Death and the moon

I’d never seen anything like it. I examined the instrument. It was smaller than I had expected. I turned to my uncle, uncle Max. “This is it?” 

“Yes, this is it.” He said proudly while putting pieces together and twisting the knobs forward and backward trying to get the telescope in focus. 

“But how are we supposed to see the moon with this? I mean, look at it.” I watched as Max peered through the telescope. 

“Not all telescopes are as big as the ones you see on tv, this one will work just fine.” He began twisting the knobs again. “Ah, there it is! Give ‘er a look.” Max put his hand on my shoulder and nudged me towards the tool. I looked at the telescope, confused. I step away from the instrument. 

“I don’t know how.” 

Max sighed and shook his head. “I’ll show you, it’s easy.” he points to a part of the telescope. “This here is the eyepiece. It’s the piece you… Well, ya’ look through it, and the telescope is gonna make it so you can see things from far away

“Like the moon?”

 Max smiled. “Yes, like the moon.” 

I step back in front of the telescope and look through the eyepiece. I can see the moon. It looks clearer than I expected it too, I didn’t think something so small and old could work this well. I see the moon every day from my bedroom window, The attic window. The moon phases remind me that everything changes even if I feel trapped in the constant cycle of life. Tonight, the moon is full and shines brightly. I admired the moon for a while. 

My uncle Max and I took turns looking through the telescope until it was so late, we could barely keep our eyes open.

“Time to pack up, I've got to get on the road early tomorrow” 

I love it when Max visits us. My father doesn’t have much time for me. It’s okay, I've gotten used to the neglect. Ever since Ma passed away it’s hurt him too much to even look at me. I miss life before the accident. The three of us would go down to the county fair almost every Saturday, we’d try to ride as many roller coasters as we could in a row, first one to get sick loses. There was never a winner. Ma died when I was eight. It’s been four years, but I still miss her every day.

When I woke up the next morning Max had already left, he had to get back to his family in Ohio. I go downstairs to make breakfast for Father and me. I walk into the kitchen and see the telescope sitting in the room. A smile appears on my face as I notice a note taped to it. 

Take good care of her, you deserve it

-Max

I grab an envelope and write a quick thank you letter. I grab my boots and winter coat and run out the front door. The wind is blowing in my face hard as I run down the driveway. I put the letter in the mailbox and run back into the house. I can’t wait to use the telescope again tonight; I wish my father would come outside with me.

It’s finally dark outside. I asked my father earlier today if he wanted to come look at the moon with me, he said he's busy. All I brought with me is the telescope, a flashlight, my coat, and some water. It’s really cold outside tonight and I can barely feel my hands, but I'm determined to see the moon again tonight, I really feel like I need to see it.

I get to the spot where me and Uncle Max had seen the moon the night before. It doesn’t feel quite right. I look around at my surroundings, the trees surrounding me make me feel like I'm suffocating. I feel trapped. I need to go higher. I start walking, shining the flashlight around me trying to find somewhere to go. The moon is shining bright, even brighter than the previous night. I need to get closer to it. I start running. I come across a big hill and stop for a moment to catch my breath. I have no idea where I am but that doesn’t matter to me, I need to get to the moon.

I begin sprinting up the hill. I was out of breath but that didn’t matter to me. I was almost there. I got to the top of the hill. Perfect. Suddenly nothing was in between me and the moon. I set up the telescope, twisting the knobs back and forth like I’d seen uncle max doing the night before. I frantically put the pieces together. Finally, the telescope was assembled. I peered through the eyepiece and saw the moon. It was big and so bright it seemed to be glowing. I was mesmerized. I couldn’t take my eyes off it.

Suddenly the telescope seemed to take control of itself. The knobs were turning all on their own, but I didn’t take my eyes off the moon. The telescope was zooming out and the moon seems to be getting smaller and smaller. Then I see it. A black figure is circling around the moon. I look up from the eyepiece and look at the moon, I don’t see anything strange. I look back through the telescope. The black figure is getting bigger. It's heading straight for me. I look up from the telescope once more and it’s right in front of me. I try to scream as I feel the shadow figure surrounding me, but no sound comes out. Everything is getting colder and colder.

Everything is dark. I can’t see. I can’t feel anything but cold, not even my own body. I can’t smell anything. Everything is silent. Everything except my thoughts. 

I lay there for what feels like years. I’ve calmed down. Am I dead? I can’t tell. I hope this isn’t all death is, Nothingness. 

I sense a presence. Someone or something is here with me. wherever I am, I’m not alone. Then I hear a voice.

“I am death. I am here for you”

I’m not ready to die. I want to argue, say something. I’m only twelve. I want to kick and scream. I need help, I try to scream for my father, but I can’t, and I have wandered too far away from home for anyone to hear me if I could. 

Colors fill my vision. I can see something. I watch as the image comes into focus. 

It’s Ma. 

I’m dead.

  I hear Uncle Max’s voice. 

“Take good care of her, you deserve it.”