Her

I'd give anything to run away with her. Anything to see her hair blowing in the wind on a beach in Hawaii, not a care in the world.

I'd throw away my seven figure job, every pair of designer shoes, this big fancy penthouse for a one way ticket to be with her.

She has no cares... she lets nothing get to her. The clear water runs over her feet daily and she lifts her hands to the sky and thanks the universe it blessed her with another day.

She is free, beautiful, sunkissed and natural. No makeup needed, no thoughts of vanity on her mind. She wakes up and cradles a cup of coffee in her hands as she stares at the ocean from her tiny, stuffy, pretty much empty one bedroom apartment. She spends her nights bartending in a tiny bar making just enough to scrape by. At night after work she lays on the sandy beaches and counts the stars and though shes alone shes never lonely. She never chases love she attracts it. And she is loved, loved by everyone who has the honor of being in her presence. She is not able to buy designer clothes or shoes, instead she bought a cheap sewing kit which shes been using to patch holes in the same three pairs of jeans she took with her when she flew in from the main land.

She is gorgeous. But not just in a physical sense. Yes, she was gorgeous in that way as well. Large brown eyes with flints of gold and green glimmers when the light hits them just right. And hair that's so untamable she spends most of her time clipping it in a loose bun atop her head. Every once in a while she would let her golden locks fall out of the bun and it would hang down to her hips. Waves of gold and brown water falling over her back. Her skin is radiant, glowing from the inside, and smooth like painted porcelain. Her body is a masterpiece. Not perfect. But no masterpiece is. Stretch marks and scars litter her body. Life had left little kisses on her to remind her the past was real. Her hands touched everyone and everything with such grace and gentleness it was as if she'd never been hurt before. But she had, she just decided to let it go a long time ago.

Her heart was truly beautiful. It was ever growing. It had been broken so many times but instead of letting it grow hard and placing a barbed wire fence around it she reminded herself daily that new people, good people, deserved to know the her that existed before she had been hurt.

She was patient and kind. Generous in every way she could be. Complete strangers sit next to her on the beach and ask to vent and she would listen for hours. Her soul was a magnet for people who so desperately needed to heal. She didn't let it get to her. Instead she was grateful to have a purpose so great in this cold world. Light surrounded her everywhere she went and people in the dark saw that. She was the light house leading astray ships into land from the stormy weather. She was the sunrise after the worst night of your life. She was the light at the end of the tunnel. The last ember in a pile of ash that could start a whole new fire if it was touched. She was a reminder to everyone that she came into contact with that goodness in this world did still exist.

God shes just magnificent. Id give anything to run away with her.

I put my feet on the ground, head in my hands. Another day. I looked out of my high rise penthouse overlooking all the buildings in New York. It was so cold and dreary outside. Everyone moved in slow motion. Men and women who didn't want to go home to face their lives. They'd had a bad day at work, just to walk home in the miserable weather, come home to a family they spend far too little time with just to go to sleep and do it all again tomorrow.

I looked around at my LouBoutin shoes, Chanel bags and Hermes scarves. I turned and looked at the floor length mirror and stared at who looked back at me. Who was this person? Id let the world get to me. My eyes were still brown with flints of gold and green in the light but they were cold now. People avoided sitting next to me now. My energy had become one of a beaten down woman who never trusted, never believed, never gave anyone the version of herself that existed before the hurt. I'd let the money take control, I'd let the pain take control. I hated who i saw in that mirror looking back at me. Surrounded by all her stuff. I'd chosen to surround myself with things since people decided i was unfit to open up to anymore. But who can blame them. Id build an impenetrable fortress around my heart and people could see that. They could see it in my eyes, in my skin, hear it in my voice when it shakes when the hard questions come up. Like "how are you doing today." That was the hardest question. All you want to do is weep and say help me. I'm not who i was and i want to run away with her but you cant. I put my hand up to the mirror.

Suddenly there she was. Golden skin, flowing hair, a flower behind her ear, a warm smile.

I'd give anything to be with her. I grabbed a suitcase and packed it with a few pairs of jeans and a couple of my most comfortable shirts... some essentials and looked back at my penthouse.

I'm not going to miss this version of myself. Not when I have her waiting on me.