I Do

My voices, my voices always telling me things. Things that I love. I know I'm a psychic. I know these things will come true. I know in not schitzophrenic. The doctors dont have a blood test, that tells me so. Until then I am completely sane. Whether or not the doctors know it, all my voices care for me, and me for them. In fact one of them really wants a relationship with me I just know it.

It started when I was in the bathtub. He kept saying, " okay here it goes, will you marry me" a sweet Male voice said. I thought about it. Wondering who this handsome, ( of course) being was, it was all I could do to contain my glee. Finally at 32 years old I Mona-Lee would be married. The whole world would know, that I wasn't crazy and I would invite them all. Even the demons could attend if they were well behaved. I would wear white and he would wear a black tuxedo. Our flowers would match. All my sisters would be my bridesmaids. The people in my head would all be there, and we would know each other and get together for a board game of MY CUSTOMS CARGO, orALIEN PICKUP,or, BATS IN YOUR BELLFRY. Yes, we would have some real good times together. None of us would even have to talk, cause we are all each others voices. This is the New Age you know. A lot of people are the way we all are, advanced, yes advanced. I hurried out of the bathtub, and set my hair. Then I put on some lipstick and waited. I brushed my teeth twice. I waited and I waited. Sometimes these remote marriage propositions take time, right? That's what I think too!

My wife and I have been married for 21 years. I always believed that we knew each other were thinking, but not only this, we always spoke at the same time, and answered our associates. They would laugh, when we spoke simultaneously. Her and I would do our little " ooh punch buggy no return," thing everytime we spoke in sync, and punch each other in the arm. I almost feared, that maybe some people called us the punch buggies. Oh my goodness, wouldn't that be funny. Even funnier, than the way we always spoke at the same time. Well when I asked her to marry me, in my mind, practising my proposal, she would even answer me. I would say, " darling , I have this huge diamond for you, you know". She would reply " seriously are you kidding, a big diamond". I said" yes honey, a great big, huge diamond on a band of gold". She told me once, in my head, that she was just getting out, and to come to the door. So I drove to her restaurant, and asked for her hand. My new fiance told me I was the man for her. I couldn't figure out if she had another suitor, at some time or another as sometimes she would say " I cant wait to see you" even when I was with her, but I brushed these inner thoughts of mine away. Enjoying her company, as I always did. Although, when she said when are you coming over, and I came on over to her( if you know what I mean). She would say " honey not tonight", it became confusing, after some time, as I wondered, if she always was playing hard to get.

Well, I mona-Lee was going to be a bride. So I made sure my hair was fixed every day. My makeup was impeccable. My manners WITH all humans, were, I'm sure equal with the queens. Would I have a June wedding perhaps? No, no no Valentines day yes. He would be arriving soon I knew. He had just said to me, that we would go have Italian cuisine. I love italian cuisine. He still hasn't shown up yet. It's been three weeks, I'll wait for him to find me. Maybe he went to my old address. I never even thought of that. I turned 33 yesterday, he didn't say happy birthday, he must have forgot.

My wife and I before we were married, were not only some kind of exact, speech telepathic, but everytime I spoke to her, I believed she would answer me inside my head. Like, I would say honey let's go out for Alfredo and garlic toast okay. Then before I asked her she would say,(telepathically) " I love that food or something like that. Then out loud in front of me she would say yes I'd love to go for dinner for Alfredo honey, but we just had it last week, how about Chinese. I asked her out loud. I'm pretty sure in my head she really wanted Alfredo again and garlic toast. Huh, women, they can be confusing. Sometimes, I just wished she would admit, that we were so much alike, that it was almost like she read my thoughts. So weird, mine and hers relationship. I really love italian.

Mona-Lee, will you stop looking out the darn window, I told myself. It's been eight months, since he telepathically, asked for your hand, and offered you that big ring, with the golden band around it. Just then Simon walked up the walk, he was handsome enough, but God I hope he didn't have that ring in that little box he had in his hand. " Hi Simon" I opened up the door. " Sure would like to know what's that box Simon" I asked him very quietly. " ITS A BOX OF COOKIES I JUST MADE FOR YOU, MONA-Lee" he yodeled. "OH"! "For me" I said with, a sorry of a surprised look. I was quite sure for some time that it had been Simon talking to me in my voices. But you never know.

I'm fifty three now. Yes Mona-Lee is fifty three. I'm still single. I know I'm not a crazy lady. Why, with all of those first and secoond generation antiphsychotics and all. I know he loves me. If he says " honey, do you want to go to walmart with me" I say "yes, I'll meet you there at three". He hasn't come to those appointments yet, but i do think that that big, fat, diamond ring is still waiting for me.

My wife and I, like two peas in a pod. We love each other, unconditionally. I still talk to her in my head and see what she wants for dinner and such and such. She always answers me

Lately she's been a little frustrated., but I dont see it in her face. Just all in my head I guess.She always wonders where I am. She knows I'm at work all day, I hope my wife of over two decades doesnt think I'm cheating on her. I think from now on instead of talking to her silently I will ask her all of my questions out loud and get answers aloud as well. I am not insane, but she must want another large diamond ring or something, cause she keeps repeating to me " wheres that big diamond sweetie". This os what she says to me telepathically. Huh, I guess it's time to go shopping again.

I'm 54 tomorrow and I finally met my man. He busks and I sing, we make a lot of money together. He says that big diamond, that he was just trying to lure me in, a long time ago. My diamond is coming soon. We saved up a 190 dollars so far. He told me when I didn't show up that he threw the old one out the window. We are real happy. Just think, me, Mona-Lee a married woman, with a real man. Simon moved on, with cookies for some other gal. Im gonna be bride soon.