Dear Doctor

Dear Doctor Grant,

You requested to know my side of the story from that night.

I remember it all in vivid detail.

I remember...

I remember fidgeting in my Paris dorm, sitting on the bed half-dressed and sleep deprived. Tattered dark red curtains hung over my room’s window, just above a slightly-less-tattered wooden desk and chair. Was I going to go through with it? Was this worth it? I really wanted to make friends, and here I was on the cusp of finally making friends, but I had a decision to make.

I’m not one to break the rules… usually. I’ve always been timid, a little quieter than most. I follow the rules and stay in my lane, hoping that others choose to do the same. It’s led to a pretty chilled, unproblematic existence for the most part.

That night I decided to break that pattern.

One of my dreams was to travel abroad. (I promise this is relevant). I had done a lot of traveling within the country throughout my childhood, going to national parks and sitting in a smelly too-small minivan on cross country road trips. Apparently, I’d been to Canada when I was a baby, just to the other side of Niagara Falls back when you didn’t need a passport to go to both sides. That was my only experience out of the country, up to this point.

One day, walking into my college’s student center in search of food, I discovered a study-abroad fair. It was like a gift handed to me on a silver platter. I walked through all the booths, but none of them applied to my minor or major. It was packed. Eager students swarmed around the large room like hornets. On my way out, I saw a booth that advertised a “General Education Abroad.” I walked over, picked up a flier that said “Paris,” then called my parents. They agreed to fund half of the trip.

Now you have the backstory. Let’s resume back to where I was: restless and anxious in the Paris dorm room, with a decision to make. I was balancing on a knife’s edge, but I wouldn’t be telling you this if I’d fallen on the boring side. Along with the adventure of studying abroad came a host of rules. First, buddy system. You were never allowed to travel with less than a group of three. Second, curfew. Curfew was eleven at night. You weren’t allowed to be off campus after that. Finally, don’t do anything illegal. That one is the most obvious, but it’s kind of implied wherever you are. That is one of the rules I was going to break.

The other rule I was going to break was curfew. It was already well after midnight, and I didn’t have very many problems breaking that one. It would most likely get me a slap on the wrist if I was caught out past eleven.

I looked at my watch. It was getting closer to one in the morning, the time we’d all agreed to meet outside. I had the sudden urge to pee. I was getting more nervous every time the skinny hand nudged the fat one a little further. My phone buzzed.

The text read, “You ready? Heading down now.” It was Jake.

“I’m almost ready. Heading down soon.” Marley was the next to reply.

“I’ll be there in five,” I replied. It takes twice as long as it should have to type the message. My fingers are moving through molasses. My hands shook as I put the phone into my pocket. I rattled out an exhale. I hadn’t realized I’d been holding my breath.

It was time to go.

I recognized Marley and Jake instantly as I walked out the back door of the building. Their silhouettes cast shadows on the lawn. It wasn’t quite a full moon, but there was enough light to walk around without a flashlight.

“Hey,” I said, keeping my voice low.

“You ready, dude?” Jake asked. The silhouette got clearer as I approached. He jumped back and forth, buzzing with energy.

“I’m not sure how to answer that.” I was excited too, but I also wanted to puke. “So where did you say the entrance was?”

“It’s over by the bar down the street,” he pointed south.

I looked over at Marley. She seemed less energetic, but not completely calm. She was also on edge. She understood.

“Well, what’re we waiting for?” Marley asked. She walked past Jake and towards the bar. Jake followed right behind her. I trailed behind him.

“Where did the guy say it was?” I asked when we got there. I kept my head on a swivel. It wasn’t just our professors we had to worry about. If anybody saw us enter the sewer, they’d know what we’d be doing and could get the police called on us.

“Found it!” Jake squatted down over a grate and stuck his fingers through the holes. “You ready?” He looked at me and Marley with wide eyes. I was just glad I didn’t have to be the one to stick my fingers in there.

“Oh, heck yeah.” Marley seemed to be less on edge. This was it. The excitement overtook the anxiety in me. I was still a little scared, but more eager knowing we were this close.

