After leaving work, Marty decided to take a drive. Feeling bored with his usual routine, he wanted something different. Deciding to take the scenic route, he turned opposite of the street he usually drove. After a few blocks he began closely examining his surroundings and was impressed by some of the businesses he wasn’t previously aware of. Trying to take it all in, he was shocked to see a park that was unfamiliar to him. Not sure if it was from lack of attention or he had ventured somewhere new. Smiling at the sight of the garden surrounding the park, he almost forgot he was driving. Noticing that he got too close to the park made him aware that he had drifted off the road and nearly drove through the shrubbery.
Nervousness taking over as he realized that he had crossed five lanes of traffic, he guided the vehicle back across the yellow line instantly regretting allowing himself to be distracted. He was usually pretty attentive. Breathing heavily, he noticed there were no other vehicles around. Once he noticed everything was unfamiliar, he wondered how he had gotten so far off course and was unsure if he could find his way back home. He had only ever taken one course to work and one course to the grocery store. Now wondering why. The thought of trying new changes tended to make him nervous. He doesn’t know why he was that way, but he was.
Any time his place of employment decided to make changes, it gave him anxiety. Even small ones like the color of the push pins on the bulletin board. He always noticed immediately. For days afterward all he could do was stare at the subtlety. Never understanding how someone could just change without alerting anyone. Big changes gave him a panic attack. When his office had a remodel, he had to ask for a week off. The remodel began on a day of work and because the carpet was being replaced, the employees had to all cram into a corner of the building that made them feel like sardines.
Watching the workers rip the carpet up, made him nauseous. He remembered having to leave for the bathroom so as not to vomit in front of everyone. When he returned to his desk his boss was waiting for him.
“You alright, man?”
“I think I have a stomach bug.”
“Why don’t you go home? There’s not much room in here anyhow.”
“Thanks. I’ll make it up.”
“It’s fine. Don’t worry about it. Take care of yourself.”
Feeling himself about to upchuck again he pushed past his boss, barely making out of the office vomiting in the hall. Rushing away embarrassed, he ran straight to his car and sped home.
Not sure where he even was he reached for his cell that he placed in the cupholder next to his seat. It was the usual spot. Never changing it because he craved routine.
When his hand grazed the empty cup holder, a slight panic began to overtake him. His heart began to race as he repeatedly searched the cup holder blindly with his hand. Producing no results, he signaled to pull off the highway even though there were no other vehicles. Quickly unbuckling, he frantically began searching, not able to find his phone he climbed out of the car, to better search. He searched the floorboard. Even checking under the seat, he began to lose his composure enough to lose rational thought causing him to feel inside the cracks of his seat and other parts of the car that were too small to hide a phone. Dropping his head to rest on the seat, his breathing quickened more.
“Stay calm,” he said aloud to himself.
Exhaling audibly, he closed his eyes and stood up straight. After a few moments of deep breaths he continued his search a little more rational. Looking around to try and figure out where he was, he got excited when he saw a gas station in the distance. Not phased at all by the bleakness of the location he was more concerned about the abnormal experience he was having.
While he was distracted with his racing heart he reached into his pocket for his wallet. There he saved a number of a friend that if things got too overwhelming for him, he could call. Touching the pocket where he carried his wallet, more panic set in once his brain registered that it was empty. Checking the other pockets on his khakis to make sure he didn’t move it, desperation took over once he realized he didn’t have it. Sliding down the side of the car, he began to cry, but remembered that he was near a place of business and would be able to figure out his way home.
Happy to finally know where he was, he got back in the car and went to the gas station to search for someone to assist him. He stopped the first person he found.
“Excuse me.”
The man looked uncomfortable and stared at Marty.
“Can you tell me where I am?”
The man shook his head causing Marty to stagger. Overwhelmed, he leaned on the nearest object trying to maintain eye contact with the patron.
“If I give you my phone number, will you call my phone for me?”
The patron continued to look blankly, but retrieved his phone anyway. His thumb hovered over the keypad waiting for Marty to speak. Marty recited his phone number and the stranger pressed the send button. Rushing out to the car with his adrenaline pumping, he got excited to hear his phone ringing.
Rushing to search his car once more he became twice as confused as before when he couldn’t find the phone. Double checking the passenger side of the car, he could hear the ringing, but couldn’t locate the direction. Scratching his head, he closed his eyes to tune in to where the sound was coming from. After a few seconds, he realized the phone was in his back pocket. Confused and embarrassed he signaled to the guy that he found it and tried to remember why he put it there or when. Holding the phone, he looked at it as if it were magic.
Suddenly aware that he needed to go home, he got back into his car and drove home the exact route that he knew so well. Driving into the same parking spot he had for the previous four years, walked in the same direction he always did to the elevator. Aware of where he put his car key to make sure it was in the same location as usual, he breathed a sigh of relief that everything was back to normal.
After arriving at his front door, he checked to make sure the hallway appeared the same. Sighing before opening the door to his apartment, he slowly put the key in the hole and slowly entered. Not surprised by anything, he continued on his normal routine.
Smiling as he collapsed on the couch, he looked around to make sure nothing was out of the ordinary. Relaxing for the night, he felt safe. Waking with a start drenched in sweat, Marty relaxed once he realized that it was a nightmare. Looking at his clock to check the time, he noticed that it was only thirteen minutes until his alarm rang, breaking his routine. Deciding to go ahead and get started with the day, he threw the covers off. He left the bed bumping the nightstand sending everything sailing. Riddled with panic, he clumsily found his phone and called in sick from work. With his routine already disturbed by the early wake up call, he knew it would be a bad idea trying to get through the day without any more mistakes. Shaking from the stress, he debated whether or not he wanted to replace the things he had knocked off. Feeling like he was about to have a mental breakdown he curled into a fetal position and cried.
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