Chester and the Dame

“It was a beautiful ceremony, wasn’t it?”

Click, click, click.

An image of a woman, one of eight people seated at a circular table smiles at another woman, seated to her right. 

Click.

“Oh yes, absolutely perfect!”

The woman sitting opposite, smiling back. 

Theo’s finger beats a steady rhythm on his camera’s shutter button as he works the wedding reception. High end guests make obligatory smalltalk in the ballroom of a golf and country club.

Plush carpets, hardwood tables in a crescent around a dance floor under chandeliers dripping perfect crystal. All at the foot of a stage holding the bridal table. Two story picture frame windows offer views of the manicured lawns of the course.

This whole scene doesn't whisper but screams wealth, informing guests the Bride’s father wants them to know about his tech founder bank account. Theo thinks it’s a bit much.

But he’s been told this has to be the best wedding album ever. Amanda’s out of business if it isn’t.

He can do that. For her. He’s a pro, collecting smiles like a kid collecting cards. All the faces that make the show. Prime time before the couple even arrives.

Even Derek, the cheesy DJ has swapped his signature Hawaiian shirt for a tux.

Click, click, click.

As he works, Theo feels a sudden, insistent tug on his elbow.

He looks down and sees a small boy, maybe four years old grinning up at him.

“I see?” says the child.

Theo is so surprised to see a kid at this black tie, definitely child-free event that before he thinks he has turned the screen for the child to see. 

Theo is unsure what to do. He’s uncomfortable with kids, and tonight everything has to be perfect.

He is relieved to see Amanda, the wedding planner, hurrying over. In a one piece green silk gown, heels and perfectly coiffed brown hair she blends seamlessly with the high end guests. Only her “Everything’s fine. What the hell?” smile reveals anything amiss. 

Theo looks back down, as the child grabs his camera. Only the strap around his neck saves it from being tugged away by the kid’s sticky fingers. Where did the kid find something sticky? 

“Chester, darling, what are you doing?” The aristocratic English accent apparently belongs to the child’s mother, who swoops in wearing a dress so silver it’s almost white - who wears white as a wedding guest? - and scoops up sticky-handed-Chester.

“So sorry, kids, you know?” and the woman is gone as quickly as she appeared.

“What the hell?” Amanda murmurs, handing Theo a napkin for the camera. “There should not be kids here! I’ll talk to the staff. We can’t have this tonight!”

Click, click.

Theo grins wryfully, pointing his camera at her. She gives him the look she always does when confronted by his lens. She has already regained composure.

“Any early bets?” She asks, referring to their game. Figuring out which guests will get caught up in the romance. Fall in love. 

Theo shakes his head. It’s early. With a parting smile at Amanda, he moves on to the next table.

“What a perfect wedding!”

Click, click, click.

A sudden shout breaks the hum of smalltalk.

“Chester! Where are you Chester?”

The woman in the silver gown stands at the centre of the room.

“He’s missing, where is he?”

—

“So, he was in the kitchen looking for snacks.”

Theo eavesdrops as Amanda talks to Chester’s mother. Apparently a full fledged Dame. Recognised by the monarch of England Dame. He points his camera at various guests as he listens to Amanda de-escalate.

“Chester doesn’t like the canapes!” the Dame accuses angrily. As if it’s an oversight of the kitchen to not cater to a child who shouldn’t be there.

“Terribly sorry,” Amanda’s smile would convince anyone who didn’t know her, “we weren’t anticipating Chester. The chefs are preparing some special snacks right now.”

Wow.

If the Dame weren’t a Dame, Theo would know she was important. Theo hasn’t heard Amanda use customer-service-voice in years. 

Mollified, the Dame glides back into the crowd, dragging the unperturbed Chester behind.  

“You okay?” Theo asks Amanda as she watches the Dame depart.

Amanda tries to give him a sunny smile, “Any bets yet?” . 

Theo doesn’t buy it.

“Derek?” Theo jokes. The pencil thin DJ’s life mission is the amorous pursuit of bridesmaids. Only because he’s so good at getting everybody dancing does Amanda keep him around.