We were about to enter the catacombs.

The Paris catacombs were originally quarries, eventually turned grave sites. The people in Paris needed to find a sanitary place to relocate bodies filling up cemeteries and polluting water sources. The old quarries under the city were an obvious solution. More than six million bodies were relocated under the city in these twisting tunnels in the late 16^th and early 17^th centuries. Skulls were organized into ornate designs and shapes. Crosses, phrases, walls, all made from the bones of late Parisians.

A tour was given to tourists for a fee, only showing certain gated off sections of the catacombs, but because the catacombs are larger than three times the size of Paris, there were illegal secret entrances scattered throughout the city. Explorers of the catacombs were referred to as “Cataphiles.” Jake just happened to run into one of these Cataphiles while at dinner earlier that day. He drew a map on a napkin, gave Jake some tips, and told him not to venture too far.

Jake lifted the grate and slid it over just enough to fit someone inside.

“Ladies first?” He asked.

“Yeah, right.” Marley pushed me towards the opening in the ground. I leaned over and looked down. It wasn’t a very far drop. I sit down on the pavement and then swing my legs into the opening. I inhale, then hop into the hole. My feet land on squishy ground. The grate is just above my head. Marley jumps in next, then Jake. He slides the grate back over, hunching to make room for his head.

“Okay, there should be a ladder just that way,” he points behind me. He takes out the napkin with the map. “Yeah, just over there, I think. It was originally connected to a manhole, but now that’s sealed. It should go straight down to the first level of the catacombs.”

“How deep are we gonna go?” Marley asked. I was also interested.

“I’m not sure. Did you guys bring your flashlights?”

“Yeah.”

“Yeah,” I echo. I pull out my small LED flashlight and click it on. They do the same. Jake leads the way towards the ladder.

It’s metal, slick and wet with age and bolted onto the wall. This time Jake didn’t ask, he just grabs the ladder and starts the descent.

The climb down is long. Longer than I expected. When I finally reached the rocky ground, I swung my flashlight around. The walls were jagged rock, and the ceiling was low, low enough to get me to crouch. Graffiti was sprayed all over the walls. Beer cans, bottles, and needles were scattered on the ground. I looked up. Jake and Marley were already starting off in one direction.

“Did we make it? Is this it?” I shouted from behind.

“Yeah, this is it. A little less spooky and a little trashier than I expected,” Jake called back.

“This is probably just as far as most people go. It might clear up.”

I slapped the back of my neck. The hairs stood on end. I turned around and was only faced with the darkness of the empty hollow. I had the feeling I was being watched. I turned back around and tried to ignore it, but the hairs never relaxed. The feeling didn’t go away. I couldn’t shake it, so I opted to ignore it instead.

The shape of the rocky corridor was getting more sporadic at this point. It expanded and contracted every few meters, causing us to go from standing, to crouching, to standing again, and then to crawling.

The crawling was definitely the worst part up to that point. I wasn’t claustrophobic, if I was, I wouldn’t be here in the first place, but it was even a little too much for me to handle. My breath quickened and I could feel my heartbeat in my ears. I get pushing forward, the tunnel slowly getting narrower.

“Hold on, guys,” Jake shouted back. He stopped abruptly, Marley’s face slammed into his backside, and my face slammed into hers at almost the exact moment. Pain shot up the bridge of my nose and we both let out a grunt. We must’ve looked ridiculous. Imagine The Human Centipede. No, never mind. Don’t imagine that, please.

“Sorry!” He said earnestly.

“What’s wrong?” Marley ignored the apology. Despite the ache in my nose, I was happy to have stopped moving for a second. I was starting to feel lightheaded.

“Uh… It drops off right here into a larger space. I can see the ground, but I’d be diving in headfirst. I don’t suppose there’s any way that we could turn around?”

I started to shimmy backwards, creating more space between me and Marley. My knees were getting chewed up at this point. I eventually got to a wide enough point where I could rock backwards onto the balls of my feet. The beam of my flashlight caught Marley and Jake as they did the same, except Jake didn’t stop there. He spun one hundred and eighty degrees and started crawling backwards. My breath caught in my throat.

