***mentions of abuse, violence***
The raindrops poured down Masa’s dark hair and onto her face. Her soaked hair clung to her skin. The dress she wore to blend in with the other women was soaked. Crouching, she gripped the knife’s leather hilt, the leather band slippery from the rain and mud. She longed for the familiar feel of her handgun, but that was against the rules of engagement the women had agreed upon. There were to be no guns tonight, only daggers and poison.
Lightning lit the sky, highlighting the faces of the women beside her. All dressed the same and all carrying daggers. Their heads were covered with scarves to conceal one woman from the next. Tonight, there were no groups or cartels, only women. All others were the target.
Loretta stood beside the door at the head of their group, saying, “Remember, we get in, and our priority is to find the men and get them across the bridge. The other groups will take care of opening the bridge for the men, knocking their husbands out, and removing the remaining stores of food from the bridge.”
“Do you have the directions?” asked one of the women.
Loretta repeated them, sketching out a rough design of the bridge and building in the mud with a stick. Everyone knew roughly where to go, but there was no telling what would happen once they were inside. Masa knew better than anyone that such plans did not last once the battle began and even the best-laid plans often had flaws.
“They should be done drugging the men soon,” Loretta said, her lips pursed to one side. She wrung her hands, before running her hand over the bump at her waist and smiling as if reassuring the child that everything would be alright.
The heavy metal door screeched open, and a small woman waved them in. It was hard to make out her form in the light of the hurricane lantern she carried, but the bruises running along her arms were evident along with the dark ring surrounding her eyes. The cartels were rumored for poorly treating their women, no wonder they were willing to follow Loretta’s lead. “I’m Sofia. The men are all asleep,” she said and laughed. “All asleep….” A chill ran down Masa’s spine at Sofia’s demeanor. From between the women in front of her, Masa saw the dagger at Sofia’s side was dripping with blood which ran along the floor.
Sofia led them around corners, passing by more bodies. All had their throats cut. “Look how they sleep,” she whispered. It was clear the small woman had no intention of letting the men who had hurt her live. “I will leave you now,” she said, handing the lantern to Loretta before she ran off into the darkness.
“I don’t think everything is going quite to plan,” Loretta muttered, leading them through the series of corridors toward the cells for holding detainees. The lantern flickered when they passed by windows blown open by the storm winds. They were picking up rain, flinging it inside.
Down several flights of stairs, they climbed, and through more dimly lit corridors. Stone gave way to white-washed concrete with tiled floors. Screams rang out above them, echoing through the halls. The smell of smoke joined the wind as they entered the corridor containing the cells of their men. The grate at the end of the hall glowed with chaos down below, occasionally lit by the lightning strikes. The women scattered, crying out the names of their men.
“Leron,” Masa cried, searching each cell for the man she loved. The men ran towards their women reuniting with them. The keys were found, and the doors forced open. People began rushing past her towards the stairs. “Leron?” Masa yelled, but no response.
“Masa, over here!” cried Arion, his hands wrapped around the bars.
Masa glared at him, her hands pale and shaking. Where was Leron? “What did you do to him? You got rid of him, didn’t you? You just couldn’t help yourself.”
“How dare you!” he yelled before the weakness from being in the cell appeared to set in. He hung his head, rubbing his eyes, “I would never.”
“You would! I’m…..I’m….” Masa said, her tone rising to that of a screech. She pulled out her knife.
“Enough you two!” Loretta growled, coming up behind her, and nudging her out of the way. “Where are Manuel and Leron?” she demanded, unlocking the door.
Arion rushed through, going to his knees and wrapping his arms around Masa's waist. Disgusted, she tried to push him away, but he wouldn’t let her go. “Masa, I swear, I didn’t harm him. I was trying to keep him alive…and….and I’m sorry...” he croaked, tears streaming down his face. He whimpered and buried his head.
Masa gripped the knife, fully prepared to stab him, but her anger melted away. Arion was so pathetic. He was crying like a child. Leron. Tears fell down her cheeks. She sheathed her knife and fell to her knees, crying into Arion's chest.
Arion wrapped his arms around her. “I tried to get Leron to shut up, but he’d given up. I was going to go in his place. Masa, I’m so sorry.” Arion faced Loretta, “They were both taken along with Francisco and Gael. I don’t know where, but they never came back.”
Masa pulled away, climbed to her feet, and began to head towards the stairs.
“Where are you going?” Loretta asked.
“I have to find him.”
“I’m coming with you,” Arion said, chasing after her.
Masa turned, pulling her knife on him again. “Don’t ever come near me again.”
“I won’t,” he said, “I was wrong to treat you that way. Leron helped me see that. Let me help and once we escape, and…and… you’ll never see me again.”
“Good.”
“I’m coming, too,” Loretta said, “I’m not leaving without Manuel. Besides, you’ll need my help to navigate this place.”
“Where do we start?” asked Arion.
“The women’s quarters,” Loretta said, “One of them will know what happened.”
Loretta led them up an endless number of stairs. Time seemed to fly by, and Masa feared morning would arrive soon. What if everyone had already left the bridge and escaped? Thoughts of how the other women and men were doing filled her mind and what of the supplies? Would they all make it to the other side of the bridge? Everything had taken so long to prepare; too long. And now this. More tears began to well up, but she fought them back.
They arrived above ground in the large building, passing by windows revealing the chaos outside on the bridge. The rain had stopped and a gunfight had broken out. Screams filled the air, and several large wooden crates had caught fire. It was clear with the sheer number of people crossing the bridge that they were winning.