Theo can’t stand Derek.

Amanda glares lightheartedly. Theo whips his camera up, takes a couple more shots of Amanda. She gives him the look again. The look contains an entire conversation they’ve had so many times it no longer needs words.

“They’re not going to pay you for pictures of their wedding planner!” Amanda would say.

“You never know.” Theo would respond.

Amanda views the craft of ensuring couples get to be the main characters in their story for twenty four hours as an art form. 

Normally she picks and chooses her clients so carefully.

Theo takes another look at their surroundings, realising that the overtly gilded setting is far from Amanda’s style. Gaudy, lacking scope for unique flairs of detail she enjoys offering couples. Memories he turns to stories in his photos.

A couple of years ago, she’d been in demand. This is definitely the priciest venue they’ve been in since she divorced her trader husband. Since her well heeled clients had disappeared with him. 

This is an opportunity for her.

“Yes we do, we both know you always try. How many pictures of me have you sold over the years?” Amanda would point out.

“There’s always a first time.” Theo would grin at her. 

They’d first started working together nearly fifteen years ago. After Amanda planned Theo’s sister’s wedding. One look at Theo’s amateur photos and Amanda had started hiring him as a professional. 

It had been a dream. He’d have photographed anything to call it a job.

These days he is a publishing photojournalist. He’d still occasionally helped Amanda through when she’d asked. But occasionally had gotten more and more occasional as the years wore on.

Until nine months ago. Since his wife had run off with her personal trainer, Theo has been working for Amanda nearly every weekend.

“Nobody lives more than at a wedding.” She would say. As if life were contagious. As if it would heal him.

Theo wasn’t sure it worked that way. But she’d been the first to believe in him, and it wasn’t like he had any better ideas.

“Seriously, no early bets?” Amanda asks.

“I bet that wave from the doorman means the wedding party is arriving,” Theo replies, “so fun time’s over. Family time is here!” 

—

Theo is out on the golf course with the family and wedding party.

Click, click, click.

The groom, Ben, grins confidently down the barrel of the camera. flanked by his best man, Bruce laughing at Ben. His other groomsman, Albert, stands half a step behind his eyes fixed on something behind the camera.

Click.

The happy couple clasp hands. The Father of the groom, or ‘FOG’ as he’s known in wedding parlance, stands proudly behind the groom’s right shoulder. FOB, the Father of the bride, is behind the Bride’s left shoulder.

Click.

The mothers join the photo, expressions manicured to the photo with a grace that the course’s greenskeeper would envy. 

Click.

Theo notices movement just out of frame.

Chester, racing towards the wedding party? The small child’s head tilted in their direction, legs pedal at full speed to only just prevent him from falling.

The Dame glides in his wake. Heels off, dangling in her hand, gown gathered in the left hand just above her knee.

“Aunty aunty aunty aunty!” Chester barrels arms wide into the Groom's mother. 

Click.

MOB looks furious, FOG bemused. FOB has wide eyes only for the Dame. Chester is attempting to climb his apparent aunt, MOG, like a tree.

Theo’s ex had wanted kids. Theo has never seen the appeal.

Click.

Chester must have a sixth sense. Every time Theo hits the shutter button Chester’s head turns and flashes an angelic smile for the camera. 

Much to the amusement of the Bride and Groom.

Click, click, click.

“So sorry, so sorry,” repeats the Dame in a tone that indicates otherwise, “well Matilda, as long as you have Chester, mind if I borrow Samuel for a moment?”

Without waiting for acquiescence, the Dame commandeers FOB, Samuel, by the elbow, steering him away from the group. 

The group is flustered, Theo steps in.

“Okay, folks, over here, that’s it, trees behind your left shoulders, lake in the background, beautiful…”

Click, click, click.

Whatever happens, Theo will get what’s needed to tell this love story. Late afternoon light is painting the palettes of summer colour in contrast and shadow, and he won’t waste any of it.