“You’re not seriously going to go down that hole,” I said.

“What? Why not? It looked big enough to stand. You can stay here if you want, but I want to see what’s down there.”

I didn’t think. I drew the line right there. At this point I was starting to breathe faster, heavier. I had no desire to delve any deeper. I was done. I sat down and brought my knees to my chest, back against the chilled rock.

“Alright, suit yourself.” He looked towards Marley. “What about you? You comin’?”

“Only if you go in first,” she replied.

“Deal.”

Marley did the same maneuver that Jake did, turning herself completely around and crawling backwards. They both turned their flashlights off. It wasn’t much use if they couldn’t see where they were going.

“Be back in a few, Matt. Don’t get lost, alright?” I couldn’t see Jake behind Marley. He was already reaching the narrower section as he called this out.

“Alright,” I mumbled. I kept my flashlight fixed in their direction, only diverting the beam once they disappeared. I pointed it in the other direction. It was empty. Jagged walls ran into inky darkness on both sides, seemingly going forever.

I started fidgeting with the flashlight. Sweat in my hands made it difficult to grip. I set it between my legs and put my face in my hands. Part of me hoped that Marley and Jake wouldn’t find anything interesting down there, that they’d get bored quickly and make their way back up.

Knocking came from my left. I scrambled for the flashlight and sent its beam that direction. The same direction that Marley and Jake disappeared.

“Hello?”

No response.

“Jake? Marley? Is everything okay?”

Nothing.

“Come on, that’s not funny.”

The knocking comes again, this time louder, quicker, more aggressive. I jump to my feet, hitting my head on the rock ceiling. Stars fill my vision. I get on my hands and knees, the small LED flashlight between my teeth. The sound of feet shuffling comes from the opposite direction. It’s fast. Too fast. It’s like someone is running without picking up their feet.

I pointed the beam towards the sound of the shuffling. The sound stops as soon as the beam reaches that side of the tunnel. Shivers run through my body. The hairs on the back of my neck get complimented with gooseflesh.

“Is everything okay down there?” I shouted, voice shaky. Still no response. I put the flashlight back in my mouth and crawled towards where Marley and Jake had disappeared to. My left arm slips and slides into the hole, causing my chest to impact the rock floor. I started breathing harder, but I wasn’t getting enough air. My lungs were strained, wheezing on the way in and rattling on the way out. I propped my body back up with my arms and pointed the flashlight into the hole. I couldn’t see the ground. Hadn’t Jake said he could see the ground? I backed away from the hole, processing what I’d just seen.

Had Jake and Marley fallen too far? Did they get hurt? I would’ve been able to hear them if they’d gotten hurt. Maybe Jake’s flashlight was just better than mine.

Two cold hands grabbed my legs. Two more gripped around the side of my head. I was being pulled back. Long spindly fingers stretched into my mouth and down my throat, stopping me from screaming.

I woke up in my dorm room bed in the same clothes that I’d left in. They were greasy, covered in dust and something slick, warm. The only light in the room was of a streetlamp outside my window. All I can see are silhouettes and shadows. I patted my pockets and found my phone where it usually is, in the front right pocket of my jeans. The small screen blinked on and read, “4:00am.”

Four in the morning? No, that couldn’t be right. It had been a little after one when we’d all left the building. It had maybe been an hour since then.

The hands. The cold, wet hands. The memory overpowered me in that moment, taking my breath. My body felt like it had been drenched in ice water. I laid in bed, refusing to move even after the sun came up. At that point I’d noticed the blood. At that point, it had already started to dry, staining my clothes and skin. I’d already checked myself. I wasn’t injured. It wasn’t my blood.

The pounding on the door came later. The mortified look of the professors when I opened the door is still burned in my brain.

The bodies of Jake and Marley were discovered in the catacombs later that day. What remained of them, at least. Security cameras from the bar showed me emerge completely alone from the catacombs, covered in blood.

That’s all I remember. I didn’t do this. I didn’t hurt my friends. You must believe me.

The hands did.

Respectfully yours,

Matthew