My Money's Worth In Teeth

Monday afternoon. Busy. I had just come out of the 3.30 appointment with my new dentist and it had gone well. Really well. My faced was flushed with excitement and my grip on Michelle’s hand was bone crushing. I hadn’t noticed until she yanked it to let me know it was time to let go. I apologized profusely.

‘I just can’t believe how much it’s going for! It’s crazy!’ I shrieked.

‘Oh hun, it’s a fortune! Nowhere in this town have I been met with such outrageous prices,’ said Michelle.

‘I know. But free checkups for up to a year? It basically covers it! I think I’m really going to consider it. And you’ve been looking for a new dental plan too. Well, there you go.’

‘So, I guess you’ll be leaving then. I’m going to miss you,’ said Michelle, as she hugged my arm.

‘I know. But if all goes well and I’m able to get the braces before 5 o’clock tomorrow, I can still make the bus ride back just in time to make the show,’ I said.

Right then, my phone buzzed. It was a message I had been waiting for all afternoon. Since lunch time precisely, when I had texted that I would be seeing the dentist later. It was the good-looking stranger I had recently met through a dating app, and the very reason I now found myself with a very expensive dentist and a year’s worth of free insurance. For first time customers, he said. And Andrei was a very dear friend of his. But we had just gone out on that one date. And it had been great. But getting a once-in-a-lifetime dentist who subsidized his prices solely on the fact that I was now seeing his friend was a bit overreaching. Still, I liked Andrei and by the looks of it, he liked me enough to recommend me someone with stellar reviews and so, maybe taking this chance on us was actually worthwhile.

Andrei had been a mistake, at first. I hadn’t been looking to date anyone. Hadn’t in a while. I was in a place I frequently called ‘comfortable’. I had just come out of a miserable year-long relationship and wasn’t ready for another. Not soon anyway. Michelle, my best friend, greatly disapproved. So, when her constant pleas for me to put myself back out there went unanswered, she set up a profile for me behind my back. And it happened to be right when she was sneaking through my phone to see potential matches when she accidentally swiped right on his. They began corresponding almost immediately, her of course, under false pretenses. Then, she set up a date and told me a week later. The only reason I had gone was to apologize for wasting his time. But it had turned out to be a great first meet.

He wasn’t half as bad as I had thought. Nicely tall. The date had been casual; an alfresco coffee at a corner side cafe, so his fitting white t-shirt and jeans did the job. The brown leather boots and fedora were a nice touch. I liked that. His face wouldn't have launched a thousand ships but he was decent looking enough with a bit of beard growth along the sides of his face. And he seemed to have a lot of qualities I admired. Qualities I hadn’t got with my last boyfriend. For one, he listened. And he was genuinely interested in hearing what problems I had or things I wanted to change. Like my crossbite. The terrible crossbite I had wanted to fix for years but hadn’t come around to. Primarily, it might’ve been because my current dentist sucked, and I was lazy to go switching to another one that would’ve likely messed up my current spending habits. So, I stayed. Second, I didn’t really see myself in braces, especially after I was blindsided with that as the treatment for the condition. Therefore, I convinced myself that I could live with it, just as I always had and decided to never return to the matter. But just as I finished telling the story, I realized that in fact I was not done with the matter. Clearly, I wanted to drop it but my subconscious would not let it go. My ex had told me at the very beginning how ugly it looked and that had stuck with me to this day. Andrei felt for me. That was when he had suggested I go see this great guy he had known for years. He guaranteed me the best reception and a price that would knock my socks off. That it had, and for a great bargain. From that moment on, everything Andrei told me only drew me closer to him.

Coming out of the appointment, and now as Michelle left me on the sidewalk to catch the bus home, I made the decision; I was going to go through with it. Mr. Conrad, the short, heavily tanned new dentist with curly hair and a stylish mustache, had however told me that due to certain issues with his current office, and matters he had to urgently attend to at his countryside home, he would not be in the city for a while. He suggested that if it was okay with me, I could travel by train to his house where he had a fully equipped home practice. If it wasn’t too much trouble. It of course did require me to go out of my way to make the journey there and back, but then again, the only other time I could reschedule was a month away. I didn’t want to wait. I wanted the braces on and off as soon as possible. Unfortunately, it also meant that I would likely miss Michelle’s show at the theatre. It was the first successful play she had written, and now it was being produced. I promised that I would try to make it back in time so, I was going to take the earliest train out in the morning.

