The End of a Chapter

“I want a divorce.”

“What do you mean?” I stared at my wife.

Alexandria stood by the door, appearing to be on her way out. “I mean I can’t live with you anymore.”

I was happy and I thought Lexi was too. Although we only dated two months before I proposed and she accepted, we have been married for ten years and have been raising two beautiful, well mannered children…a boy, for me and a girl, for her. I thought everything was perfect…or at least as perfect as most marriages seem to be.

I was in the middle of a sentence and deep in thought about what my character wanted to convey. I looked up over the top of my computer at my wife. “What’s the matter, Lexi? I thought we had a good marriage.”

“I feel like a widow.” She looked away from me. “You’re never here.”

“What are you talking about? I’m here all day.”

She looked back at me and pointed at my desk and my open computer. “Physically you are here in the house, but you are not here mentally and emotionally for me and the children.”

I was bewildered and started to defend myself but she continued with a shake of her head. “You never have time for us…it’s always, ‘Not now, I’m in the middle of a sentence.’”

“Lexi, what are you trying to tell me?”

Tears were welling in her eyes. “I‘m trying to tell you that you appear to be married to your writing…not to me.”

“But Lexi, you know this is my livelihood…it’s what I do.”

She wiped her eyes with the edge of her finger. “It’s more than that. You never have time to just sit and talk with me or spend time with the children.”

“I’m sorry Lexi, but you knew before we got married that writing was my career.”

“I knew you liked to write stories, but I never knew you were married to your computer and would spend more time with it than with your wife and family.”

I sat back in my chair. “That’s not fair, Lexi. You know how intense my writing can be.”

“Bruce, I feel that your ‘writing career’ is more important than your family.”

I stood up and walked over to my beautiful wife. “Honey, I’m sorry you feel that way. I love you and I don’t mean to hurt you. Please give me another chance.”

Her stance was still rigid and I was afraid I was going to lose her. “I don’t know,” she replied. “I have felt so lonely for so long.”

I put my arms around her. “I’m sorry, Lexi…I do love you and I’m sorry I’ve hurt you. Help me to be a better husband and father.”

I felt her relax in my embrace. “Do you promise to spend more time with me and the children?”

I hugged her closely. “I do,” I kissed her on the forehead before kissing he soft lips. “I love you, Lexi.”

She looked deeply into my eyes, like she was searching for my soul. “I love you too, Bruce.”

I thought about setting an alert on my computer to make me stop, periodically, so I could get up and spend some time with my wife and kids. That didn’t work because I can’t stop in the middle of a sentence. Then I decided to stop at the end of a chapter. 

I spent more time with Lexi. Often we would take a walk around the block or through the park. I enjoyed those breaks and often had a fresh approach when I returned to the computer and my current novel. 

I also enjoyed spending more time with the children, whether it was listening to their tales about school, playing ball with my son Ben, or watching both of them play in the park.

As my marriage flourished, my writing suffered. Soon my editor was on my back…wanting more from me. He started giving me deadlines.

I had to write…I wanted to write…I loved to write…it was who I was…I was a writer.

It has been more than nine months since Lexi told me she wanted a divorce. I was under the impression that all was well in our household…until today.

I was at my desk, working on some difficult dialogue when Lexi walked in and closed the door behind her. “It’s not working.”

I looked up (from the middle of a sentence), expecting to hear about an appliance which had stopped working. “What’s not working?”

This time I sense there was bitterness in her words. “Our marriage, Bruce.” She stood firm like she was ready for battle. “I know you have tried and things have gone well…for awhile, but you are back to your old habits. You are leaving us behind again.”

I knew this was serious. I closed my computer, although I was in the middle of a sentence. I stood up.

“Don’t come over here and try to smooth talk me out of this…I’ve made up my mind.”

“Honey,” I pleaded.

“It’s too late, Bruce. I sill love you, but not what you have become as a husband and a father.” She took a deep breath. “I’m going to take the children with me, for now, and stay with my parents until I can find a place nearby so the children will be near to their school and to you…if and when you can find time to spend with them.”

“Lexi…”

She kept talking. I don’t want anything from you. I want to share custody of the children so they can be free to come and go and spend as much time with you as you have for them. I want us to be able to remain friends and co-parent the children. I don’t want anything to change, except our living arrangement.”

I was speechless and utterly devastated at the thought of losing Lexi. Finally I mustered up the words, “Is there anything I can say or do to change your mind?”

“No Bruce, it’s too late.” She quietly opened and closed the door behind her.

Thus, in the middle of a sentence, ended a chapter in my life.