Too-Cute Twin Talk

Too-Cute Twin Talk

“Shush. Did you hear that?”

“Huh? What? You waking me up again? Isn't it enough you always have an elbow in my ear? How am I supposed to hear anything? That sound is always there. Shush, shush, shush. It lures me to sleep.”

“This time it's more than that. Now listen real hard.”

“Thump. Thumpity thump. Thump. Thumpity thump. That one is constant, too. Now leave me alone. And there is no room to change position. Stay where you are. Ow! You're always kicking me in the worse places.”

“This is the only place we have ever been. Not my fault you are getting so fat we don't have any room any more. Now pay attention.”

“I'm too poor to pay attention.”

“Very funny. Where's your funny bone? I'll give it a good whack to give you something to laugh about. Can't you please listen to me? Someone is talking.”

“Yeah. So what? We've gotten used to these two long time ago. Light floating voice close by and deep baritone cuddling up close making the other one giggle and laugh. Makes me seasick jiggling around. Not the same at all when the light one is swaying gently humming pretty tunes. That makes me feel all cocooned and loved. Arms wrap around us to protect us. That's a nice feeling.”

“Remember when they used to call us their little jelly bean? Then it was nugget. Then peanut...”

“Yeah. So what?”

“Well, now I think they are making up new names.”

“What do you mean?”

“I don't know. Like grown up names. That's why I want you to help me listen. This might mean something important all of our lives. So hush now and help me understand what they say.”

Wah, wah, wah, wah, wah.

“That was the deep one. He says it has to be boys' names.”

“You think that means we're boys.”

“Well, look between your legs and what do you see?”

“My eyes aren't open yet. I can't see anything. Can you?”

“Nah. Come here a little closer. Let me feel around.”

“What are you feeling for?”

“How should I know.”

“Let's just assume we are boys, okay?”

Wah, wah, wah, wah, wah.

“Did you like any of those names?”

“Repeat them again, please.”

“Mr. Baritone said, “What do you think about reusing our father's names.”

“Don't they need them anymore? How would that work out?”

“How should I know how it works?”

“You're the smart one. I'm the sleepy one.”

Wah~wah~wah~wah

“Ooo. That's the light pretty voice. I like it a lot.”

“What did it say? What it say?”

“Wants them to be strong manly names like their father.”

“What does 'father' mean?”

“My guess, mind you it's only a guess, it means the baritone voice because it sounds strong.”

“So we could call that voice 'Father'?”

“Sure, why not until we have something better.”

“Don't think much could be better than that unless it is the pretty voice.”

“Maybe sometime we'll find out.”

“Ouch! That kick really hurt! Why you do that? I'm listening and paying attention like you asked.”

“That wasn't me. I didn't move.”

“Then what...? Oomph! There it is again. Feels like someone is putting a big squeeze on us.”

Wah~Wah~WAH

“The light voice is very excited now.”

WAH-WAH-WAH

“The Father voice, too.”

“Wonder what's happening? I think we are on the move. Hang on away we go.”

Thumpity Thump Thump. Thumpity Thump Thump. Swush-swush-swush. Thump Swush. Thump Swush. Thump Swush.

“I hear even more voices around us. I can't recognize all of them. But I'm sure they are talking about us.

“What's happening? What's happening? How do you know they are talking about us?”

“Trust me.”

shush- shush-shush thump thump thump

“Ah, see? That's better. All calmed down again. Maybe we can both get some sleep.”

“Wait! Why has everything gotten brighter? This has never happened before. And where do you think you are going? You can't leave me. We are like two peas in a pod. I'll be lost without you. Why are you screaming so loudly. Wailing your head off!

“What? Why? Hey! Get your bloody hands off of me. This is my home. I don't want to leave it. It really is cozy even if it was getting a little crowded. I'll have you know... WAAA!WAAA! WAAA!

“Now why am I all alone? I've been laid in this glass enclosure. Its nice and roomy and quite warm but I have itchy bindings on. There are tubes sticking out of me and strange things peering in at me. I even miss that annoying kicker. I do hear that Father voice trying to reassure me, though. If I understand correctly I think I hear him say my twin is right next to me in another glass box. We've been weighed and measured and are quite tiny as newborns go, but, boy, was the other guy a fatty always taking more than his share of the space. Wonder if I'll ever see him again. He really wasn't all that bad.”

“I sure miss the thumpity thumps and the light voice. All these others are so strange. Where is that sleepy partner of mine? He'll be freaking out. No one ever told us this would happen. Not sure what this is exactly. Been poked and prodded and ooed and ahed over. All these people are still talking about us. Wonder what surprises will come next? Oh, but there is that Father voice.”

“Thank you, Doctors.”

“Everything went exceptionally well, Mr Koolridge.”

“My wife, Chrissy, will be so proud when she wakes up. Can't wait to get to hold them. I know I can't express how happy I am to be the father of these two identical bouncing boys. They both have a set of lungs on them. Am I right? Huh, names? We were just discussing that when she started feeling labor pains and thought we had better get in here for the cesarean even though it was a little premature.”