Suffering in the mist of Sympathy

My Dad was my superhero. Wanna know why? Let me tell you.

He would take me on shopping sprees, and take me for ice cream every day and he is SUPER RICH. But one day, everything changed. Mom and Dad got into an intense fight and it was all because of me. "OMG! You're spending all our money on HER. We're gonna run into debt because of her!" mom shrieks. "What do you know? You're the one pretending to be poor on the streets and stealing from others. Before you know it, the police might catch you and I won't back you up." Dad folds his arms. "OH SHUT UP. I see you smoking on the streets every now and then. At least I'm less guilty!" "Is smoking a crime? Seriously! Just get a life. I'm leaving!" next thing you know, Dad's packed up his bags and didn't even say goodbye to me. I was steaming. And now...life just won't be the same.

Mom and I snuck out every day at 12:04 am to beg on the streets. I had to wear sunglasses and ripped clothes in the middle of winter. "Mom! When will we buy the Gucci bag that Dad promised he'd buy me?" "Honey, we're poor. Remember?" I had enough. "NO, WE ARE NOT POOR! STOP SAYING THAT! We have a mansion, expensive clothes and good food. Just stop being a FRUAD!" I stormed off.

I had to get homeschooled after that day. But I'd always make excuses so I wouldn't have to talk to mom. "I broke my ankle and I can't think properly." I'd say. "My eyes are sore so my hand doesn't function well." I'd complain. But mom would always drag me to my desk and teach me. I'd fake sleep every time and snort as loud as a pig. "OK, go to your room! I'm DONE." mom would yell. I'd run away and sob. I knew that dad would never come back but I kept on praying.

I heard sirens blaring at 8:30 am. I looked outside my building to see mom handcuffed and walking into a black police car. Dad knew this would happen. I knew this would happen. And my mom? She was a hypocrite to keep on doing this. My Dad says that what you do for 30 days becomes a habit. But this lady? She's done this for 14 years. I understand why Dad left. Mom is KA-RA-ZEE. I didn't want a single living soul to know that I'm related to that thief. So I jumped out my window and ran away FOR GOOD.

I stayed in a homeless shelter for a while and then started my own restaurant with the help of some old friends. "OMG! Your mom is a psycho! She needs major therapy!" one of my friends says. I look down at my shoelaces. I didn't want to talk about my mom OR dad anymore. They both betrayed me. It's like my parents don't even know me! "Are you OK? We're sorry for mentioning your mom again. Want to come to my house to have some tea and watch the news?" I nodded.

I and my BFF walked to her house silently. When we arrived, we settled down and she made some herbal green tea for me. "They say that green tea makes you calm and makes you think better. Maybe you should take this every day. It'll really help." she passed the hot mug to me and I sipped it slowly. I turned on the news and to my surprise, my Dad was the first person to show up. "Darren Matthews dies from lung cancer on April 1st, 2023." my eyes fill up with tears. How could my parents be so reckless? My BFF hugged me tight. "It'll be OK. Just drink more of your herbal tea. You'll feel better. Your parents made big mistakes and they just end up where they end up. Heaven or Hell. Now, drink."

The next day was the same. I drink green tea while seeing one of my parents on the TV. I couldn't take it anymore. I threw the remote at the TV. "I HATE my parents. I HATE my life! I want to go. NOW. Please." I cried. My heart hurt. My friend looked at me concerned. "If the tea doesn't help you, we might as well take you to therapy." I looked at her. Maybe she was right. I needed to talk to someone about this. Someone I could trust.

I talked to my therapist Susie about my issue. "Dana, we can't change people. And we don't have to pray for someone to change. It's their decision. Your mom decided to steal, and guess where she ended up." "In jail," I respond. "See? And your dad smoked as well. He knew he could get lung cancer. He knew his skin would start to age. He knew that HE could stop smoking. But he decided not to. The world is changing. Not by itself, but by the people living on it. If we keep on making dumb mistakes and committing suicide...Dana. We aren't in charge of changing people. Even policemen aren't in charge of changing people. Even I am not in charge of changing people. They have to change themselves. So let your father be. Let your mother be. Only God knows where they'll end up." her words were so inspirational. And true. I thought my dad was a superhero. But he was just wasting his life.

When I came back home, my BFF ran into my arms. "So how did it go?" "Amazing. I feel like a new person!" "Glad to hear that." I fell onto the soft couch and she made tea once more. "Wanna watch the news?" she asks. "Nope! We don't need to feed off of that garbage! I want to watch a message from the church that you go to." she was shocked. "Wow, new Dana! Let me turn it on!"

You see, this is what I learned. Sometimes, people don't change. And you don't have to force them to. All you have to do is not worry and be happy!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d-diB65scQU