Theo efficiently combines art with cataloguing requisite shots. Beatrice, the Maid of Honour, all business, marshalling the family to ensure her sister’s day. Alice, the other bridesmaid, caught up in the emotions of the day. That might get messy later, but for now she’s a star.

Theo needs photos of Bruce immediately. Bruce is celebrating with gusto, and a lot of beer. He will almost certainly be messy later.

The challenge is Albert, who is beyond shy. Keeps attempting to sneak out of frame. 

Click, click, click.

A tugging at Theo’s elbow.

Sticky hands raised up towards him.

“I see? I see?”

Theo corrects himself. Albert is not the challenge.

—

Main meals are served and Theo is enjoying a moment of respite. 

“How was Family Time?” Amanda is talking to Theo while her eyes scan the room for any imperfection. 

Theo knows this is a moment in the evening Amanda assesses with clinical expectation. Guests should be getting comfortable with each other. Conversation should murmur at a particular level. Even cutlery and glasses should clink at a certain cadence.  A single fork out of place will spark Amanda to action. She seeks perfection.

Theo knows the real question: What is going to disrupt the day?

“Good group,” Theo answers, “watch the best man’s drinking. Watch Alice, she’s feeling the day, watch Albert, he’s liable to hide. Watch FOB and the Dame, something going on there.”

He pauses.

“What’s her story?” Theo digs.

“Initially RSVP’d no, yet she’s here. Incredibly networked. If she tells her sister that tonight was a success, I will be planning weddings that make this look like a backyard affair. If she doesn’t…”

The silence is awkward now. Theo hadn’t really believed Amanda’s business was this much in need. 

“What about the bridesmaids?” Derek, the DJ cuts in.

Theo normally can’t stand Derek, who thinks a Hawaiian shirt and a pencil moustache are all it takes to charm bridesmaids. Theo’s dislike isn’t just because his ex’s new man shares Derek’s taste in shirts. Derek was an ass long before Theo’s wife left. Theo is not convinced Derek’s supernatural ability to fill the dance floor outweighs his human failings. Tonight, he’s actually glad Derek is here..

Theo is saved from answering Derek’s question as the Dame materialises before Amanda, a look of panic breaking the perfect serenity of her expression.

“He’s gone again!”

No need to ask who. 

Before the group can react, a fork dings against a glass, and silence falls across the room. 

“Alright,” Amanda whispers directions, “I’ll find Chester. Derek, get ready, you’re on after speeches. Theo, you know what to do!”

Speeches are about to commence.

Theo takes a deep breath. Emotional day, a drunk best man, a womanising DJ and a missing child who’s mother’s judgement of the night will decide Amanda’s future.

What could possibly go wrong?

—

Click, click, click.

“Ladies and gentlemen, today, I do not lose my daughter, I gain a new son…”

Theo snaps from below and beside the lectern to one side of the Bridal table. His lens points up at the Father of the Bride, glass of champagne raised like he’s the statue of liberty. 

In the background at the bridal table, his daughter, tears shining in her eyes.

Click. 

“Welcome to our family! We have never seen Ben more motivated, successful and full of joy! The two of you are more than the sum of your parts!”

Father and mother of the groom speak together, an image of unity in their welcome of their new daughter-in-law.

Click. 

“We are just so damned proud of you!”

The Maid of Honour’s open, honest love for her sister steers the room through the narrow, fragile space between laughing and crying. Between the dramatic quavers in her voice, and tears not always quite restrained through heroic effort. Her ad libbed quips offer permission to the room to laugh at their own emotion.

This is where Theo thrives. When people see these images, they will relive the feelings from these moments. 

Click, click, click.

When they see the Maid looking adoringly across from the lectern to the couple. See the Groom’s arm adorning the Bride’s shoulders like a favoured, tailored mantle. See the Bride’s joy in tears streaming down her smiling face.

They will recall how in these brief moments, their own hearts swelled. How can you not be romantic at a wedding? 

Is that Chester poking his head out from under the Bridal table?

Click, click, click.

Definitely Chester.

“When the two of you started dating, I remember thinking she was so far out of your league! And she is. But here we are…”

The best man sways a little, but his words are clear. 

