Seeing beyond the Clouds

Submitted into Contest #152 in response to: Start your story with a character saying “I can see it now.”... view prompt

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Fiction Friendship Inspirational

"I can see it now". said Jane. Jane climbing up the mountain along with her friends. "The clouds are moving west so I can see the top of the mountain covered with snow" Jane yelled down, as the wind gusts down their faces. John climb up behind Jane. "Do you think we will make it before nightfall? asked John, looking at Jane. "I don't think we will because of the weather. said Sarah. Jane turned looking up the mountain and see the weather coming in. Jane thought Sarah is probably right. Jane turned around. "Sarah, I think you are right. We are going to make camp a quarter of the way to the top. We are going to face rough weather tonight. Let's get moving so we can make our mark." said Jane. They continued on their journey. The gray clouds moving faster as they moved up the mountain. A hour into their journey snow started falling down. Jane turned to look at Sarah and John. She wasn't sure they were going to make to the designed spot on the mountain. The clouds are moving in quicker and the snow is getting heavier. "Maybe we need to find a stopping point so we can make camp." yelled Jane. " I thought we agreed to go further." stated John. He looked upset because Jane want to stopped. He is determined to get to the stopping point. Jane looked concerned about John's comment. " Looked the weather is getting worse and we want to be safe" stated Jane. Sarah got uncomfortable with Jane and John. She know she was going to be the voice of reason again because they have an issue with each other. "I can see it now" yelled Sarah. "What are you talking about?" asked Jane, yelling down the mountain. Sarah stopped talking and look at both of them. "I can see it now what the issue is between you and John. If you have feelings for each other, both of you need to address them now. We are on the side of mountain in the middle of nowhere, climbing and looking out for each safety. "yelled Sarah. Jane look shocked by what Sarah had just said to them. John turned his back on both them. He is wondering has he been to obivious about his feeling for Jane. John turned back around and face both of his friends. "We don't have time for this stuff. We have got to get up this mountain before that huge cloud in the distance gets here and we are cnowed in. Let's keep moving. We will go as far as we can and make camp. Keep moving." yelled John. The friends continuned up the mountian. They contiuned up and up while watching the clouds in the distance. John took the lead and moving at a fast pace. He was determine to meet their agreed goal. Jane and Sarah had a hard time keeping up with him. They could still see him so they were ok with the faster pace. Jane started thinking of the comment Sarah made about the having feeling for each other. Jane knows how she feels about John. Well, at least she thought she knew. Does she have feelings for him? Jane wondered about the idea of John and her as a couple then it hit her about their names. John and Jane, she thought. "Sounds like a nursey rhythm." she thought. She didn't know if she like that idea or not. Sarah looked up at Jane and saw the expression on her face. She know Jane was in deep thought. She wondered if it was about the comment she made earlier. "We are almost at a stopping point, ladies" John yelled down to them. They both looked relieve because soon they would be relaxing in their warm sleeping bags in their own tents. Jane is looking forward to finding some privacy. The snow is getting thicker by the minute and the climbers are getting very tired. John stopped to catch his breath when a loud noise roared from the top of the mountain. A look of horror come on his face. Sarah and Jane stopped dead in their tracts. They all hoped it wasn't avalanche. John turned and look down at his friends. He knew at that moment they were going to have stopped and make camp. He looked back up the mountain and saw no snow moving. They all hoped it was just the snow adjusting on the mountain. "We are going to have to stopped and make camp. I think the snow is making the mountain unsettled and I fear if we keep going we may cause an avalanche. Is this spot ok? asked John. The wind gusting down from the mountain was so cold that Sarah and Jane could shack their heads up and down indiciating yes to John. John walked a few feet more. He turned to see his friends and they are barely hanging on. Oxygen is getting thinner as they get higher. John turned looking up the mountain. He turned to and point down with his hand indicating we camp here. The ladies sat down immediately and had a look of relief. "Ladies, lets make camp so we can rest up for tomorrow." said John. Both Sarah and Jane give the thumbs up to John. They all started setting up tents and working anchoring them down so the strong winds would not blow the tents away during the night. Jane put up her tent and immediately turned on the small standing propand heater. She stay right at the heater for what like an hour. She heard a noise outside her tent that sound like someone falling. Jane rushed out of her tent to find her friend on the ground. "Sarah, what happened? asked Jane. "I want trying to put my tent but I lost my footing and fell backwards. I think i sprunge my ankle. Can you help me up so I see if it's ok? asked Sarah. "Sure, I hope you are ok. You can't finish the climb if you are hurt. Ok, come on lets check you out." said Jane. Jane help Sarah up on her feet. "Put pressure on you ankle. Let's see of you can walk". said Jane. "Ok, give me a minute. I can put pressure on my ankle so it's not broken. Which is good. Let's see if I can walk. " said Sarah. She got up and start to walk. Pain shot up her leg into her back. Sarah yelled so loud. John come running out to his tent. Oh my God! John yelled. "What is going on out here. Both of you are suppose to be putting up your tents and getting warm. Here you both are standing in the snow. What is going on here? " Sarah fell and hurt her ankle. It's not broken." said Jane. " Yea, it's not broken because I can put pressure on it but when I walk it's extremely painful." Said Sarah.

June 24, 2022 19:30

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1 comment

Ralph Aldrich
13:20 Jul 07, 2022

An interesting story, but I noticed alot of typos and tense usage. I new to writing myself so I use a tool call Grammaly. It helps alot. Keep up the good work!


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