Journey

25.2

Sarah climbed back into the boat, pushed off the dock, and turned on the engine as the smell of gasoline filled the air and the first dribble of rainfall fell onto her coat. (Who, where).

Ten minutes later, as rain drops fell hard on Sarah and the mist became like a curtain, Sarah pulled at the collar of her raincoat. (Theme signal)

She wanted to go home. She wanted to get back in bed with Annalee and tell her Mommy loves her and she’s sorry for not being there before. That after tonight things will change. And this time, she means it. She really(Character Reveal, Character Strength, Character Flaw)

“I just want to go back to the cabin, not any further. I think I left it underneath the couch,” Sarah said. (Scene goal)

“Didn’t you check like three times?” Edgar said, looking back at her. (Character Reveal)

“I just want to make sure,” Sarah said.

Sarah watched Edgar as he sat at the front of boat. His muddied Yankees was off kilter, even before it started raining, and his neck hair seemed to extend past his rain coat. (Character Reveal, Character Description). He turned around, and said, “I have somewhere else I want to go instead.” (Open milieu)

Sarah was about to speak when a ripple of water slammed against the hull of the boat. She fell forward, catching herself on the empty seat in front. Pain shot through her hand, and when she looked down drops of blood were forming inside her palm.

“Damn splinter,” Sarah said.(Character Reveal: Toughness)

“Did you hear what I said,” Edgar said.

“I just want to get back to the cabin, and then go home. Annalee is waiting for me and you know we shouldn’t have done this anyway,” Sarah said. (Scene Goal, Character Reveal, does something that she knows is wrong. Leaving her kid, whom she cares about, at home.)

Edgar turned around, then took a seat next to her. He leaned in close, his hand gentry brushing against her leg, “I want to show you something. It’s a place…not to far from here. Your daughter is already asleep right? So what’s a few more hours?”(Character Reveal: Edgar: Selfish.

“No, I need – ”

“We just have to be careful, that’s all. But we should fine.”

Scene 2

8.29.1.1

Thirty minutes passed when Edgar finally slows the boat. In front of them is a small mountain, with an impasse barely visible as the rain continued to come down on them. Edgar climbed out of the boat, then offered a hand to Sarah. He smiled at her, the way he did when they were kids. Like some secret existed between the two of them that is forbidden to talk about.

“If I didn’t trust you so much, I’d say that you’re scaring me,” Sarah said, as she leaned on Edgar and then climbed out of the boat(Character Reveal: She trusts him : Emotion reveal: Fear)

She watched him, as he pulled the boat onto, then tied it a thick tree just off the river bank. His shoulders rose and fell, and even though some of the buttons his rain coat are missing and the laces to his shoes are still untied, there’s a focus to him that she hasn’t seen. The thought of way they are going, and its safe. It’s eating away at her. (Emotional tension)

“Follow me,” he said.

“Tell me where we are going first,” Sarah said. (Scene Goal: Sarah wants to find out where we are going)

“You’ll be home soon. Back with Annalee,” Edgar said, then he turned around and started walking toward the impasse.

“We have to stop doing this. We have to stop running away to do…whatever it is that we’re doing. I know you’ve had a hard year but –”

Edgarb nodded and said, “Lets not do this. Not here, Either come with me or you can wait by the fucking boat.”

Water rushed against the hull, pulling at the rope. Her eyes darted around her, the trees and darkness between. She can’t help but feel like she’s being watched.

“Sometimes I think spending time with you is going to get me killed,” she said, turning away from the boat.”

Edgar smiled at her, but as she smiled back Sarah could tell, something was off with Edgar. There was excitement in his voice, but fear was gripping at him, pulling him somewhere deep. She placed his around his shoulder, wondering what he wasn’t telling her. (Micro tension)

Scene 3

Rainwater dripped from the walls of the cave, falling onto Sarah’s hands as her fingers traced along the granite. (Who, where)

Every few steps Sarah looked back toward the entrance of the cave where the light from the moon and stars were still strong, and the stink of the sickly river water reminded her she wasn’t far from the boat back home. But the further they went, an hour or now more deep into the cave, and Sarah knew if anything happened it would be weeks or even months before they found her.?(Anxiety. Look back, Look forward.)

They’d been going for an hour now, possibly more. Every time she had asked how much longer, Edgar got increasingly annoyed so she stopped asking. She wondered how he could seem so adamant about going somewhere, and then not know exactly where they going. (Look back, look forward)

“Can you at least tell me how much longer,” Sarah said? (Scene Goal: Get more information about where they are going)

“We’re here,” Edgar said, turning around.

His face was half concealed by shadows. There was a hint of anger in his words, small but prevalent. Sarah take a step back.

Edgar told her how it worked. How to move to the space beyond where they were. He told her to stick her hand like she was doing, and walk until its get’s dark. So dark that you can see anything. When you can no longer feel the wall you’ll know your close. Then, he took another step forward, and said, “the most important thing is that you cannot stop. You have to keep going.

“What will happen if I stop?” Sarah said.

“I don’t want to think about that?” Edgar said.

“Why would I not be able to hear you?” Sarah said(Emotion: Anxiety)

“This is not a normal place, but I think it might help you. I think its helping me,” Edgar said.

Can I ask you something?” Sarah said, her had already trembling because she really didn’t want to be here, but couldn’t bring herself to leave.

“Yes,” Edgar said. “And then we have to go.”

“Why do you want to be here?”

“If everyone has their reasons for being here. Even you.”

Sarah placed her hand on Edgar’s shoulder. His muscle felt firm but gentle in her hand, and she wanted to feel safe, and thought that maybe she would feel safe with him, but that faded as soon as the feeling of the granite on her palms disappeared. The darkness within the cave was so absolute that she could no longer see her arms. There comfort of hearing the water dropping from the cave fell away, bringing a silence that caused each footstep to echo through her. (Emotional tension)

But the worse things that happened, was the feeling of Edgar’s shoulders fall away from her grasp. As soon as she noticed he was gone, she called out for him. And then, again, she called out for him. Still, there was nothing. Worse still, the cave seemed to swallow her voice. When she called out, she could barely even hear her own voice.

She took a few more steps into the cave, remembering what Edgar has told her about not stopping, and said “Not without you. I’m not doing this without you.”

Still, she kept walking. And that’s when she heard it. A grumbled voice that echoed through the walls. It wasn’t Edgar, she knew that. It was a voice she recognized immediately.

“Please,” she said, falling to her knees.

She closed her eyes, then fell to ground.