The Best of Both Worlds

Leo could nearly feel the heat of Charlotte's bulging brown eyes burning holes into the side of his face. She leaned forward ready to attack like a lion to its prey.  He was not going to give her the satisfaction of him looking back at her.

“I don’t understand what the issue is,” Leo picked up the remote and slouched down on the couch. 

“You don’t get what the issue is?” Charlotte’s eyes got bigger.  “You don’t get what the issue is?  I’ll tell you what this issue is.  You have a text on your phone about how great last night was with heart emojis.”

“Yeah, so?”  Leo was flipping through the channels as if his conversation with his wife was about the weather.  “John sent that.”  Leo paused on the football game.  He wasn’t a big NFL fan, but he liked to check the scores for the sake of his fantasy football game.

“John sent you heart emojis?”  Charlotte tilted her head down and looked up at Leo.

“Yeah.  I told you, I was with John last night and he sent me heart emojis.”

Charlotte looked down at Leo.  He looked up at her and then back down at the television changing the channel again.  She paused and then stormed up the stairs each step echoing as she stomped.  She was gone.  This was over.  He could now get back to his lazy Sunday.

But Leo’s eyes glazed over.  His relationship with Charlotte had been over for years.  He wanted his pre Charlotte days back and he finally found a way to do it.  He had the best of both worlds, the sex life of a bachelor and the security blanket he was used to with Charlotte.

It all started when he was approached at a bar by a beautiful blonde.  She approached him.  He had been there with a few friends, John included.  He went to refill his Jack and Coke and was waiting for the bartender to finish with a group of screaming girls who just walked in with penis shaped balloons and one of them, wearing a vail.  It was all too distracting to not watch.

“I feel sorry for the girl getting married,” a woman’s voice came from next to Leo.  Leo spun around to see a leggy blonde beside him.  She was in a leather jacket and a skin tight red dress. She tilted her head and smiled, white teeth behind red lips.

“Oh yeah.  Totally,” Leo gave a tight lipped smile.

“I got a devorce last year.  Marriage was a total waste of time.  Have you ever been married?”

“No, never,” Leo crossed his hands under the bar, slipped his wedding ring off and dropped it into his jean pocket for safe keeping.

“Well, don’t do it.” She put out her hand, “I’m Natasha.”  

Leo took her hand, “Leo.”

“Want to get out of here?” 

It was that easy.  Leo told his friends he was tired and was heading home.  Many of their wives were friends with Charlotte.  He wasn’t about to give away anything to them while he was trying to figure things out with Charlotte.

He saw Natasha regularly for a few weeks, always going to her house and always removing his ring before he saw her.  He didn’t love her.  He could never love her.  That is not what he was after with Natasha.

After Natasha, there was Megan.  Then after Megan was Daniella and Britney.  Two at a time was difficult and decided to break things off with Daniella.  She was nice enough but the sex was pretty vanilla.  He was not after vanilla sex. 

For over a year he kept a revolving door of women.  Charlotte never caught on.  Except once, she noticed he wasn’t wearing his ring.  He told her he took it off to play tennis with John.  But even if she caught on, would he care?  She would never leave him. She didn’t have the balls to leave him.

Bang!  Something hit the front door.  Bang!  Something else hit the front door.  Leo stood up from the couch to see what the commotion was.  He ducked just in time as a suitcase came flying down the staircase and straight at his head.

“Charlotte!  What the fuck?” Now he was the one with bulging eyes. 

“Here is all your shit.  Get the fuck out of my house,” she screamed.

“For getting a text from John?” 

Charlotte raced down the steps, stopping on the last step, inches from Leo’s face.  He could feel her hot breath on his face.  She raised a finger, putting it between their two faces.

“For getting a text with heart emojis.  For removing your wedding ring when I am not around.  For coming home late at night with lipstick smudges on your chest.  For the claw marks.  For the woman’s panties I found in your laundry.  For all of your lies and deceits.”  Charlotte was huffing by now. She had nothing left in her.

“Fine,” Leo said.  “I’ll stay at John’s house tonight and let you cool off.  We can talk about this tomorrow.  You are overreacting.  You are crazy to think I am cheating on you.” Leo collected the items, left out the front door.  

“Crazy bitch,” he said under his breath as he shut the door.  He dumped his belongings into the trunk of his car and climbed into the front seat.  

He sat for a moment.  He fucked up.  He never wanted to end things with Charlotte.  He loved Charlotte.  He loved the life they had created together.  He loved the way she wrinkled her nose when she said “I love you.” He loved the way she always made sure he had a late night snack after she had long gone to bed.  He loved that she took such good care of their three children.  He loved that she clearly hated the pitbull he came home with one day, but she always made sure he was fed and walked.  He loved to watch her butt as she walked away.  He loved the way his heart still jumped a beat when she came towards him. He loved everything about her.

He started the car and took out his phone and sent a text, “Hey Alana!  What are you up to tonight?”