The Light That Is Given

Sam and Mia stood in the middle of the living room. They were both silent. Mia’s arms had been crossed since she walked in and Sam looked around the room for a distraction - anything that would allow him to not have to look Mia in the eyes.

“The plants are dead.”

“Yes, Sam. They’ve been dead for a while.”

Sam gently rubbed one of the dried-up leaves and watched as it crumbled between his fingers. The debris fell to the floor, some of it even got on his socks, but he didn’t care. When did he ever care about anything? Not for a while, that’s for sure. At least not according to his sister.

“C’mon, let's go get you into the shower. You reek right now,” Mia said, trying to guide him towards the bathroom.

“No, I really am not in the mood,” Sam retorted as he brushed her hand off of his shoulder. Sam was very annoyed at Mia for showing up unannounced and proudly wore a look of discomfort on his face for her being there.

“Does it matter if you’re in the mood if you smell that badly?” she responded.

Sam was silent. 

Sam’s living room stood dark and musty as if the fresh air had failed to find its entrance into the house for so long that it just gave up. The houseplants were dead, but it smelled like possibly something else had died too, though Mia had quickly decided that she would not explore the source. She was dressed in dark attire. An all-black dress was hugged tightly to her figure and fell just below her knees. Her heels, purse, the sunglasses that hung from the top opening of her dress, and her sunhat all matched. She stood out like a sore thumb in front of Sam, who wore sweatpants that seemed just a little too large around the waist as they sagged ever so slightly. He wore a wrinkled shirt that was most likely one of the causes of the many smells floating around in his house - it was either that or possibly his socks, or both, Mia thought to herself.

Mia stood there waiting for Sam to respond to her, but he was not going to.

“You missed the funeral. I know you knew it was today,” Mia continued. Sam could hear the sadness in her voice. 

“Why does that matter,” he responded.

But before he even had a chance to finish his sentence, Mia quickly jabbed back at him, “Because she was our mom… I mean, is our mom.”

Sam, still silent, hung his head a little lower.

“I just couldn’t be there,” he said quietly as if he was just speaking to himself.

“People were expecting you, Sam. The whole family. Do you know how many times I had to explain to people that I didn’t know why you hadn’t shown up yet?” Mia went on, “It was embarrassing.”

Sam's eyes began to swell with tears. He looked away to hide them from Mia, but this only made her more frustrated with him. 

“Look at me!” Mia demanded.

Sam quickly turned to face his sister, showing her, with an angry expression, that the tears he had been trying to hide were now running down his face.

“What, Mia? What do you want me to say?” he said in a loud, angry tone, “Do you want me to apologize for not showing up? For not being as strong and put-together as my big sister?”

Mia was taken aback, she didn’t know how to respond and her usual know-it-all attitude had quickly left her being.

Sam continued on, “I don’t know what you want from me - showing up here like you own the place. This is my house! And you just walk in here and expect me to just flip a switch and be strong like I hadn’t been crying my brains out for the last two weeks. She wasn’t supposed to go out like that. I didn’t even get to say goodbye. I didn’t even get to… apologize,” the last few words barely left his mouth and were hardly comprehensible as he began to sob. He dropped to the floor and sat there, crying into his hands.

Mia got down with him.

“Sam… Look. I’m sorry.” she said apologetically as she gently rubbed his back, “I’m sorry, I didn’t realize you two were fighting.”

Sam, between his sobs, let out, “She’ll never know… how sorry I am.”

Mia’s eyes began to tear up as well. They sat there in silence once more, but now, Mia was comforting Sam. A few moments had passed and then Sam broke the silence.

“I’m sorry, Mia,” he said to her quietly.

“I’m sorry, too,” she said back.

Mia pulled herself up off of the floor of Sam’s living room and extended her hand out to Sam. He looked at it for a second, debating whether or not to take it. He felt comfortable where he was at - like this is what he deserved - where he belonged. Mia, however, did not pull away.

“Please take my hand, Sam,” she said. She thought to herself that if he would just take her hand, then maybe she would be able to help him.

Sam reluctantly took it, and she pulled him up off of the floor.

Mia looked Sam in the eyes as if she wanted her point to be very clear, “You want to show her you’re sorry? You need to honor her. This is not what she would have wanted, you know that, right? For you to just sit here and waste way - this is not it.”

Sam let off a small nod.

Mia continued, “Honor her, Sam. Clean yourself up, go take a shower, and we might still have time to make the last half of the reception. Be the person she knew that you were, even through your fight with her.”

Sam stood there, thinking.

“Sam…” Mia pleaded.

“Okay… I’ll go,” Sam finally agreed. 

Mia smiled softly, “Good. I will wait for you. We can go there together.”

He walked down the hall and into his bedroom. After a few moments, Mia could hear the sound of the shower starting and the water running through the pipes in the walls. She made her way over to his couch and sat there, looking around his dirty living room. Mia couldn’t let it remain in such disarray, so she got up and started to pick up a few things.

A few minutes later, after the sound of the shower had stopped and Sam had got dressed in a much nicer outfit, he walked back out to the living room. Mia had just finished doing a quick tidying up of the place. She reached over the couch to the curtains that were covering up the window and swung them open. The bright light finally made its way into the house, lighting up the room and shining right into Sam’s eyes, making him squint.

Mia looked at Sam and smiled.

“You look much better,” Mia said.

Sam responded with the slightest of grins, “Thank you. I feel much better.”