Claire Jensen stared at the blinking cursor on her laptop screen like it was taunting her. The white page glared back, bright as judgment. Her fingers hovered above the keys, but the thoughts dissolved the second she tried to shape them into sentences.
She sat hunched in the corner of the café, hoodie sleeves stretched over her hands, a lukewarm coffee dying beside her. She couldn’t afford another one. She probably shouldn’t have bought the first. She still had two freelance pieces due that would barely cover her half of rent, but this was her writing hour, dammit.
It had been five years. Not just five years writing—five years being this novel. Plot outlines, deleted drafts, sleepless nights, sticky notes on her bathroom mirror, back pain, migraines, relationships withering like unwatered plants. Every version of herself in that time had been chasing this thing. Her novel. Her “one shot.”
Now it sat unfinished. Like a half-built bridge. She knew the ending. It was right there. A finger width away. But reaching for it now felt like lifting a limb she no longer believed in.
She shut the laptop. Not slammed—just gently shut it. That was the scariest kind of giving up: the quiet kind. No drama. Just the soft surrender of someone too tired to keep pretending.
---
She walked home under a low, gray sky, past construction cones and flickering neon signs, her tote bag heavy with rejection. She passed a bookstore and turned her face away. She used to go in and feel inspired. Now, all she saw were things she hadn’t written. Lives she hadn’t lived.
Her apartment was small and cold in that specific, old-radiator way. She dumped her laptop on the couch and checked her phone.
No messages.
She opened Instagram. Big mistake. Another writer she knew had landed a book deal—smiling next to stacks of ARCs, beaming like the sun had personally endorsed her. Claire tapped the heart icon, then immediately un-tapped it. She dropped the phone like it burned.
In the kitchen, the only food left was stale cereal and a half-eaten bag of spinach that had gone limp in the crisper. She poured some cereal, sat at the counter, and scrolled through old emails—forty-six unanswered agent queries, five rejections, one said: "This is close. Just not quite there."
“Close,” Claire muttered aloud. “Story of my life.”
---
That night, she lay in bed with her laptop on her chest. Half a paragraph stared up at her. She deleted it. The same way she had deleted a hundred others this month.
She opened a blank email draft.
Subject: Putting the novel to rest
Body:
Hi everyone,
After a lot of thought, I’ve decided to shelve the novel for the foreseeable future. Thank you all for your support along the way.
She didn’t send it. Just hovered her mouse over “Send” until her chest hurt, then closed the window. Maybe tomorrow. Or maybe never.
For a moment, she imagined herself taking a 9–5 job in marketing. Something stable. Something that didn’t leave her in debt. A version of her life where no one expected greatness. Just bills paid on time and room to breathe.
There was peace in that. And sadness too. Like a melody played just a half-step off.
---
She woke the next morning to an email with no subject line. From a stranger.
> Hi Claire—
> I found your story, Driftwood Dreams, online last night. I just wanted to say thank you. It made me feel like I wasn’t alone. I’ve been in a really dark place lately. Your words helped. Please keep writing.
> —Lila
Claire stared at the screen until the words blurred. It was only three lines. One reader. But somehow, it felt like air rushing into a vacuum.
She made coffee, wrapped herself in a blanket, and opened the document again. Not to write—just to read. She expected to cringe. But instead, something in the prose flickered with life. It wasn’t perfect. But it was *her*.
Maybe she didn’t need fifty agents. Maybe she just needed to finish the damn thing.
---
The next two weeks were a quiet kind of war. She wrote every morning at 6:00 a.m., phone in a drawer, calendar cleared. She still did freelance work at night—copywriting gigs, ad blurbs, product descriptions—but her mornings belonged to the novel. She promised herself: one page a day. That was all.
Some days it took hours. Other days it poured out like water.
She finished it on a Tuesday. No one was there. No champagne. Just the ‘save’ button and the sound of a pigeon hitting her window.
She didn’t cry. She didn’t scream. She just sat there, blinking. It didn’t feel like triumph. It felt like coming up for air.
---
Three months later, she got the email. A real agent. A real offer. Subject line: Loved your manuscript. Can we talk?
She didn’t scream. She didn’t even open it right away. She was folding laundry. She figured it was another polite “no.” But when she finally clicked it open, her knees nearly buckled.
They liked her book. They wanted to represent her.
She read it three times before believing it was real.
---
Even after the contract was signed, she waited for the catch. For the agent to realize they’d made a mistake. For someone to say, “Actually, we meant someone else.”
And yet—months later, there she was in a real bookstore, holding a real book with her name on the spine. Matte cover. Crisp pages. The title in embossed gold.
She thought she’d feel whole. But she didn’t. Not exactly.
She felt… real.
She thought of sixteen-year-old Claire, scribbling stories in notebooks. She thought of crying in cafes, watching other writers “make it.” She thought of how close she had come to giving up.
And how lucky she was that she didn’t.
---
Epilogue
She still worried. About the next book. About reviews. About whether she was “a fluke.”
But sometimes, she got emails. Like Lila’s.
> I read your book. I saw myself in it. Thank you.
Those were the moments that felt like gold.
Success didn’t come with fireworks. It came with quiet. With breath. With the soft, steady realization that you had been right to believe in yourself—even when no one else did.
You must sign up or log in to submit a comment.