Forest of Virtue

The morning calls of the birds awake me, the glimmer of sunlight through the window shrinking down on my face. It’s time to get up. Mother Nature has awoken me and says it’s time to start a new day. There is never a wasted day in the forest, always something to do or achieve. For me that goal is to work toward my career, to live a life of pureness and morality and to communicate the beauty of nature to the world. I draw for a living, I paint for living, I write for a living. I am the true definition of an artist, creating multiple works of human emotion that can be both understood and refused by the masses. For every person that understands my art, there are several extras that consider it a waste of time and money.

My father, as dear as I loved him, was one of those people. A man who would never sleep without turning a profit, a man who would cut off his own hand if it meant saving a few cents. Instead of cutting off his own hand, he threw out the plates of others. He owned a chain restaurant, very popular across the country, but was a corruptible man. Overpriced specials, adding and subtracting items for no reason, and insane reservation prices for special events. He disposed of his competition so that he could keep these high prices, either through partnership or twisting legal codes. It was corrupt, it was immoral, but to him it was "just business”.

He was never supportive of my passion for art and writing. He hated that I spent my free time doing my passion instead of studying business and entrepreneurship. He wanted me to be him, but I wanted to be myself. It got to a point where we'd argue a lot, and eventually I just couldn’t take it. I wanted to be myself, to forge my own path, and I wanted to be nothing like him. So I went to the one place I knew I could be myself, the forest.

The forest is my inspiration for art, nobody truly understands it or tries to analyze it, they just make assumptions and run with it. Every animal in this forest has a life, has a purpose, and has a goal. The birds try to catch worms and teach each other how to fly, while the trees provide life to the world and protect species. The beavers build dams that humans deem “weird” or don’t truly understand, but they help to stop flooding that saves more humans than you’d think. Humans don’t understand beavers, but nature does, and that’s why I like it here. The animals understand each other, nature understands each other. Nature if the society humans should be, but aren’t.

Everyday I smile, seeing the lush green trees standing tall with authority, protecting nature while feeding its babies below. The sun shines down through the leaves, creating a natural light better than any light bulb. The birds fly with authority and confidence, not afraid of any poachers or threats. No foul creatures to terrorize them with stones or sounds, just the peace of nature and the breeze of the autumn air. Foxes travel in families nearby, keeping each other close and safe like a mother to her newborn baby. A lake sits right outside my backdoor, full of frogs and fish, protecting their babies and living with each other in mind. There’s no rebel, there’s no corruption, just love and care for each other, and that’s the beauty of nature. Humans depict nature as violent and unforgiving, yet it is us who are what we describe. We are violent, we are blood thirsty and unforgiving to each other. We are the true hypocrites of the world, a species that looks down on others yet has done nothing to deserve the respect or prestige we claim to have.

I walk over to the front porch, I always love to sit and enjoy the beauty of nature before breakfast. Sometimes a few birds come for me to feed them seeds, other days a family of foxes would be resting underneath the porch. It’s soothing to hear the sounds of the forest and the beauty of the ecosystem. I like to sketch drawings every morning, compare the differences and similarities and see how every organism has its place in nature. Father never understood it, but I did. Father…he was never the same after–nevermind, I shouldn’t think much about it. I just need to appreciate the world I live in, my new world with Mother Nature.

Today I decided to write some stories. It was raining so not many animals would be out to draw, and I’m not good with drawing rain yet. Writing is a great way of communication as well, though authors have been scrutinized and hated for their words, but I think it’s great writers express themselves or complicated topics. Living in fear of what the world thinks would prevent so many great texts and paintings from being made, and I don’t want to imagine a world where everyone was scared to take risks and be unique.

The sound of rain striking against the wooden roof while I had a lit candle and cup of coffee next to me was a calming vibe. It was just me, my thoughts and nature. The hard part was forming an idea and then writing the beginning, after that I’d be writing for hours. Writing is just a matter of finding your mind zone and having the right environment. That’s why I like being out in the woods, all peace and no distraction from human sin. I was quite enjoying myself, deep in my zone and entrenched into my own world, when suddenly–

Knock knock knock! A knock at the door, which surprised me. I’ve never received visitors since being in the forest. Not many people know about this cabin deep in the woods to begin with. Only me and a select few friends know about it from our old camping trips, but they’ve all moved out the city so there’s no way it could be them at the door. I hurry over to the door, no peephole so I open it up slightly, but the person I saw nearly made me jump back in surprise.

