10/27/21 - 9:11 am

Written in response to: Write about a missing person nobody seems to know or remember.... view prompt

55 comments

Sad

At this point, I feel like if somebody hugged me long enough I would break down and cry my eyes out. If somebody just looked me in the eye everytime I said I was OK and told me "No you're not and that's ok" I would break down. I feel like I'm on a verge of a breakdown every single day. My days are getting worse and worse. I'm losing people in my life that I never wanted to lose. I'm being put in situations that I don't know how to handle. And it's getting overwhelming. I've almost cried I don't know how many times in class and I had to keep telling myself to hold it together. And everytime I get home I try to cry and let it out but nothing comes. Telling myself that I don't have to be strong isn't enough and it isn't helping. I feel rage and I'm angry and I'm sad and I just want to cry. But I can't.ย 


Yesterday, I was walking to class and this man just came out and said "hang in there" to me. He had no idea how much I needed to hear that. He had no idea that I wish I had people who would tell me that everyday. "Hang in there", "it's ok", "you don't have to keep holding your feelings in"... Because telling myself that makes it seem like a chore. I have to keep reassuring myself that I am enough because no one else will. I've had people walk into my life who said it at one point, but now I don't even know where they are anymore. So many friendships and relationships that I held dear to my heart gone because something wasn't working and we couldn't fix it. And those same people are the people who actually brightened my day when they spoke to me, when they looked at me, when they smiled and waved at me. And now they're gone my days are becoming more and more unbearable.ย 


Music helps sometimes. It gets my mind off of whatever problem life throws at me. But it doesn't help for long. Soon the lyrics start to have meaning and I think about whatever the problem is and I get sad all over again. If only people knew how much emotion I hold back everyday. If only people knew the face I put on everyday just to make it seem like I'm ok. But really... I'm not. And I'm dying BC the one person I want to talk to, the one person who might understand won't listen. It's funny how all I wanted, all I asked God for, was peace and he gave me turmoil instead. He gave me friendships that should've never lasted, relationships with people I should've never met, and agony with close bonds that broke because of one small incident. I just. Want. Peace and quiet. From all this. Mess.ย 

October 27, 2021 14:18

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55 comments

Akshara .
05:46 Nov 16, 2021

Started a new thread! :)

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15:11 Nov 16, 2021

OMG!! I LOVE IT!! For some reason - not odd bc ik you can write wonderfully, but great - I was just pulled in and I couldnt stop reading it. Also with my OCD I couldnt help but notice some grammar and punctuation issues. But those can be easily fixed๐Ÿ˜Š I would LOVVVVEEE to write a part 2 for the story. How should I continue or should I just go how I feel is best at the ceremony. OMG OMG OMG I just had a great idea. WHAT IF... I wrote the story from beginning to end with Emerald queen and she was thinking back to what happened at the ceremony...

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15:13 Nov 16, 2021

Story Titles: -- Emerald Queen -- When Queendom Collides -- Queen Struggles (well this is a little more modern) -- Tired As a Queen -- ??

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Akshara .
05:06 Nov 17, 2021

eh, we need something more catching. no offense. :D Something that will pull the reader in the moment they read the title. ๐Ÿ’• But I do like "Emerald queen" but i think we could brainstorm more. But OH MY GOD!! No-reader will expect that ending!! YES, please write! ๐Ÿ˜Š Also, when you're done writing, share it with me in google docs again? :)

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Akshara .
08:21 Nov 17, 2021

When do you think you will be done writing? ~XD

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14:44 Nov 17, 2021

I meant to say from end to beginning not beginning to end but YAYAY!!!! I will sure do! I'm going to start writing today but I probably won't finish it until the end of the week because of school๐Ÿ˜ฎโ€๐Ÿ’จ

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Akshara .
02:35 Nov 18, 2021

oop- I expected you would finish in 2 days or something, but sure. Just comment on one of my stories when you're done writing! I hope school is going well for you-right?

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Dhwani Jain
12:38 Nov 15, 2021

Hello all! https://wp.me/pd3y1A-fD Please check out my latest post, THE VIRUS, YOU AND ME, a podcast. I hope you all enjoy it as much as I did writing it! Dhwani Jain Dream DJ {https://djdhwanijain.wordpress.com/}

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Kendall Defoe
01:29 Nov 12, 2021

Feel like sending you a digital hug right now...

