Horror Fiction Mystery

Most demonic possessions usually occur with bad people and secretly unexpectedly. The agenda of demonic forces are to torture, oppress, and block the holy purpose from all human beings. This time however, and which has never happened before from anything or to anyone in the history of man, a possession transpired to a normal male and from a non demonic force.

His life was fine and normal, so he thought, until the man turned 40. The man, who grew up in a Christian family, was saved at one time but now has lost his way. He was short and fairly handsome looking, blonde hair and with a rather nasty temper. Not the smartest guy in the world but smarter than most. Keith was also retired from the military which made him a military veteran with a good pension income. Therefore, the man did ok in life up until his forties and never had any problems from demonic forces before.

One night the man, whom his mother, father and siblings called him Keith, decided to go to bed early. One month before this night Keith turned forty, and just his younger sister came to visit him on his birthday. Everything was fine; Keith turned off his TV, flipped the front room and bedroom lights off, and then crawled into bed. Keith slept like he always has done, fast and dead to the world.

The next morning Keith woke up feeling a little strange, with a small scratch on his right arm. Keith rubbed the scratch on his arm, but thought nothing of it and went to the bathroom to do his morning routines. When Keith finished brushing his teeth he headed towards the front room, sat down on the couch and contemplated on what to fix for breakfast. Keith turned on the TV to see what was on, but got distracted by a voice inside his head. This voice inside his head seemed unattached to his own thinking and uncontrolled.

The voice was not talking to him directly but about events that had occurred in his life as well about events with God and people that have been in his life before. The voice seemed passive and unaware that it was even talking inside Keith’s head. This went on for another two days while Keith just laid on his bed and listened to the voices. At first Keith thought he was going crazy, like most people would, but then he started to test the voices. Keith began talking to the voices.

 Keith realized that by talking to these voices that he would defiantly be crazy because you never talk back to the voices in your head. Nevertheless, how else was he going to test if the voices were real or not, he thought to himself. Therefore, Keith did just that, he started to talk to his voices in his head.

At first Keith asked the simple questions, who, what, why, and how are you doing this to me. The voices did not answer Keith back, but continued on and laughed at him. Keith then replied to the statements that the voices were making, again no response back but they did seem to pause every time Keith said something. Eventually the voices got more active and verbal aggressive towards Keith. The voices and Keith’s head started to play mind games with him.

“Over here.” The voices were telling him maliciously.

Keith would reply annoyed, “Where, over where?”

Keith’s voices continued on with a snicker, “over here, down the road in a white house.”

That white house the voices referred to defiantly existed and Keith had driven by it several times since he moved in into his one bedroom apartment, one year prior to the sudden voices transpiring in his head.

“Over here, at Craig’s apartment, that is where we are at. Hurry, your daughter is being abused.” Said the voices again, in a hasteful tone.

Keith drove over to Craig’s apartment and noticed no one was home. Keith was getting suspicious of the voices in his head, but could not figure out why they knew about the places and the location of them.

“Stop messing with me!” Keith yelled at the voices. “I mean it, I’m warning you.”

Ignoring Keith’s request and warnings, his voices relentlessly pushed on even stronger than before. The voices would not stop talking or playing mind games with him. The voices continuously repeated the same phrase with different places each time.

“Over here, over here, at Molly’s house. She is being abused too."

Keith had enough, he was tired of going to each place to find out nothing was actually going on. Going to Molly’s house was the final place Keith was going to fall for, from his voices in his head. Molly was his ex wife from 10 years ago and they had a daughter together, so Keith was quite concerned. Plus, Molly remarried and was not happy to see Keith in a paranoid state that his was in, driving up to her place unannounced.

“Go home Keith, get some help. You cannot come up here like this after all these years.” Molly told Keith caringly.

That settled it then, Keith concluded that the voices in his head were not real and the reason they knew of the people and places that he knew of, was because he knew these people and places. Ignoring the voices Keith finally went back to his apartment and decided to see a psychiatrist the next day about the unsettling craziness occurring inside his head. The doctor from the military hospital told Keith that he must have some kind of depression psychosis since he has never been diagnosed with any mental disorders before.

With a prescription of pills prescribed to him, and a reassurance that it might just be a depression disorder he could possible over come, Keith drove back home to try and live his normal life again. The pills Keith was taking did not work and was not drowning out the voices right away. Keith thought maybe the pills needed some time to kick in. So Keith laid on the couch with the TV on, and tried to block out the voices that continued on in his head.

A week went by but the voices were still there with Keith. None of the pills Keith was taking were working and he was humoring them but also still testing the voices secretly. Keith was not convinced yet if it was just in his mind or something demonic oppression him. One day Keith caught the voices in a characteristic that only another being would have other than his own. It also startled Keith because the characteristic of the voices seemed more human.