“Hailey!?” I scream in shock. I haven’t talked to my family in so long, not since the argument with dad. I never even told them where I was going nor sent any letters or texts to them since leaving. Yet here my little sister was, all alone deep in the neck of the woods at my door…come to think of it, why is she alone?

“Why did you come out here by yourself?” I ask.

“To take you home!” she replied, “We miss you.”

“You miss me, dad doesn’t.”

“He does, he just doesn’t know how to say it.”

“It isn’t hard to say ‘I miss you, I’m sorry’”

“Why won’t you two just make up?”

“If we’re gonna have this conversation you need to come inside out the rain.”

“Hmph, fine”, she said as she stormed in, with her signature stomping her feet to show that she’s angry. I pour a cup of coffee for her and give her a blanket, not sure why she decided to come out to the cabin in the pouring rain but I guess health doesn’t matter to teenagers. As I had her the cup I tell her again–

“I’m not going back home. I like it out here.”

“There’s nothing out here!” she objected. “How do you even text out here?”

“I have my ways.”

“There’s no stores out here.”

“I can go to the city, I’m not disabled.”

“And what do you do for fun?”

“I write and observe nature. Now do you have any more questions?”

She sunk down on the couch, pouting from my refusal to go back home.

“I just don’t get it”, she continued, “Why can’t you and dad just make up?”

“Nothing is between us, we’re on good terms.”

“Then why did you leave the house?”

“I wanted to follow my dreams.”

“So you yelled at father for an entire night?”

.”...Yes…yes I did.”

“And you never felt a need to apologize or speak to him again?”

“The person who’s right doesn’t need to apologize.” After that we sat in silence. I was focused on my writing, she was focused on her coffee. She just sat there, staring at her cup, occasionally glancing at me. I’d say something, but it’s none of my concern what she wants to talk about. I don’t feel like talking about my father, and I most certainly won’t in the morning. It's the first time I’ve seen Hailey in a long time and she comes talking about unnecessary topics, one of the reasons why I avoided contact with my family.

Soon it was noon, the rain had stopped pouring and Hailey got up.

“Could you at least give me your phone number before I go?” she pleaded.

“It’s the same phone number, I just don’t respond to your messages.”

“...”

“I suppose I’ll respond to them now, if you don’t tell dad.”

“Fine, I guess some people are just born to have daddy issues.”

“You act like you’re a saint.”

“I can talk to my parents without being sensitive, that’s just normal behavior.”

“Get out before I block your number.”

“Walk me back to the first entrance. Teach me about this world you live in.”

I scoff but agree. Maybe showing her the true beauty of nature will stop her from talking about dad. I really don’t feel like talking about him to people anymore, especially not my family since they always take his side. Although Hailey doesn’t necessarily have a side she’s on, it’s still clear she doesn’t understand my decision and leans toward dad’s side of the argument. And if I’m gonna let her text me, I can’t have her telling dad where I am.

We head out together, walking along the wet trail. There was already mud and fallen tree branches on the path, and this fool for a sister doesn’t understand the concept of watching your step. I have to hold her hand like a toddler so she doesn’t trip and injure herself. Above the path though, it was beautiful. A thin mist had set in after the rain, with a slight breeze rushing through the autumn air. Not too many animals were out, aside from a few birds high above in their nests, their chirping adding to the movie-like environment. It was like a scene of reflection and peace, but it was all short lived.

A distant sound of tapping can be heard in the distance, followed by the crushing of twigs and leaves. As far as I can remember, this part of the woods was untouched by humanity, and the only people who knew about it were me and now my sister. The sound got louder and louder until we heard a voice call out.

“Hailey! Hailey! Are you over here?”

Hailey bolted as soon she heard the voice, dashing through the wind like a deer running from a wolf. Without a word she left me far behind, I had to run as fast as I ever had to catch her. She wouldn’t say anything though, just quick feet and avoiding the voice. I’m certain she didn’t know where she was going, but she wanted to be away from that voice by any means. It was no use though, the voice of what sounded like a man kept getting louder, and soon he was on our tail. He had cut us off and popped out from a tree, grabbing Hailey by the arm.

“LET GO OF ME” she screamed and slashed his throat and eyes with a pocket knife. He fell to the ground, As if getting stabbed twice wasn’t enough, Hailey went and stabbed the poor bastard in the back.

“So we’re just murdering people now?” I asked, puzzled by what I had just seen.

