The Mind Remembers So Little

Well this is odd. I’m not sure where I am or how I got here. It’s pretty dark right now, maybe I can find my way towards some light. I’m pretty sure I just spoke those words, but I can’t even hear myself. What in the world is going on? This is getting a bit terrifying. Let’s see if I can feel any door, wall, or even floor? WAIT! I can’t even feel!?

I try to look around, but no matter how hard I strain, I can’t seem to gain any sort of notion of sight returning. I push my body to feel something, anything, but nothing comes. Am I in some sort of paralyzed state? Am I in a coma? Oh no! I really hope someone can let the dog out. He must be worried sick right now.

Now think! What was I doing right before this? I know I got up this morning. Woke up with a headache and a tightness in my chest, took my medication and went about my day. I forgot completely about my dog and had to turn back to take him out before I left.

What did I do next? I saw something… My keys! I’d almost forgotten to lock the door behind me. Glad I didn’t make that mistake again. It took a whole night of searching to find my dog just so I could get some sleep last night. I left to go do something. Why is this so fuzzy in details right now? I don’t drink or anything.

I’m remembering that I went to the store and got my favorite food. It was something savory, yet sweet. I was eating it as I normally do when I walk through the park. That’s the shortest route I could ever find just to get to work. What is my job? Wow, this is worse than trying to find yourself. I’m trying to remember myself.

There was a tall building covered in glass, with a flagpole out front, and some large hedges along the sides of the entrance. The doors don’t open unless you have the proper authorization. Vocal recognition, fingerprints, retinal scans, the works. I still don’t get why. What do I do that requires so much security?

Was I under dressed for work? Is there a dress code? Can’t be right? I’m a casual person. What was I wearing? For some reason I’m only seeing things in shades of… Why can’t I even think of color names?

Anyways, when I get through the doors, I usually have to go through another security check. What are they checking for? Who knows. Weird scanner. I stand there with my hands above my head for a solid minute while this machine with lights swirls about me. Maybe that’s what’s been causing the headaches.

I feel as though I’m figuring this out! Well, slowly, but at least it’s something. Maybe if I can get through my day I’ll have it all figured out and I’ll wake up from this nightmare. I’m assuming this is a dream.

Okay, so I get through security and head to the elevators. I do remember the buttons were designed to resemble honeycomb. I love to stare at it when I get in. Don’t know how long I stare, but I never recall pressing any buttons and exit onto my floor. What floor am I on?

Do I recall any windows close by to look out? Maybe in the room where I work? It seems as though when I look at where I need to go, I’m taking one step forward and two steps back. Why am I not getting anywhere with this? Do I need to retrace any steps? Am I forgetting something?

Whatever it is, must not have been too important; I’m in a room now. What is this room I’m remembering though? It’s filled with glass and metal objects. Is it a storage room? An office?

I remember something catching the corner of my eye with the first break of light coming through a window. I know why I don’t know what floor I’m on! I’m afraid of heights! Oh crap! What floor am I on?! Never mind, what caught my eye? A liquid in a glass container. I’m in a laboratory!

Finally a breakthrough! I work in a lab! What do I do though? What am I researching? Why do so many of the vials and beakers have warning placards placed around them? I’m getting a bad feeling about this.

If I can’t remember where I am now or how I got here, and I work in a lab… Did something happen to me? Did I mix the wrong chemicals? Did I get exposed to something?

Wait, I remember closing a lab grade refrigerator door, then seeing the beehive buttons again. Back through the security checkpoint with the weird scanner, then into the park. There’s a taco vendor! I remember I get extra pico de gallo.

Why have I not remembered any people or animals about? I can only recall my dog, but can’t even say what breed or color. I really need to focus now on people. Maybe I was with someone? A group perhaps?

Think, think, think!

There’s a shape of someone next to me. Who are they? Friend? Colleague? All I can get is a blur of a person. They’re waving me back to the building.

Now it’s the beehive buttons again! Why is one of them red… And that sound! Agh! What is that sound?! It’s head piercing and ear ringing. My head is throbbing. What is going on?

Beep…

What was that?

Beep…

Why am I feeling cold?

Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeep.

Well, shit, I just died, didn’t I.

Look, there’s the company paramedics around my body. Wait! I’m a researcher! They aren’t going to try to revive me?! I haven’t been exposed to too many unknown chemicals in the lab. I want to live! Please bring me back! I finally figured out the cure!