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20:22 Nov 12, 2021

๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’• *receiving hugs*

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Awe hunnnnn, it's okay not to be fine! It's okay to cry, and it's okay to feel emotions. Your worthy, your enough, and your all I, and the other writers of Reedsy, will ever need. Your strong, you got this, I believe in you <3 stay amazing ๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’• *sends all the love and screen hugs and platonic forehead kisses I can*

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15:50 Nov 04, 2021

๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’•tyyyy

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๐Ÿช This story was so deep and so frickin true- The descriptions of what the main character was going through was on point, and I DEFINITELY think that saying "It'll be ok" or something supportive is super underrated. This was super powerful and inspiring <3

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16:06 Nov 02, 2021

Thank you so much!! Actually this was more of a personal entry of mine rather than a story but I purposefully didn't include any specific details about myself. Thank you so much for understanding and liking it๐Ÿ’•

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Np! Aww I hope everything goes well! If no one's told you yet: "It'll be ok" :D Praying for you <3

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15:51 Nov 04, 2021

๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’•tyyy!!!

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yw hope everything gets better soon ๐Ÿ’ž๐Ÿ’ž

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Akshara .
16:46 Oct 29, 2021

Collaboration? ๐Ÿ’• *Nervously looks at the screen*

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18:30 Oct 29, 2021

YESSSS! Lmk what you're thinking

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Akshara .
16:39 Nov 01, 2021

Sorry, I accidently deleted our comment. ๐Ÿ’• Would you like to do a sad story, Carla? :)

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18:25 Nov 01, 2021

It doesn't matter. I've been told I'm good at building emotion and dialogue but my happy stories don't have as much impact as my sad stories do. If we are doing a pov sad story I think we should make it where the characters are really really close like childhood bsf or bf and gf

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Akshara .
05:53 Nov 02, 2021

I think you're good at writing them both though! ๐Ÿ’ซ Well anyways, I have a story idea that matches what you said... ...The father of a 7-year old girl, (lets call her Carla) becomes mayor of the town and decides to move. When they do, they meet their neighbors who have twins (a boy and a girl) who are the same age as Carla. And soon, they become best friends. :) Then, the neighbors get divorced and the twin boy moves away with his mother without letting Carla know, while the twin girl stays with her father. A few years later, while Carla is i...

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Missa .
12:27 Nov 02, 2021

It's a wonderful idea. I would love to read it!

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16:10 Nov 02, 2021

Oh my gosh!! Thr twist at the end is so unexpected. I think the only thing I would say is this story would have to be split into more than just 2 povs and 2 parts. I think it would have to be suspenseful enough to try to get more ppl to read it which means maybe more than 2 posts. I think its a good idea though. Which pov are you trying to do, the boy twin, girl twin, or Carla (I think we should change her name as well to something more modern like Ravyn or something idk)

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20:23 Nov 12, 2021

Sure we can. If you don't have time to write the story at all thts also fine with me๐Ÿ˜Š

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Akshara .
07:06 Nov 13, 2021

No, no, I'd love to write with you!! :) I have a story idea, but it has two parts, I'll do part one and can you do part two? :) This story is about a princess, soon to be queen. The story is told through dialogue, between the princess and her maid. The maid tried to convince the princess to become the queen, while the princess talks about how her mother was a slave and married the king when they fell in love, and that's why the people in the kingdom don't want the princess to become queen, is part one that I'm gonna write. And part two will ...

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Akshara .
11:26 Nov 13, 2021

How about I write part one first, and then share it with you, so you can understand better about the plot and write part two? :)

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Akshara .
11:54 Nov 13, 2021

Hii!! I'm done writing part one!! :)

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14:38 Nov 15, 2021

Yeeesss Im cool with that!! You can share it with me and I'll start writing part 2. Have you published it to Reedsy yet? Hold on lemme see....

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Akshara .
11:06 Nov 25, 2021

heyy carla! I โ€‹hope you're doing well. can you please read my new story? :)

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16:24 Nov 29, 2021

Ofc I can!!!

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