Chester has crawled out from under the Bridal table. It appears that nobody has noticed. He crouches behind the bride and groom, a table ornament held as a pretend camera. He mimics Theo’s pose, taking imaginary photos.

“Ladies and gentlemen, to the Bride and Groom!”

As the room stands, Alice and Albert have noticed Chester. Just out of frame, laughing together. 

Click.

Chester sees Theo stealing glances, gives him a giant smile and a thumbs up.

Theo spots the Dame, her glide aimed at the stage. Others are noticing now. 

Click.

Theo finds Amanda, a look of horror on her face.

The Groom is watching his Aunt. Frozen. The Bride follows his gaze. Sees the Dame. Follows her gaze. Sees Chester.

Time stands still.

The Bride smiles at her new husband, turns, scoops up Chester and makes her way to the microphone.

The Dame stops.

“Ladies and gentlemen, I know tonight’s child-free, but I just have to introduce my new nephew, Chester. He couldn’t stay away, and has been popping up all day! Is he not just the cutest?”

Chester offers the crowd his angelic smile.

The Bride locks eyes with the Dame, smiling.

The crowd titters nervously.

The Dame’s expression slowly softens into a smile of her own.

The Bride and Dame laugh.

Everyone is laughing.

Now it’s a party.

—

Theo circles the couple as they finish their first dance, capturing intimate moments from every angle.

Click, click, click.

He moves smoothly through the crowd, snapping shots of candid joy. 

Click.

A favourite uncle and the bride share a moment. Theo doesn’t know why they laugh, but the image radiates happiness.

Click.

Alice, the bridesmaid, caught mid-conversation with Derek. 

Click.

The groom, best man, and college friends form a lively circle, dancing with an unspoken competitive spirit. 

Click.

Chester, standing on a chair behind Derek and dumping a bucket of ice over his head.

What a great photo.

Theo has always liked that kid!

Click.

Amanda, standing in the corner, watches with satisfaction. Theo thinks how much she looks like a movie star.

She sees Theo’s camera pointed in her direction.

She gives him the look.

—

“How did the photos go? Did you tell your story?” Amanda asks Theo.

The pair sit on a balcony which during daylight would offer spectacular views of the 18th hole. In the dark of midnight, the world ends at the white concrete balustrade. 

Couple and guests have departed, the country club staff are cleaning inside.

The pair share a cigarette. Passing back and forth, as if through sharing, neither has forsworn their separate commitments to refrain.

“Oh yes, timeless love! How about you? You had a few curveballs.”

Amanda’s laugh makes Theo think of water descending crystal chimes. “Chester and the Dame!”

“Chester and the Dame.”

Amanda gazes out into the void of the night, a small smile on her face.

“Our blessed newlyweds had a wonderful, perfect day. They even thought Chester was adorable. Praised my ingenuity in inviting the two of them.”

Theo shakes his head. It’s always something to keep in mind in their line of work, that the sheer act of getting married is such a big story in itself the couple rarely has time for all the subplots of the evening.

“Did you? I can’t imagine you invited Chester.”

“Oh no, that wasn’t me.”

“Then who?”

“Turns out it was FOB.”

“But why?”

“Turns out Daddy dearest’s finances may have been more stressed than he lets on. The Dame is the newest investor in his company… and the saviour of her nephew’s wedding.” 

“Ah,” said Theo, braves the question, “Was it a success? Are you back in business?”

Amanda shrugs, “Time will tell.”

The silence stretches.

“So, the Dame and FOB, in business matrimony!” says Theo, “and there I was thinking that none of our guests found love tonight!”

Amanda laughs again. Theo does like it when she laughs. There was a long time when she didn’t. 

“Really,” Amanda turns, looking at him with a sly smile, “you don’t think?”

“What? Who?,” asks Theo.

More laughter.

“Tell me!”

“Well,” she says, “I think you had a pretty big fan!”

Their eyes meet, reflecting the light from the windows. Midnight’s silence stretches.

“Chester clearly has a new hero!”