Wonderful Time of the Year

Lawrence Shafer wakes to the sound of Tony Bennet’s “It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year” on the radio. He winces and covers his ears. His head feels as though it is full of thorns. Lawrence tries to pry open his eyes, but they’re glued shut. Still, Bennet sings.

“Oh, God! What has happened to me? I don’t remember coming home, let alone getting into bed. I last remember being at our office Christmas party and talking to Xiao, the receptionist.”   Lawrence turns to look at the alarm clock and notices how the numbers seem to be floating around. Fearing he’d get a case of the spins, Lawrence hangs his legs over the side of the bed and eases himself up slowly. “Why can’t I remember? I was talking to Xiao when suddenly she looked past me. Her face turned pale, and she seemed about to scream… I-I can’t remember!” Lawrence grinds the hams of his hands into his eyes. “Maybe a shower will help.”

He supports himself with the bedpost and then feels along the wall until he reaches the bathroom. Turning on the shower, he keeps it on the cool side to try and help revive himself. He dries off, puts on his robe, and then turns to the mirror to comb his hair. Seeing his reflection in the mirror, he is stunned. Lawrence’s eyes are red-rimmed, and his cheeks are drawn. His complexion is pale. 

Lawrence shakes his throbbing head and decides to have a coffee. He pushes the button on the Keurig and makes himself a large one. Turning around, Lawrence leans against the counter and surveys his house. The floor plan is open, with the kitchen, dining, and living areas all in one space. He walks over to the white farmer’s table and pulls out the chair he always sits in to view the birds at their feeders. The bright sun makes Lawrence notice that the blinds are amazingly clean. He winces as he takes a sip of the strong coffee and then cocks his head. Suddenly, he freezes.

The sun is streaming in and reflecting on the unmarred table top. And that’s the problem. Lawrence had a cup of coffee once that spilled and left an indelible ring. That ring is not there. As a matter of fact, because the top is made of soft pine, it has many small gouges and pockmarks. Lawrence bends down, practically laying his face on the tabletop, and looks across it. He lightly rubs its surface with his fingertips, trying to feel the imperfections, but finds none.

 Because Lawrence lives alone, he thoroughly cleans the house on the first of every month. It is now after Christmas, and there should be dust on the blinds, but there isn’t. He always works at the table; there should be wear and tear, but there is none! But, most of all, where is the coffee cup stain? He can’t remember the night before! Something is not right!

Lawrence gulps his coffee and wipes his mouth with trembling fingers. “My phone! Where’s my phone?” Lawrence rushes to the corner of the counter, where he always keeps his phone in a basket. He nearly drops it in his haste and stops when he realizes he is panicking. His breathing is short and fast, he is sweating, and his pulse is pounding in his temples. “What is wrong with me?!” Lawrence shouts out loud. Taking a deep breath to calm his nervous, he opens his phone. The message on the screen reads that no connection was found. He checks the battery life and sees it is 80%. He checks the other side of the screen and sees no bars. “That can’t be right. Is the Wifi down?” Then he remembered that as long as the phone had a charge, he could call 911. He rethinks the idea and feels that it might be rash, so he walks to the front door. “I’ll go outside first and get some fresh air to clear my head.” He discovers the door won’t open. He turns the deadbolt, and it still won’t open,   “What the hell is going on ?” Lawrence races down the hallway toward the back bedroom and tries to open the garage door with the same results. That’s when the doorbell rings.

Startled, Lawrence throws his back to the wall and looks up at the small box as it rings again. Lawrence feverously runs back to the living room and stops. He hesitantly continues toward the front door.  His eyebrows knitted together, he stares at the doorknob, afraid to open it. When it rings a third time, Lawrence yanks the door open, startling his lifelong friend and co-worker David Auburn.

Davey steps back. “Geez, Larry! I came by to see how you’re doing and nearly get knocked off the front steps! What’s up?”

Lawrence rests his head against the door jam and chuckles. “Oh man, Davey, am I glad to see you! You have no idea what a horror show this morning has been. Come in.” As Davey steps inside, he looks around but sees nothing unusual. “What do you mean? Is something wrong?”

Lawrence interlocks his fingers behind his head. “Ya, well, I’ve noticed changes around the house that I can’t explain.”

Davey tugs on his earlobe. “What sort of things?’

Lawrence wrings his hands. “Well, for one thing, I woke up not knowing how I got here. My head felt as though I’d been drugged. You know, all spongey and sore. And Tony Bennet was singing a Christmas song on the radio and still is! I mean, it’s like almost an hour later, and he is still singing the same song. No commercial breaks or anything!” Davey looks to the bedroom and leans in that direction. He hears Dean Martin singing, “It’s Beginning to look a lot like Christma.” “It doesn’t sound like he’s singing now. It’s Dean Martin.”

