About the girl who drives in the rain

About the Girl who Drives in the Rain 

She drives in the rain. 

In snow

In the hail

In the wind.

She drives and thinks and feels.

She drives until she can breathe again. 

She looks for peace 

Peace of the heart, the mind, the soul.

She looks for it in the sky- from the sky. 

She looks for it in the storms.

And a promise

From the subjects of interest:

If you realize their strength

And respect their power 

In all forms

They will share their stillness with you

And fill your empty places. 

…

To the girl 

Who drives in the rain

Who looks for that promise 

She is welcomed.  

There was something to her

About the contrast of warm and dry 

To the cold temper of the sky.

Something about being able to be understood 

Without speaking. 

And the protection  

From things she can’t control. 

…

What the Weather is Like. 

The rain comes lightly on some days. 

On others, it falls as if it carries a great weight. 

In the colder months, it freezes before it leaves the clouds

And coats everything in a blanket of white. 

Or forms a fist 

And hits like a hammer.

The wind howls.

It screams and sings and whistles. 

It pushes and pulls and blows. 

It seems so gentle

But it can shake a house. 

Though it can never be solid enough to go inside nicely. 

It can never be made to fit in a box 

It doesn’t belong in. 

And each one is different. 

Has a different voice. 

A different tune

Different strengths. 

They can be anything. 

But there’s always a purpose. 

They take up room.

They don't try to squeeze into small spaces

...

To the girl

Who drives in the rain,

It doesn’t matter if it’s midnight or midday.

If there’s wind or hail or snow or rain

She takes a deep breath 

She pushes the gas pedal

And keeps moving forward. 

And it’s not safe. 

It’s never safe.

Her steering wheel could spin

Her tires could slip

Her vision could fall short.

But for now, she drives.

If you ask her about it

If you ask her why

She wouldn’t be able to give you an answer. 

The words are still out of order

Still being found.

There isn't anywhere she needs to be.

There isn't a direction to choose.

But

She feels more in touch with the world 

When she chases the rain.

It distracts her from the things that don’t matter

And helps her realize the things that do. 

...

Some days

She drives with the purpose

Of getting lost. 

She wants to lose herself 

Her thoughts 

For her sole focus to only be on rain as it pours from the sky

Or the wind as it whips through trees.

She knows it wasn’t meant to challenge her

Her strength to its own. 

But it’s obligated to try. 

..

What it feels like to Fly.

In snow or rain

Especially when visibility is low

She looks out her windshield 

At the endless expanse in front of her

And pretends her tires have left the ground.

She wants to pretend she has been swept away.

She wants to pretend she has been carried away to a place she understands. 

To the place the rain comes from. 

She stares until it feels like a part of her.

Until all that is surrounding her

Is the rain.  

She drives as long as it takes to feel like she’s moving forward.

And it takes each sense, each part of her brain to keep driving.

And with it, her thoughts disappear. 

It is the one thing

In life,

That makes her feel free. 

…

One day

In the snow

She parked her car.

She leaned her seat all the way back

And uncovered the sunroof.

She turned up the heater 

And pulled a blanket up to her chin. 

And watched the blizzard settle around her. 

She watched for hours 

As drifts were built heavy and tall at her door

And the windshield was buried.

All she could see was white. 

All she could hear was the wind. 

And the kind of silence that only comes when it snows. 

She listened for hours.

Her heart beats slowly.

Her mind found a quiet place to rest.

She breathed in the world and let it out again. 

And all that was left

Was her and the snow.

Then, 100 years later

She took a little shovel

And a blue ice scraper

And she broke free. 

She had, paradoxically, thawed. 

Then she drove through the white.

With the snowflakes falling fast in front of her

And landing softly behind her.  

She drove to the sounds of sighing wind

She drove in the dark and kept going when the sky turned grey

And eventually, it seemed that the only thing that existed now 

Was her and the snow. 

...

How the World Heals.

When the world 

Spins around every day,

When it turns green, orange, brown 

No matter what

Even if your world is upside down. 

When it has the power to forget and remember whatever it wants

It’s hard not to feel small. 

And she feels small.

So she drives to become part of something bigger. 

She drives away the sad days

And the intrusive thoughts. 

To find something other than endings. 

Because the wind can howl louder than she can cry. 

Because the snow is so peaceful and yet still harsh. 

Because the clouds release hail and are light again.  

Because when it rains, it erases everything. 

Because it puts the quiet, and loud, and sad things where they belong. 

And it matters to her

Being part of something bigger

Being part of something important

Something that makes sense. 

...

When the tears fall

And leave her empty

And her fears

Have swallowed her whole

She drives through the rain

Right to the other side.

When no one knows her name

She shows the wind how to sing it.   

When all she can do is stay silent 

The snowflakes make that silence beautiful. 

Because each time she drives into the rain

Each time she drives into the snow, and the hail, and the wind

She remembers who she is.

She lets the world in.  

The weather is an ally

It understands her

And explains her 

In a way she can’t do for herself. 

By facing it

She is facing herself. 

She is acknowledging the things she can’t put into words

The things she can’t give a name

Sometimes when she drives in the rain

She counts every drop that flies past. 

She assigns it a story

From her own life

And she leaves it behind. 

…

The Fulfilling promises.

To the girl

Who drives in the rain

She can be understood

She can be brave.

She can feel so many things 

And not be ignored

She can scream as loud as she wants 

And cry till her eyes turn into an ocean. 

And the rain cries with her.