It was about an hour out from the city. A grand country home surrounded by miles of vineyard. I hired a cab that took me straight to the house from the station. A long gravel walkway led us up to the front door where he waited. As I stepped out and my emergency carrier was unloaded from the car, I felt strange. The feeling resembled one I hadn’t felt in a long time. Like I had just come visiting on holiday and was there for pleasure. I immediately shunned that thought because that would allow me to get comfortable. I didn’t want to make this a familiar place. I was there to get my braces in, and this would probably never happen again, hopefully.

I was now standing in his foyer and awkwardly waiting to be shown where to wait. I wished we could’ve just dived in and got it done with immediately. But he had told me that he would need at least an hour to prepare. So instead, I took this time to look around and marvel at the wonder of his home. There was something foreign about it, like it was a model of how he wanted to be seen, but it wasn’t him. I could’ve been wrong. Perceiving people and their intentions wasn’t a strong suit of mine. Michelle always told me I would have to work on that. I was gazing at his Victorian-style furniture and gawking at the magnificent crystal chandelier hanging slightly above me when I heard his footsteps descending from the top of the stairs. That’s when I realized that he’d been a long minute putting my bag away. It wasn’t alarming, but it wasn’t courteous.

‘Sorry about that,’ he said, ‘I was making sure everything was quite in order. I haven’t been here in a while and haven’t had a guest in months.’

‘That’s okay. If it all goes well, I likely won’t have to stay. I need to get back as soon as possible. But thank you,’ I said. He smiled as he showed me into the adjacent room, the living room.

Indeed, almost everything was covered in white cloth which showed his absence. It didn’t look dusty, which I thought helped to maintain something graceful about it all. He pulled away a few and invited me to sit. I thanked him. He brought me a nice cup of tea in a fancy porcelain set and then excused himself again. I was left in an eerie silence and prayed for a distraction. Then, looking around, something caught my eye. It was incredible. In the corner of the room to my right, by the large French windows, was an incredibly tall dollhouse. I carefully set my cup down and walked over to it. It looked immaculate, like it had only recently been made. As I bent over and peered closer, I remembered an oddly coincidental fact from my date with Andrei the other day. He had told me he was a dollhouse maker. A quirk which at first took me a while to register. As a child, dolls and dollhouses spooked me. The appeal of building something miniature like that was something I never quite understood. But fortunately, it was something I no longer felt as strongly about and with Andrei’s revelation, I was ready to accept it. As he explained the art of making them, I saw his passion. That is what I used now as I combed through the fine intricacies of the small house before me. The details were impeccable. I began to imagine a workman filing wood for the walls and chipping away notches for the doors… I began to imagine Andrei. Suddenly, I heard a car coming into the driveaway. I came out of my reverie and quickly went over to the window. There was nothing. But the engine I had heard had sounded very real, not part of my little daydream. Regardless, I brushed it off. I would later come to regret this.

I came back to the dollhouse and continued to look through it. There was a beautiful white fence that enclosed a bed of artificial green grass and that seemed to make me very happy. The fence had an unusual pattern, but that only made me want to touch it. I did. Bumpy and rugged, and what my fingers felt was something all too familiar. I stared hard at the pattern and it clicked in the most revolting way. What I had been touching… were teeth!

With perfect timing as always, right when I was in the middle of gazing at something, the good dentist reappeared. I saw him peripherally, but I couldn’t seem to take my eyes off the many teeth I could now see, everywhere! I glanced over at him and saw his wide grin.

‘Why?’ I asked. By now, he knew I had uncovered his secret.

‘I like the textures they give me.’ The response sent a long chill down my spine. So, custom made then? I thought. And from how many mouths? Dead mouths… Were there actually people who did this sort of thing, give away teeth for aesthetic building purposes? I tried to visualize it but that possibility was something I wasn’t ready to accept. Just then, the front door opened, and closed. Someone had come in. So, I had heard it right earlier with the imaginary car. The person walked in and my eyes widened in horror. This was not good; anyone could see that now.

‘Ah, Rachel, nice of you to join us. Come, sit.’ he gestured. It was my beloved new suitor, Andrei.

My jaw dropped. Of course, this had all been a sinister ruse to lure me down here. I chuckled nervously. I always did when I was cornered. I tucked a lose strand of red hair behind my ear and gulped. A dentist, a dollhouse maker who specialized in teeth as his main medium of choice, and me. Andrei, oh dear Andrei, what had you gotten me into?