Balling his fist, Lawrence insists, “I swear to God, Davey! It’s been Bennet all morning long! But never mind that. I took a shower to wake up, and afterward, I came out to the kitchen and got a cup of coffee. That’s when I noticed it.”

“Noticed what?”

Lawrence shakes a finger at the windows. “ The blinds! The blinds were perfectly clean!”

Davey squinted his left eye. “And that surprised you?”

“Yes! I mean, I know this sounds ridiculous, but yes. I clean the whole house on the first Sunday of every month. It’s after Christmas, there should be dust! Plus, do you remember that big coffee stain on the kitchen table? Well, it is no longer there. It’s disappeared. The table looks as though it was just delivered yesterday!”

Davey walks over to the table and points. “You mean this stain?”

Lawrence steps back on shaky legs and disrupts a stool. “What? It can’t be. I examined that table from every angle, and the coffee stain disappeared. It was gone, Davey!” Davey protrudes his lower lip and shrugs. “Come see for yourself. And while you’re at it, look at this.” Davey runs his finger along one of the slats and shows Lawrence the dust. “Tell me, Larry. What’s in that coffee cup? A little “Mad Dog 20/20? I came over here this morning because last night at the party, you seemed to be chatting it up with Xiao pretty good, and I thought that perhaps you and she got together after the party, that’s all. I was looking for a little water cooler gossip. Instead, I find my lifelong friend in the middle of a neurotic meltdown!”

Lawrence is mopping sweat off his forehead, but when he hears Davey say that, he becomes angry and grabs Davey by the jacket. “I’m not neurotic! There is something horribly wrong here! Last night at the party, I distinctly remember seeing Xiao’s face filled with fear. She looked like she wanted to scream but couldn’t. She saw something, Davey! What did she see?”

Davey gently removes Lawrence’s hands from his jacket. “She didn’t see anything, Buddy. None of us did. It’s all in your head. Perhaps I should bring you to a doctor or the hospital or something, huh?”   Lawrence pushes Davey away.  “No! You’re wrong! Xiao saw something, and I won’t rest until I find out what it was! I don’t care if you believe me or not!”

Exasperated, Davey demands,  “Okay, Larry! What did Xiao see that none of us saw? That you yourself didn’t even see. What was it, Larry!?!”

“I don’t know!” Lawrence shouts. “Perhaps it was aliens! Aliens that put everyone in a trance or something.” Davey rubs his temples as he questions Lawrence’s theory. “So, about this trance, are you saying you’re the only one of us who feels its effect? Only you, Larry? But the rest of the people at the party feel just fine, is that it?”

“I told you, Davey. I don’t know how this happened, but I won’t rest until I find the truth!” Suddenly, Lawrence feels a piercing pain in his head as his knees buckle. He finds himself on the floor, beginning to lose consciousness.

Then Lawrence hears Davey shout, “What the hell are you doing? You promised not to hurt him!”

A distant voice speaks, “You’ve failed, Mr Auburn. You’ve failed to convince this man that nothing has changed. Everything is normal. Isn’t that what you said you would do?” Davey throws his arms out to his sides, “Well, yes, but I’ve not been with him for more than an hour! You can’t expect me to achieve all that in less than an hour! It’s not possible! It’s not rational!”

The voice continues. “Mr. Auburn, You are aware as to why we need you to make this man feel safe. We want to display him in our science center to show our people how life is on Earth. You’ve failed.”

Davey screams, “Of course I failed, but it’s your fault! You kept messing up the details! You didn’t even completely erase his mind of the night before! What was I supposed to say about that? We had a deal. If I could convince him, you’d let me go!”

“Yes, well, that contract is withdrawn. Goodbye, Mr. Auburn.”

“No! Wait! What are you going to do?”

“We’ll handle it ourselves. Goodbye, Mr. Auburn!

Lawrence hears Davey’s bloodcurdling scream as his entire body begins to convulse and quake. Davey grabs his head as the bloody foam starts flowing from his mouth until, finally, his limp body falls to the floor. Darkness overcomes Lawrence.

                                                              …

Lawrence awakes to the sound of Tony Bennet singing “It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year.” His eyes fill with tears as he feels the icy fingers of dread wrap around his heart. Although terrified, Lawrence forces a smile and hopes to convince whoever they may be that he is unaware of what is happening by saying, “It truly is a wonderful time of the year!”