The Wind in the Willows

You could hear the voices of children playing outside, their shouts and giggles. The flowers in the garden were slowly blooming. Soon it was going to be full of colours. The butterflies started to visit the garden which once was full of magic and laughter. Now the only voice filling the garden was the song of birds who were building nests. Everything and everyone were full of life and excitement. Well, maybe not everyone. It was certain the owner of that beautiful garden was not thrilled about the arrival of the spring. She never was if you listened to the neighbours. They would tell you that she was a grumpy old lady who did not smile once. Some would even dare to say she is a witch who eats children and sacrifices animals. Many were afraid of her and ones who were not, hated her. After all, she wasn't the best neighbour or the friendliest person. The fact that her lovely granddaughter living there with her did not help the case. People believed she was keeping the poor girl as a prisoner there. This charming owner of the house and garden had a name of course. It was Birgitta. Even if she sounds and seems like a horrible person you know what they say never judge a book by its cover.

Birgitta was sitting at her study ignoring the joy spring brought to people and nature since it no longer brings her any joy. She was feeling like her heart was frozen and it had been that way for too long that nothing could melt it anymore. She made her peace with it and accepted she would live in an endless winter. Unfortunately for her, her granddaughter refused to let her be. Her sweet Katja wants to see her once-loving grandma happy again. Birgitta loved her very dearly but even that love was not enough to melt her frozen heart. As she was thinking about these. Katja knocked on the door and entered without waiting for an answer cause she knew her grandma would tell her to leave her alone. Then she walked toward the windows and drew the curtains to let some sunshine get into the depressive room.

“It’s a beautiful day today. Don’t you want to feel the sun, mormor?” Asked Katja. She always called her “Mormor” which was the only word she knew in Norwegian. And it broke Birgitta's heart even more cause it reminded her of the past, of him.

Birgitta sighed and answered, “I would have drawn the curtains myself if I wanted that.”

“Don’t be so grumpy. Why don’t we go and sit under the willow tree like we used to?”

She half-heartedly smiled at that and said, “Thanks for the offer and for thinking about me but my dear I don’t feel like going out.” Then she turned her back to Katja and expected her to leave like she always did.

Katja couldn’t understand what bothered her grandma. She changed after a while. That loving and caring grandma she knew was now an empty shell of what she used to be. But no matter how hard she tried Katja never found the reason why. It couldn’t be her grandfather's passing away even then Birgitta was still full of life despite the grief. She asked her mother once despite knowing how their relationship was complicated, but she brushed it off as getting old and being lonely after her grandfather's death. But Katja believed her mother knew what was it, cause she had the same expression as her grandma had right now. She was walking towards the door but then she decided to ask the question that haunted her for years. “Why are you so upset Mormor? What happened that caused you to be like this?”

This question caught Birgitta off guard. Her mouth opened and closed but nothing came out. When she found her voice she answered, “I don’t want to talk about it.”

“But we have to. I had the best memories in this house and garden with you. You loved that garden and Willow tree, but now you neglect it completely. I don’t understand what changed and I want to know it.”

“Well, all of us want something but we don’t always get what we want now, do we? Look, my sweet Katja, I love you dearly, but I no longer have it in my heart to be that loving woman you remember nor to take care of that garden. And that Willow tree reminds me of nothing but heartache. That’s all I can tell you.”

This answer piqued Katja’s interest but she did not want to push her grandma more cause she could see in her eyes how much it hurt her. But she asked, “Will you ever tell me what happened?”

Birgitta thought about it for a moment before answering her. Could she talk about it? She did her best to forget everything that happened because it was too much for her heart to bear. How could she tell her about that horrible day? How could she tell there is a truth behind all those horrible rumours about her? Birgitta blamed herself for everything that happened that day and she was afraid Katja would do the same. She was afraid of losing her granddaughter but if she kept acting this way it would be unavoidable or it seemed like that at least. She took a deep breath and said, “I will tell you since you want to know it so bad. But not here let’s go to the garden under the willow tree. I will tell you the story.”

Katja was taken by surprise and asked, “Really just like when I was little?”

“Yes, just like that,” Birgitta answered with a loving smile on her face.

They walked to the garden and sat on the bench which was placed right under the Willow tree. The wind was moving its branches and it reminded Birgitta of that tragic day again. She felt tears rushing to her eyes, but she blinked them quickly. She was not going to cry at least not now maybe after she finishes the story.

“You might hate me after I tell you this story” she warned Katja.

“I don’t think I could ever hate you mormor. Whatever happened or whatever you did can’t be that bad.” Kata said confidently.

“Don’t be so sure. Your mother did.” She said with a sad smile. Cause if she didn’t smile, she would have cried.

Katja knew her mom and grandma had their issues, but she never thought her mom hated Birgitta. What could’ve happened to cause a daughter to hate her mother she wondered.

But her thoughts were interrupted by Birgitta starting the story, “It all happened after the last time you were here as a kid. You were around 5…”