Submitted to: Contest #128

The Tea Of Love With Extra Ginger

Written in response to: "Start your story with someone making a cup of tea — either for themself or for someone else."

Fiction Mystery Romance

When the aroma of tea escapes her five by eight kitchen to probably reach her neighbours, Savi knows that the tea leaves are dissolving in the air as much as in the milk. She digs out a large piece of ginger from the fruit basket, and cardamom seeds and cloves from the shelf, to beat them to death in her Imam dasta. The whipped layer of cream engulfs the crushed spices like the evil sea takes humans in. Setting the gas stove to sim flame, Savi lets the tea take its time.

After a rough span of ten minutes, when the tea has boiled to half of its quantity, she filters it in two medium-sized cups. She sips slightly from her cup to taste it, and when the marinated beverage relieves her cold-caught throat, she thinks she is good to go. Placing them on a wooden tray, she heads to the hall, where her better half is waiting to melt his stiffed body a bit with the morning tea.

“Ta-da! Here is your tea, sir,” Savi sings, passing one cup to her husband. “With extra ginger, as you like it.”

“Thank you, sweetheart,” Saurabh compliments her gesture with an affectionate smile.

“You know what, you and your tea are the only saviours in this deadly December,” Saurabh winks. He takes his first sip and closes his eyes, to taste it to the full. Savi shakes her head, shyly at his naughty comment. A few jiffies fly, and when she sees her husband twisting in a comfier position on the couch, her psyche decides to snatch his comfort.

“I hope you remember what date is today,” She asks in a ‘high school viva external’ tone.

Saurabh brings his frozen body in attentiveness and gulps down his saliva. You’re a criminal if you don’t remember the dates after the marriage and guess what, this can lead your wife to be a more heinous criminal!

“Ummm…of course, I do. Todayyy…ummm..today is..” stutters a now conscious Saurabh. Looking at the fright on his face, Savi bursts into peals of laughter.

“What’s funny?” Saurabh asks knowingly that he only is the matter of joke at the moment. He scratches his head in confusion.

“I know you don’t remember,” Savi continues to laugh at his misery.

“Anyway, today we had tea together for the first time,” she makes him recall. “Remember? College canteen?”

His pupils roll, trying to recall and just when the incident strikes his memory, his head nods in dismay.

“Oh, God! Fuck, yeah! How can I forget???” His voice thickens, even more, when he exclaims. “Also, if memory serves me right, that was the first time I had tea in my life, right?”

Their eyes dive into each other, collecting the pearls of memories beneath the sea of their timeless love. 

“Yes…You were a caffeine addict, and I proved to you how overrated the coffee is,” Savi nods, smiling from ear to ear.

“Where is the lie!” smiles Saurabh. “And I never got back to coffee till date.”

They both sip in silence, looking at each other. Their love story seems like a clear win, and they don’t need to hold each other’s hands to announce to the world that they are hands in hands.

“But I think you wish to,” Savi breaks the ice again. Saurabh coughs, about to spit the tea back into the cup.

“Sorry? I didn’t get you, baby. What do you mean?” He frowns, lines of confusion visible on his forehead.

“You wish to taste coffee again, don’t you?” Savi questions with the stern in her otherwise soft voice.

“But…Why would you ask that?” Saurabh finds it strange enough to ponder over.

“Tell no!” Savi asks with a poker face.

“I don’t know. Maybe yes,” Saurabh tries to answer. He gives his next words some thought. “Ummmm….but only if you make it for me.”

“Oh really?” Savi shows up with a sly smile. “Okay then. One day, I will make it for you, for sure. But, for now, you have to tolerate this old school tea.”

“Who the hell said I am tolerating it?” Saurabh says, sipping from his cup, followed by a half-smile. “I am fucking enjoying it.”

Savi stares at him for a few seconds as if capturing him. Then, her eyes roll down his body from head to toe. Her heartbeats catch a ferocious pace, and she squeezes her breasts to calm her anxiety.

“You have no idea how much I love you,” Savi raises from her chair, nears the couch, and her shivering fingers caress her beloved husband’s face. Her eyes fill up to the brim with salty water. She is nearly sobbing.

“What happened, darling?” Saurabh asks, having no clue what made her so temperamental, all of a sudden. “Why….a..re….yo..u..cry..inggggg?”

“I’ll miss you, Saurabh. I’ll miss you terribly,” she continues to rain out of her eyes and surrenders her head on his shoulder.

“But….wh…e…r…e….am…..I…” 

Saurabh’s cell phone brings her back to her senses as its loud ringtone echoes in the hall. Unwillingly, she frees herself from the warmth of her beloved’s embrace. She wipes her tears off with her dupatta and reaches for the phone. The name flashing on the screen is familiar to her, and she bites her lower lip before she takes the call.

“Hey, sweetheart! Remember the coffee date in the evening?” asks the enthusiastic voice on the other side.

Savi chooses to be quiet, and when she is about to cut the call, the sharp voice asks again. “Don’t tell me, you forgot, for the sake of Jesus Christ!”

“Sorry to say, but he cannot have coffee anymore,” replies Savi in a firm tone and disconnects the call.

She reaches the balcony. Gripping tightly on the railings, she inhales the misty wind. Standing right there, she eyes on the city that is covered with dense fog, just like a layer of foam on a mug of coffee. She turns, and resting her back on the railing, looks at the wall poster in the hall to read aloud the quotation on it : 

“One should always be loyal to tea because the caffeine in coffee is dangerous to health.”