“This man is a stalker! He tried to kidnap me!” she cried. “I asked for help from your cabin, he tried talking me to his house.”

“I think he was just a logger who was lost.”

“He’s a freak! I’m telling the truth!”

“Well that doesn’t mean you kill him.”

“No no he has a pulse!”

“You stabbed him three times, I’d bet a fortune he’s gone.”

“He’s not…maybe…” She bent down to feel for a pulse, feeling all over his body frantically. The moment she realized he was dead her face froze.

“What are we gonna do?” she asks.

“Well we could hide the body”, I responded. I was joking, not really sure how to get out of this situation, and it was her who killed him so that’s her problem. To my misfortune, Hailey still has not deciphered comedy.

“We could hide it in a lake, or a waterfall”, she said whilst picking up the body. “Help me career , will you?”

“This ain’t my crime”, I said. I really don’t want to be involved with this, and if I touch the body I become an accomplice and go to prison.

“If you don’t help dad has to get involved. And you’re a witness so they’ll find you.”

“Yeah and your point?”

“Well uh…your new life gets ruined and you might have to move out of the forest.”

I shuddered at that thought. No way my peace and quiet life would be ruined for some bullshit I had no business in. I wasn’t the one who hacked the man to death, nor did I tell her to do it. Yet I’m getting punished for this? Hell no. I look back at my sister, who could tell I was frustrated. She had the goofiest smirk on her face. She knew she got me.

“Alright, fine”, I said, “Let’s bury the body near the lake.”

“Wonderful you decided to help your little sis.”

“I hate you.”

We didn’t say another word after that, just on the off chance someone was lurking in the trees. We moved the body behind the lake near my cabin, digging as far as we could go, with extra depth so the body would be harder to find. A few buckets of water poured into the hole to try and distract anyone who may somehow find it into thinking it’s just an extension of the lake.

“Ah I’m pooped”, Hailey said. I could only stare at her with a thousand yard stare. My entire peace and happiness, the dreams I have, rest in the balance of a loudmouth 17 year old keeping a secret. Dear God, how did it come to this? I just wanted to write and paint in the forest, and now I’m involved in a murder.

“I think you should go home”, I say, “it’s almost time for dad to come home.”

“Awww you still remember his work schedule.”

“Tease me like that again and you’ll be next to that man in the dirt.”

“Ok ok”, she said, hurrying to the door. “Don’t forget to text me!”

I shrugged at her, and texted her number as soon as she closed the door. I guess I have to interact with some of my family now. Maybe it was delusional to think I could go the rest of my life without talking to my family, but damn I thought I was close. It just wasn’t meant to be.

Sigh I’m too tired for this I think to myself. I don’t even feel like finishing my writing today. Too much has happened, and too much is on my mind. I throw myself on the bed, stressed out of my mind. I’ll just make a big breakfast tomorrow to substitute not having dinner. My brain just can’t function right now, making dinner would be like solving rocket science. A good sleep would do wonders.

Sleeping through the night with today’s events on my mind, it just didn’t feel right. Having that murder on my conscience, burying him in Mother Nature’s home, it ate me alive. I tossed and turned, trying to find a comfortable position, but the bed felt harder than usual. Perhaps the guilt, perhaps nature punishing me for sinning in their society. And the noises, I hear a noise form outside. A tapping at the door, a clouded window with fireflies that form a man. It would seem I’m being haunted, or maybe my mind is playing tricks on me. That tapping at the door just doesn’t feel natural though. It feels like a knife chipping away at the wood, like the knife Hailey used to kill that man.

No I’m overthinking, I’m just stressing out…but what if I’m not. I can’t sleep like this, I can’t live like this. The guilt of that misty afternoon won’t ever leave my mind. I’m haunted by it, reminded of it. Oh how I hate the human brain sometimes. Quit reminding me of those horrors I swear to it, but they never stop. The forest is cruel with its punishment, a psychological torture no government agency could think of. I’d rather suffer the same fate of the victim than become a subject of mind games. My peaceful life in the woods, was it all over? I had tried so hard for so long to live my best life, distancing myself from humanity, becoming one with the Earth. Yet now I find myself punished by what I had held dear for so long. The forest does not tolerate sin or betrayal, and no organism is absent from this law. To those that dream of living away from humans, I offer you words of wisdom and experience, to respect the values of the new world you desire, for nothing is above the laws of the natural society we have failed to understand.