Good Friendship Never Dies

The ravages of time affect us all. There have been lots of times when I’ve seen someone from the past and thought how old they look, and then I’ve realised that when I look in the mirror, I look just as bad!

Walking through the park I crunch on the crinkled dry leaves and think that my arms look a bit like them. High above me, hanging from a branch are new leaves, soft and supple. I just sigh.

When Susan and I first met it was in Primary school. From the minute she smiled at me, warmth radiating from her face, I liked her. “Hello” she said to me in a sweet voice, “If you need to know anything just ask me”.

From then on, we were friends. She seemed to skip wherever she went, as if her legs had springs in them, and her light blue eyes sparkled when she smiled.

She made me laugh, all the time! “Who am I?” she would ask impersonating one of the teachers. She bent over and messed all her hair up, stood up and pulled her ears away from her head and with a high-pitched voice said “Today my lovelies, (cough, cough), we will be talking about the days of the Indian trade” and then she would sniff really loudly and roll her eyes back….

“It’s Mr Wrightson” the class would call out, laughing and then as the door opened Susan would run back to her seat and be sitting upright and ready for the lesson to begin, just as Mr. Wrightson walked in….and sniffed!

We had some fun growing up together.

I sat down on a bench and remembering my last reiki class I looked over the right, not moving my head but with my eyes only. Linda the tall, skinny and very supple teacher had explained that to bring back past memories, we must look at the right and concentrate. When she first explained what this was supposed to do I actually thought it might be a load of old rubbish – I had only joined the class and it was all new to me.

I had gone with my friend Jill because she had recently broken up with her very nerdy boyfriend Charles and really needed to get out and mix again with other people. “Ok I’ll come with you” I told her, “I don’t want to get too involved with all that reiki stuff, so as soon as you’re comfortable on your own, I’m off!”

Jill had agreed but after going for only three weeks, she got back with Charles (despite protestations from lots of friends) and told me she had joined a debating club to get more involved with things Charles enjoyed! “But what about the things you enjoy?” I asked her. “Nah, reiki’s not for me”

So here I was practising my reiki in the park. I had really gotten into it and here I was over a year after joining!

The soulful melody of a bird up above somewhere broke the silence and my concentration, and as the sound was shrill and sweet it took me back to choir days. All through primary school we sang together. Of course, Susan had a much better voice than mine but when you’re that young, it doesn’t matter so much what you sound like, just that you ‘give it a go’ and ‘enjoy yourself’.

Even somewhere as serious as school assemblies, where the choir stood up to sing the National Anthem and then the school song, Susan could make us laugh. “Someone had baked beans for breakfast I think!” she said to me out of the side of her mouth “Who do you think?”

I tried to ignore her but couldn’t. “Who I asked?”

“Flora, I heard her. I thought it was a mouse squeaking but when I looked at her satisfied face, I knew!”

That comment was too much for me and I put my hand over my mouth to stop the laughter. I wasn’t doing a very good job of it because Mrs. Spiers gave me a death stare, which said ‘If you dare to laugh one more time, you’re in trouble!’ and it froze the smile solidly on my face.

My mind meandered and took me to school sports days – warmth, lots of colour, excitement and shouting children. Susan and I were both quite good at running and as we were in the same faction, we were also in a lot of races together.

She was always the champion girl at the end of the day and I was the runner up. Deep down inside of me I wished that for once it was the other way around, and I know that Susan wouldn’t even mind – in fact she was the kind of girl who although gifted in so many areas, never made out she was anything special.

If a mistake had been made and there was an extra runner in the relays, Susan would always put her hand up to miss to let someone else have a go, but to me the relays were the most fun so I never wanted to put my hand up.

Our final year, in grade six will always be a special memory in my mind _ the year we began to grow up! The pupae were ready to  change, to experience some life..

Even our boy radars began to work and those that we hated to even hold hands with a couple of years earlier, we smiled at hoping they would notice us. We would chat in the playground, flirting with high pitched giggles and over dramatized hand movements!

