Top Notch Security

I must have the kind of face that people trust because my clients tell me things, things that are better left unsaid. 

               Top-Notch Security is the name of my business. I started the company soon after my wife died because I couldn't face working for some giant corporation. My wife was always encouraging me to use my talents. She believed in me and was an inspiration, even when she was sick and in pain. She and my lovely daughter made my life worthwhile. My wife battled cancer for three years and it finally wore her out. It's been five years and I still miss her.

                Top-Notch Security specializes in all types of security systems for homes and offices. My clients are small business owners and individuals that want to protect their valuables. Some clients want just basic security for their homes. Others are willing to pay a premium price to have the deluxe system with all the bells and whistles. The deluxe system includes an alarm that notifies the police of a break-in.  I do my best to discourage this system because I think it is a waste of the client's money. Ninety-nine percent of the time, the owners activate alarm themselves. It creates work for the police and embarrassment for the client. Against my advice, some customers still choose this option because it makes them feel safer. It will stop the amateur thief,  but a skilled burglar will find a way to circumvent the system.

Two weeks ago, I installed one of these deluxe systems for a gentleman.

 "I carry out a great service for the people in this state. I buy and sell marijuana. Marijuana is legal in our state, but the Federal law has a different opinion. It is still illegal to buy and sell cannabis products and I could face felony charges." My client was a little nervous, but he wanted me to know all the facts. "I'm afraid the feds would confiscate all o my earnings if I keep the money in a Federally insured bank. I have no choice. I must keep all of my profits in my house. I need the deluxe system. "

                I couldn't talk him out of the deluxe system, but I was able to convince him to buy an extra feature. For just another one hundred dollars, he could push a button that would inform the police it was a false alarm. The police wouldn't make an unnecessary trip and marijuana dealer wouldn't be embarrassed. I also sold him a fireproof safe. It arrived directly from the factory.

               He was a great client because he let me install the system at my convenience. This is important because my daughter is an active teenager and I need to be available. She excels in gymnastics, and by that, I mean that she is a superb gymnast.  She plans to try out for Olympics next year and will certainly make the team. Being an Olympic caliber athlete requires a lot of talent and hard work for the gymnast. It also requires a lot of extra time and money for a single father. I was grateful to have a client who was willing to work around my hectic schedule.

 Unfortunately for my client, the Top-Notch Security system didn't prevent him from getting robbed. An unspecified amount of cash was stolen, the dealer wouldn't reveal the exact amount. I would guess the amount was well over one hundred thousand dollars. The police investigated, but they didn't have any clues. The cash was untraceable and there wasn't any other evidence.

                I installed the security system so I was questioned.  "I don't think I can help you find the thief," I told the investigating officer. "I sold and installed the system but I don't know his friends or his enemies." I didn't mention to the police or my client that the safe still had the factory issued combination. It would be easy to open if you were familiar with the model.   

                I would have been the obvious suspect except for my size. I'm six-foot-two inches tall in my bare feet and I weigh three hundred fifty pounds. Some people even call me fat. The safe is located on the third floor. The room is difficult to access because the stairs are narrow and winding. My client is rather thin, skinny actually, and he barely fits between the stair walls. There is a large window in the room, which I used when I installed the safe. The window slides open easily allowing fresh air to enter the house. I used a crane to reach the window and install the safe. No crane was seen on the night of the robbery. Neighbors tend to remember something like a crane. I was ruled out as a suspect.

               Currently, friends and enemies of the marijuana dealers are being questioned. I doubt they will ever find the burglar or the money.

I installed a very basic security system for a very pretentious man last week. He called himself a jewelry broker. "I am known as the best jewelry broker in the state," he told me. "I buy valuable gems and precious metals from all sources, no questions asked. My suppliers usually sent loose gems through the mail or Federal Express. No one is suspicious if things are sent through the mail because only an irresponsible novice would send valuables through the mail. Sometimes  I receive gold or silver that has been melted down and molded into tiny bricks." 

                 I didn't ask any questions because I was happy to have the job and the jewel trader paid very well. My daughter's gymnastic coach is very expensive. He's a well known Russian with a history of coaching gold medal winners. With that kind of reputation, he can name his price, but my daughter is worth it.

               The basic security system consisted of a camera aimed at the front porch. It was mounted high above the door so there wouldn't be any blind spots on the porch. "I like it," the jewelry broker told me. "Most people won't notice they are getting their picture taken. The tiny camera is so far above their heads they won't even see it.!"

                The camera had a switch so it could be turned off manually but to reach it you would need to rappel from the roof. I used twenty-five-foot scaffolding when I installed it.

               "I won't need any more security, even though shipments are often left on my front porch. It looks like I'm just getting something from Amazon or some catalog." He winked at me before he said," My reputation usually prevents anyone from stealing from me. I just need the camera for the occasional fool that dares to steal one of my packages". After testing the camera, my client was satisfied. "I am expecting an exceptionally valuable shipment tomorrow."

               When his shipment of gems was stolen, his satisfaction level dwindled. This wasn't a crime he could report to the police so he came to me. 

               "There was a problem with the camera. It stopped working just as my valuable package was stolen!"

               I checked the camera, "It's working perfectly." I told him. "Did anyone else know how to turn it off?"

 "No!" My client was furious that I might suggest the theft was his fault. "I am the only one who knows how to turn off the camera. . . except you!"

               Then he looked at my size. It's doubtful that I could climb to the roof and it would be impossible for me to rappel down to the camera. Without a doubt, I would fall and leave a large hole on the wooden porch. The switch had been off for three minutes, definitely not enough time to use scaffolding to turn the switch off and back on.

               Calmly, I asked "Do you have any competitors or unhappy suppliers? Is it possible that a supplier has been unhappy with your fee? Is it possible that there are relatives that know more about your business than you realize?" He is currently checking his home for listening devices.

My latest client wanted a camera for his front door and a new safe. I installed the camera slightly below his roof then brought in the new safe.  It was an easy installation because he has an extra-wide front door and the safe is on the ground floor. It went into his game room next to a well-stocked bar. The safe is disguised as a mini-refrigerator. I watched as he reset the combination. The number was easy to remember because it was his address.

               The client put large packets of cash into the safe followed by a journal and some letters. "Lots of people pay me to keep their secrets," he told me. Then he started bragging, "I know secrets about politicians, doctors, lawyers, and celebrities."

               How he makes his money is not my business. I was only concerned with my fee and he paid very well. My daughter wants a designer leotard for the Olympic tryouts and I would like to buy it for her. This might be her only chance to make the gymnastics team and I want to give her every advantage possible.

I wait by our front door as my daughter comes down the stairs from her room. She looks so much like her mother that tears come to my eyes. She's dressed all in black and has black paint on her face.

               "I'm ready to visit the home of your latest client," she tells me. She's carrying a bag full of her rappelling gear.

 My daughter inherited her mother's looks but she inherited my need for excitement. Her gymnastic skills combined with my devious nature make us the best cat burglars in the state.