A stream of uncontrollable tears escapes her eyes just like that of white foam from her dead husband’s mouth, who is lying on the couch, wide-eyed.

Posted Jan 09, 2022
Share:

You must sign up or log in to submit a comment.

30 likes 14 comments

Betsy Ellis
17:19 Mar 03, 2022

Oh, a plot twist. Did not see that coming! Probably because I am over here busy thinking about what an Imam Dasta is and imagining the smell of crushed cardamom. All of he sudden, he is dead.

I did not submit a story to the contest last week, so I try to pick one story each day to read and comment on, critique, and provide some editing on. I am looking for peer editors for myself and am potentially trying to turn it to a source of income. It is hard to edit on this platform but I do my best.

I do provide editing type comments, not with the purpose to nitpick but in case you reuse your story elsewhere. I have republished a story I wrote here elsewhere and made corrections. I have a repeated word in one of my articles on reedsy and a verb tense disagreement but was able to fix them before publishing elsewhere.

I hope this is helpful to you.

1st para - “When the aroma of tea escapes her five by eight kitchen to probably reach her neighbours, Savi knows that the tea leaves are dissolving in the air as much as in the milk.”

I like the sensory description. This sentence is a bit confusing though because it implies that Savi knows her neighbors are smelling the tea but it say probably, so I guess she doesn't know. I think it would read better I a way that takes out the confusion of what she knows and doesn't know. My thoughts:

“With the aroma of tea escaping her five by eight kitchen to reach her neighbors, Savi knows”

I think this preserves your meaning, and prevents the readers from getting all caught up in what she knows and doesn't and how she knows, etc.

I really like the analogy “like the evil sea takes humans in.” but I think you might be better off without the word “in”.

“sim flame” is an unfamiliar term to me. I assume you mean low-heat or simmer, but just letting you know it might be unfamiliar to some of your readers.

5th Para
“A few jiffies fly,” again this is an unfamiliar phrase to me. Where I am from we say “in a jiffy” which means quickly, so I assume this is another way of saying a few seconds.

6th para - ‘high school viva external’ I simply do not understand this reference.

7th para - “Saurabh brings his frozen body in attentiveness and gulps down his saliva. You’re a criminal if you don’t remember the dates after the marriage and guess what, this can lead your wife to be a more heinous criminal!”

I think that “to attentiveness” would read more clearly than “in attentiveness”. Also “after marriage” flows better than “after the marriage” in this case.

2oth para - “Savi questions with the stern in her otherwise soft voice” may read more smoothly as “Savi questions with a stern tone in...”

26th para - “she squeezes her breasts to calm her anxiety.” when I first read this sentence I was confused. Do you mean she tensed her chest muscles? Or she grabbed her own breast with her hands? I imagined the latter and thought it strange. Just wanted to let you know that this just seems like a weird thing to do but maybe I was just misunderstand or there is some cultural reference that I do not understand.

Well that is about all the time I have to spend on details today. Again, it was a good story. It engaged my senses, it had interesting and believable characters. You set a scene, developed a backstory, built up to the conflict, and then finally a catastophic plot twist.

I enjoyed it. I hope it is just fiction. (I have actually had someone pour cleaners over my food when I did not have enough food to eat, so it is a very real and scary thought to me. I knew the muffin was wet and shouldn't be but I was so hungry that I ate it anyway.)

I would appreciate any feedback you can give on my work too.
https://blog.reedsy.com/creative-writing-prompts/author/betsy-ells/

Reply

Harsh Sharma
02:39 Mar 04, 2022

Hey. Thanks for letting me aware of the plenty of mistakes I have done in this one. Surely, I will keep them in mind. And I'm glad you loved the twist.

Reply

Kev Neylon
21:12 Jan 21, 2022

Very entertaining, and the twist is great. I was a bit less subtle with the poisoning.

Reply

Harsh Sharma
10:29 Jan 25, 2022

Thank you so much ☺️

Reply

Charlie Murphy
21:31 Jan 16, 2022

Well! i was not expecting it to end that way! Great job!

Reply

Harsh Sharma
07:14 Jan 18, 2022

I'm glad to know that. Thank you so much!

Reply

Kirti Makhija
21:32 Jan 15, 2022

gosshhhhh...this was so so freaking amazing....❤️I almost had my heart in mouth at the end

Reply

Harsh Sharma
16:44 Jan 16, 2022

Thank you so much. I'm glad you enjoyed it.❤️

Reply

Rs Chauhan
19:47 Jan 15, 2022

Loyal to tea❤️

Reply

Harsh Sharma
16:45 Jan 16, 2022

Yes, because coffee is unhealthy.🌝❤️

Reply

Ritika Sharma
16:18 Jan 15, 2022

💛👏👏👏👏👏

Reply

Harsh Sharma
16:45 Jan 16, 2022

☺️❤️❤️

Reply

Parul Sharma
15:44 Jan 15, 2022

Amazing 👏

Reply

Harsh Sharma
16:45 Jan 16, 2022

Thank youuuu ❤️🤍

Reply

RBE | Illustrated Short Stories | 2024-06

Bring your short stories to life

Fuse character, story, and conflict with tools in Reedsy Studio. All for free.