A river journey

Submitted into Contest #98 in response to: Set your story on (or in) a winding river.... view prompt

5 comments

Sad Fiction Inspirational

A storm was brewing in the dark night, and the treacherous path of the Ulk River rocks the tiny boat ridden by a couple racing for the nearest village doctor.

Only the small burning oil lantern gave minimum light to their path, and everything else was a hindrance.

The wind blows from the directions they want to take, and the currents drive them back to where they came from.

But even in the harshes weather, the strong man paddles with all his might, going against the current. Having a pregnant wife about to give birth was the only thing in his mind, keeping him from pushing through the unforgiving climate.

Her every heavy breathing kills the pain of his sore arms from paddling, and her cries make his rowing faster. He kept talking to her, trying to ease his wife's pain in his own way.

They could have taken the land route but he couldn't afford to make her pregnant wife venture the dark woods for wolves were more active at night, and walking would take hours before they could even reach the doctor's place. 

Only through his trusted boat, and the usual river would suffice yet the turn of events caused them trouble. Leaving him with the only choice of continuing the path he had taken with all his might.

The storm continued to get stronger, the sizzle became a massive rain shower, hitting their skin like tiny thousand needles and lightning from above kept appearing as if the god of thunder had been enraged.

It was ad if fate was preventing his children to be born.

Fear soon came into the lady's eyes and worries to the man's heart as the only lamp they rely on blew out from the intense wind. The lady's cry became even more turbulent, causing the man to sing with his deep voice to calm her down. A song made from the melody of the angered nature, and the beat from the thunders of the sky.

Lightning came nonstop, appearing closer than they've used to. One hits a tree, turning its leaves on fire and another hits a passing wolf.

Frightening, it might seem but turned into a blessing in disguise as it gives light to the path for a short duration of time in intervals.

Yet the blessing came to an end, and it blocked the sight of an incoming barrel that threw the couple off-board and their boat upside down.

Both the wife and their boat were getting drifted down the river, and only his grip keeps them both from being swift further.

The swift currents were getting stronger but his strength was diminishing but none of it matters to him for his heart was filled with worries of his endangered family.

With the rest of his strength, he overturned his turned boat and put her wife back. His paddles were already dragged by the river's current that the only thing he could do was drag the boat with a rope tied in his body as he swims in the dark water.

His every stroke tires his body, sharp stones rolling along the currents cut every visible skin he had, and water kept entering his mouth, resulting in him stopping for a millisecond before making another dive.

Alas, the light of the torches was in sight and the village was already a couple of strokes away but another misfortune came as the rope that binds him to the boat snaps.

He was able to get them back but it only made them farther from where the village was. He had already used up all his strength, and there was no more left in him. Until a cry was heard from the very boat he was holding. A cry of an infant child along with the thunders of the sky.

With another burst, he swam once more into the river while the dragging snapped rope of the boat with his hands. He dives, swims, and strokes as if there was no tomorrow, trying to ensure his family's safety.

Even if his hands stings in pain and became all red from the pressure of the rope, he care less and continued.

Meanwhile, on the village port, villagers came to notice a man swimming against the river's current. They were all laughing at how silly the man was, neglecting the purpose of a boat and trying to go against nature until they saw the woman gravely crying in pain.

All men helped to take the two onshore, while the women called the doctor. And in that malevolent storm, gave two news that changed the life of the man. The death of his wife and the birth of his twins.

He named the first girl Thundara, the brave girl who cries along with the thunder of the sky, and the second one, Aria, a girl that would be as forceful yet untouchable as the blowing storm wind.

But even in the birth of his two angels, his sorrow was still too deep from his passing wife. She was his only beloved, from childhood until the moment she dies.

He held her close into his arm while his tears fall into her wife's face as his children cry along with him. The sorrow of the family brought melancholy towards men and gods that the ravaging storm started to calm and the showers of rain faded.

After many years, the man grew old. His brown hair became greyish white, his bulk muscle became thinner but the scars left wounds and cuts he received that day still embedded in his body. And his children became what he had envisioned of them.

But he couldn't keep his tears from flowing whenever he visits her wife's grave.

All those times, she was his one and only, and for him to love only one woman made him adored by all.

For a man to cry doesn't make him lesser of a man, but to keep on pushing from unending strife with an unwavering will for your loved ones, makes one worthy to be called strong. 

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Hello, I'm Yaj. I just wanna say advance happy fathers day to all daddies there. I dedicated this stories for you all.

June 18, 2021 01:22

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5 comments

Mohamed Sarfan
04:29 Jun 18, 2021

Dear Writer, I can feel a storyline as cold in my mind as rivers. The actions of the husband who struggles to rescue his wife who was caught in a storm prove grandchildren. The boat of this story also keeps me swimming as a reader through the philosophy that not every day in life is like thinking. A boyfriend who fights hard to save his pregnant wife's life loses before the rules. She fights with the Lord because the memories alone are not enough to stay with her boyfriend through the ages and she too is left with the gift of having two ch...

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Yaj Imagination
23:54 Jun 23, 2021

Thank you for your comment and feedback! I'm really glad you liked the story. I was reading the theme then I remembered the incoming holiday so I was like, why not relate it to it? Then bam! I connected some pieces for the plot. Although, the story didn't go as expected as my vocabulary had its limits. But I'm still satisfied of the outcome of my work.

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21:00 Jun 23, 2021

This was so sad and so uplifting all at once. You conveyed the emotions effortlessly, and the story seemed to soar on them. A critique: The story switches tense several times, which is slightly off-putting. These tense shifts do seem to go with the theme of the story, though: two currents, one of water and one of air, pushing against each other. I see huge potential in this work and its author. Thank you for the story! :)

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Yaj Imagination
23:49 Jun 23, 2021

Thank you for the feedback as well. I'm really glad people like my works. To be honest, I had it difficult to connect all the emotion dwelling on the two, and just start a new paragraph to change the tension. And I think I used too much rise and fall of emotion, which was supposed to be and should be a slow rising tension. Neither the less, thank you once again for the feedback.

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01:04 Jun 24, 2021

You're welcome! It was a pleasure to read! :)

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