as he sprints after her, his spiderman backpack bouncing up and down on his back.

Dove sighs as she sinks onto my stoop once more. “Olena, I promise I will do everything I can to make sure that doesn't happen."

* * *

It's been three months since Dove made her promise to Olena, but even though she did everything she could it wasn't enough to save me. They say eyes are the windows to the soul, but what are my windows? If eyes can shed tears, then why can't my windows do the same?

A man in a bulldozer stares at me like a wolf ready to devour a sheep as the deadly machine roars to life and I know this is the end. I will never get to see Lindsey grow up like her mother and the rest of her family before her. I'll never learn if she and Liam fall in love in my mailroom like his parents did.

A wrecking ball crashes through the window of 3F and loose bricks fall to the ground, crumbling into dust.