Loretta groaned, gripping her side and letting out a long string of profanity.
“Are you alright?” Masa asked.
“Yes, we’re not far now,” Loretta said, hunched over. “Oooh…”
“I’ll help you,” Arion said, taking Loretta’s arm. Masa took the other.
“Well, you're not quite as bad as I thought you were,” Loretta said, giving him a look of approval.
Masa frowned at him, wondering what he was up to, and caught him staring at her. The hardness in his eyes softened, filled with guilt and he looked away and chatted with Loretta like nothing was wrong. Their casual conversation amidst the distant gunfire and explosions was unnerving, but it did serve as a distraction.
At the top of the stairs, they walked down a long hall and entered a room filled with roughly constructed beds. Great windows looked down on the chaos down below. The cords running along the wall indicated this had once been some sort of office, but the desks had all been ripped out in favor of beds. The room was filled with women. Mostly younger and older, but a small group who seemed out of place sat beside the door deep in discussion. They stopped and stared at them, going rigid with fright. Like the girl called Sofia, many of them were bruised.
“It’s okay, we’re not here to attack. We need your help,” Loretta said, her palms held up. One of the women by the door stood and embraced Loretta. Loretta smiled and patted the woman’s back, “I know, Brie. You’ve all done so well.” Loretta pushed the woman called Brie back, placing her hands on her shoulders and meeting her eyes. “Brie, we need your help. We’re looking for where they took the Monterrey council.”
“Your council was taken across the bridge earlier today,” said one of the women.
“Do you know where they are now?”
The woman wouldn’t meet Loretta’s gaze. “We didn’t get to the men in time. A group of them skipped dinner to deal with them. Your council wouldn’t give up the location of your base and...and they were executed out on the bridge.”
Loretta gasped, gripping the edge of the bed.
“No…” Masa cried, backing away. She collapsed onto a nearby bed in shock. Leron had been her only friend. He had always kept things in perspective, never giving in to the pressures of the world around him. All her hopes lay dashed. They had worked so hard. The dam of tears gave way, and she began to weep. She hid her head in her hands, distinctly aware of the conversation continuing behind her.
“I’m sorry,” Brie whimpered, “We didn’t mean to.”
“I know, it just seems to be the way things are,” Loretta whispered. “We need to get out of here. Brie, you and the others should leave too,” Loretta said, her tone filled with determination.
“We have nowhere to go,” Brie said.
“Come with us,” Loretta suggested, “You shouldn’t have to live like this.”
“We don’t know anything else, and it's worse out there.”
“But you fought, you have to leave,” Loretta pleaded. "Your husbands will do worse to you now."
“No. And please respect that.”
A long silence followed, “Arion, help get Masa to her feet.”
Masa felt Arion take hold of her arm, gently pulling her towards him. “Come on Masa,” he whispered, swinging her feet over the edge of the bed. He pulled her toward him and held her. “Leron loved you more than anything. I think it was the only thing that kept him going.”
Masa managed a weak nod, enjoying the closeness, but longing for the one she had lost.
Arion kissed her hair, “Let’s go find their bodies. They deserve to be buried.”
It was all so surreal. The three of them descended the stairs together, arm in arm. They passed by the fires and the muted cries of people who ran by them. Families cried out in excitement at seeing one another. The crowds they had seen crossing the bridge before had thinned out. The rest of the Monterrey group stood beneath the awning.
Masa picked up her pace, and she and Loretta broke into a run, pushing their way through the crowd. Loretta screamed, and ran to one of the bodies, bursting into tears. She clutched Manuel's life his form to her chest and wailed.
Masa walked from body to body, still in a state of shock. She recognized Francisco and Gael, “Where’s Leron?” In a panic, she took hold of someone nearby, “Where is he? Did you move him?”
At hearing her desperation, Filipe appeared. “Come with me,” he said.
Masa followed him, aware that Arion was following close behind. They approached the American end of the international bridge. The wails behind them grew in volume and Masa wondered if she should be with Loretta.
“Almost everyone is accounted for,” Filipe said, “We found Gael before he died and he managed to let me know. Leron was taken elsewhere by an American woman. They were going to try and break him.”
“Where?” Masa demanded. "Why would they still want him?"
“I don't know. A large group of the men on this side of the bridge weren’t drugged,” Filipe explained, “When everyone tried to escape and the rest of the men from Nuevo Laredo arrived, a gunfight broke out. They were overwhelmed and evacuated. They had old military vehicles and escaped into Laredo. There’s no telling where they went.”
Masa nodded, struggling to form words. She was overjoyed that Leron was alive but terrified she would never be able to find him again.
“We’ll find him,” Arion said, coming up behind her and wrapping his arm around her. Masa flinched, pushing him away.
“No, I will go and find him,” she spat.
"Neither of you will be doing anything," growled Filipe, "Not until we gather our dead and reach the meeting point. Only then, will we decide who goes after Leron."
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2 comments
Well crafted sentences and flow. Good balance of dialogue, action, and description. Good momentum drawing the reader through it and good creation of characters and relationships. There is a lot happening here. I am writing in a different genre but I see the skillful writing techniques here. Very visual and with all the dialogue and action it could be an episode in a screenplay too.
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Moral of the story: Never agree to "no guns". (Especially if you are anywhere near Nuevo Laredo or Ciudad Juarez or anyplace like that. Never bring a knife to a fight with the cartel. Low probability move.) Great story. Nice job, KC!
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