“I told you, me and my wife had a fallen out and can never get back together again. Leave me alone you dirty bastards.” Claimed Keith harshly towards the voices, when they were saying Molly was with another guy besides her husband and wanted Keith to be ok with it.

“If Molly is with another guy but wants to be with me then it is not only her new husband she is cheating on she would also be cheating on me. Besides if she wants to be with me she knows how to find me, but again if she is cheating I do not want to be with that skank.” Continued on Keith aggravated.

At that moment Keith had some tears rolling down his face despite the anger he had. Keith thought why am I crying, I am mad, this does not make sense. All of a sudden it felt like something left his body and the voices abruptly stopped. It was quiet for about two minutes before the voices continued on again. The voices started to play mind games with Keith even more so than before.

“Hey, if this is someone messing with me I am serious, leave me alone!” Shouted Keith at the voices.

This time the voices answered back with a nasty reply, “No, you leave us alone you mean smart-ass. Are you stupid or you just some kind of pussy?”

Keith was startled by the sudden reply but nevertheless got angry back with a somewhat nasty reply of his own. “That is it, if you are demons I am going to cast you out somehow, but if you are humans I will see that you pay most horribly for this.”

With an uncontrollable movement of his arm Keith started to hit himself in the face very hard. Keith felt the anger inside him from these voices and he did not like it which in turn made him also angry.

“Is that all you got, come on give me more you assholes!”

Needless to say the voices that now had a hold of Keith’s body did just that, it used Keith to hit himself even harder with a mean proclamation. “You are nothing, you deserve this retribution. You think we are being bad to you, we are trying to help you.”

“Help me, this is what you call help? This is hypocritical behavior, you cannot just twist the truth like that.” Said Keith with a bruised cheek and blood now rolling down his face from where the voices got him to hit himself multiple times.

“You think you are so smart.” The voices said to Keith with no remorse for their actions.

Again Keith asked the voices that he was now convinced were some beings possession him, “Who or what are you possession me like this? A depression psychosis cannot be where I hit myself as well. This is some bad magic stuff.”

“We know you deducted who we are Keith, but you will never proof it or get out of it. Take your medicine.”

Keith realized this possession was never going to stop until the day he died or the voices got what they wanted. Another year went by and the same routine went on, the voices would mind twist Keith, then use him to hit himself. Keith was going to try and get an exorcist or learn some black magic somewhere if he could to try and stop the possession, but the possession took a hold of him to where he was no longer himself.

With Keith now controlled by something possession him and nothing he could do to stop it he gave up. No, he was no longer a Christian at the time of the possession so the possession could have been from anything, nevertheless, the possession got worse until it started on other people.

With one last statement Keith told the possessors that one day he will have his revenge and that all those other people they have hurt will to. Keith told the voices, “Truth will set me free from this oppression and then what? You have played mind games with me and twisted every truth known to man. For what? Some kind of punishment you think I deserve, hypocrites.”

“We will see if you can get us one day, if we don’t have you for eternity. You will know who we are though.” Stated the voices.” Then again maybe you will thank us.”

Keith will get them back one day and the voices are right about him thanking them, but it will because he will know who they are and why they did this to him. The truth will show him they were the bad ones and that they never understood the difference between punishment and justice. Keith finds out that he will be the one to judge on that final day.

Keith does not realize that God had choose him to judge and made him go through all this to get a better understanding of right and wrong. God needed someone with a just mind, not a loving and caring mind towards the beings that he created. The one possession Keith the whole time was God.

July 23, 2021 16:34

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Jane Andrews
12:09 Aug 02, 2021

Hi Brian. I was also given your story to critique. Like Peter, I think you've got an interesting idea here but it needs a little redrafting so that it flows properly and sustains your readers' interest. I noticed from your bio that you wee in the military yourself until you were honourably discharged - might you be able to use some of your military experience to add depth to the story? E.g. You could have a flashback (or several) to scenes from Keith's army life, showing the readers what he went through and building our sympathy for Keith...


Brian Rains
05:15 Aug 21, 2021

Thank you for the feedback. I should have went more into detail instead of hastily writing this short story.


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09:09 Jul 30, 2021

Hi Brian. I've been given your story to critique. I really liked the idea behind this story, demonic possession is something that sends shivers up my spine and always has! I think your overall story is good, but it could be told better. You could work on showing, not telling. Show us Keith is ex-military, don't tell us. Maybe framed medals keep falling from the wall or something like that. The writer and reader are both active in the telling of a story. Overall the story is a great one! All the best Peter.


Brian Rains
05:18 Aug 21, 2021

Thank you for commenting on my story. I like the idea of the story myself. In the future I will work on my interaction with what I am writing and bring it more to life.


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