We didn’t go to the same High school but we always stayed in touch. That is until we were in our twenties.

Susan wanted to be the magnificent butterfly and spread her wings, view as much of the world as possible through her positive and happy lenses, and so she did.

I on the other hand didn’t have the personality or ‘get up and go’ that Susan did. Being such a nice friend when we were younger, she would never say how boring she found my life, but I knew she did.

When we got our first jobs, mine was the expected secretary in a big office while Susan got herself the perfect position for her – a Personal Assistant to one of the biggest recorder producers around. She loved it and I quite often saw her name in the paper – usually in the ‘social pages’.

When I met my future husband Susan was seemingly very happy for me but in the card she wrote it simply said ‘I hope you and David are very happy but I hope more it is what you want’….

After David and I got married, Susan went overseas. Our lives were polar opposites. She was always the kind friend to me and we never lost touch completely but if we were winding roads, Susan went around the mountain quickly, reaching the summit in no time, and I slowly trudged a straight road with plenty of stumbling along the way, and looking back after a few years, my road had been slowly going downhill.

I still had about twenty minutes until Susan was due to meet me. I had seen her twice since we were in our twenties. Once when she came back for her mother’s funeral and the other time was for David’s funeral. At the wake Susan had asked me if I would like to come overseas when I felt strong enough emotionally. I said I would think about it, but even with the constant pleading with me to just visit her, I never went.

I did miss Susan. She had a vitality and a love of life that was catching when around her. When she wrote to me the pages seemed to come alive. I could feel the energy through my fingers as I held the paper, reading the vivid descriptions of what she did at the weekends, the foods she ate. One time when she described a dance she had been at, I was sure the lines under the writing were moving around!

I would ask myself if I was content with the simple things in life, or in a rut? Whatever the answer, and I didn’t know what that was, I just continued doing the same things day in and day out. I wasn’t bored and I wasn’t lonely so to me that was good enough.

A rush of verve coursed through me and as I looked up, I saw her. Susan. Even after all these years I would know her anywhere. She spotted me too and ran, arms outstretched, enveloped me in them and hugged me tight.

After a while we separated and looked at each other. Susan didn’t look old, just more mature, but I knew I looked old.

“It is so good to be near you again” she said to me, wiping away a tear.

“Oh yes, it is. You look fantastic Susan, so well.”.

“We’re not going to worry about what we look like! We need to find a café that doesn’t shut for a few hours and just talk. Shall we put my cases in your car Viv?”

“Let’s just go back to mine, after all you will be staying with me”.

We chatted and laughed all night. The laughter was what I missed the most. I had friends but they weren’t like Susan – not funny and slightly irreverent. In a way, most of the people I mixed with were quite serious.

“What about Mr. Wrightson then” Susan said as we had our second drink. She stood up on the dining room table and mimicked him, and it was just like we were back in the classroom. I was rolling around on the carpet and telling Susan to ‘please stop or I’ll wet myself!”

It took us just over four hours to travel through about forty-five years. Our mouths were dry from talking and tears of both happiness and sadness at times, rolled down our cheeks. Susan and I had lived very different lives after she went away but it didn’t seem as if one of us had lived a better life than the other on, we had just had different experiences. I thought I would feel slightly envious of her lifestyle but I didn’t and I knew for sure she wasn’t envious of mine!

The two weeks she was at my house were fast paced and lively. I needed to lighten my soul again with mirth and fun and I did. I knew Susan would be going away, life here wasn’t for her, not at the moment anyway. “When I need to slow down and spent all of my hard-earned money on a gentler paced life then I will be back. You will be here for me Susan?” she asked sincerely.

I knew I would. Susan was my best friend. One of the good things about growing older is that you don’t need to ask permission to go away to fill your depleted being with a good dose of fun and laughter…. and then come back again. So that’s what I would be doing.