Sunset love

Watching the sunset has always been romantic, as I sat with my soon to be husband on the yellow picnic blanket with the white checker pattern here was a big sigh in his chest, 

“what’s wrong my love” he looks at me with his big puppy dog eyes 

“the sunset is so beautiful but do you know what is the most beautiful thing?” I’m guessing he will say to me 

“it's you love” just as the sun finished setting and the starry sky was coming he kissed me with his soft lips. 

The screaming howls of Charlie wakes me for the fourth time tonight. I look over and see the empty bed on the left side. I get up and slide on my slippers getting ready to help the baby, I pick Charlie up 

“hi baby how are you this morning love” he coos in response. After feeding him I look at the clock with the chipping paint 4:47am grabbing my phone off my bedside I try to call my Sam 

“Hey this is Sam leave a message and I'll call you back as soon as I can” looking over at the now sleeping baby hoping he’ll be home in the morning. 

“Mommyyyyy Charlie is slobbering all over my toyysss” I wake up to a house of chaos seeing Sam now in bed next me me I lean over to kiss him, but instead of smelling like the perfume I got him he smells of beer and cheap perfume.

 I pull myself out of the stiff bed and head to grab Charlie from her crib but instead I find her on the floor trying to eat the tv remote 

“Charlie, do we eat the tv remote?” She looks at me and laughs, smiling. I pick her up and bring her to the old wooden high chair. 

“Pepper please come down stairs for breakfast” as I’m turning on the cold stove. I see a little head full of blonde hair that needs to be brushed 

“mom my pjs have a hole in them” looking down I see a hole near Anna’s face from the movie frozen 

“Well if you keep sticking your finger through it then it's gonna get bigger” she gasps and runs to change her shirt. As I’m plating the eggs and grabbing the off brand Cheerios off the top of the fridge jack comes in the kitchen, 

“why didn't you wake me up I can't sleep in all day” 

“well I had to start breakfast and I have to get up when the kids get up because we can’t afford daycare anymore”

 “well maybe if you got a job we could”

 “you know I can't with the we have no one to watch the kids” 

“sounds like a you problem” suddenly I hear Charlie screaming as I rush over I curse him under my breath.

 “Guess who’s hereeee” as I see a head full of bright red hair enter the kitchen I know automatically who it is Pepper squealed with delight as she she’s the bags of gifts in her hands 

“Hey Pepper, how's my favorite niece doing?” 

“Auntie Jules come play with me!” 

“Aww sweet cheeks I would but I have to talk to your mom” she walks towards me and sticks her hands in the sink with me as I was washing dishes. 

“Hey how’s it going?” 

“Jules I told you to stop bring the girls gifts your gonna spoil them rotten” 

“and that’s my goal” she splashes me with the soapy water, I take a big pile of bubbles and stick them on her head 

“oh it's on now sister” as we splash the dish water and the soap bubbles at each other pepper joins in our fight. We laugh and laugh then I hear my name I look over and see Sam in the doorway 

“Julie” 

“Sam” the mood changes quickly as the air is heavy with negativity 

“hey pepper honey go take your sister upstairs and you guys get ready for the day”

“otay mommy” The two people I love just giving each other death looks. “Hey Jules what’s up why did you come over today?” 

“Oh! Yes I’m taking you and the girls swimming today because it’s the first day of summer and it's also hot outside” 

“oh that sounds fun but I haven’t gotten pepper a new swimsuit she grew out of the last one” 

“I thought so that’s why I bought the girls and you swim suits! Not only can we have a try on athon because I got a bunch just in case you didn’t like it over they didn’t fit” I smile as I watch her grab two plates and serve up breakfast for us. 

“Here sit tell me what’s up” she crunches intro the bacon that I probably overcooked as I hear Charlie and her cry’s 

“give me a second Jules I gotta grab the baby” 

“Sit down Kris Sam can get the baby” Sam who was still sitting the doorway gives a sneer at her and walks upstairs to take care of the baby. 

“So let's go swimming then get ice cream!” 

“Oh I don’t know Jules this is so sudden I don’t have anything ready for a beach day” “and that’s why you have a sister” 

“What do you mean by that?” 

“Everything is packed and ready in the car I got loads of stuff” 

“Jules, how did you pay for all that!!” Worried because we both have never had a lot of money before 

“lets just say I got a new job” as she grabs our now empty plates and washes them in the sink. As I’m helping pepper into her car seat I see Sam in the window with a beer 

“hey Jules, is it okay if the kids sleepover tonight?” 

“Sure I don’t mind watch them I’d love more time” 

“cool thanks” as I watch the day go by for the first day of summer went by to fast for my liking we end up at Jules for dinner, as I watch her cut the peanut butter sandwich into four squares she turns to me 

“hey do you want pasta instead I’m kinda craving pasta” 

“sure lemme get that started for you” I grab the pot from the low rise cabinet and fill it with the water. The red pot looks so new and shiny I forget what a new pot looks like. 

“Hey I’m gonna head out i'll be back in about two hours” 

“Kay get home safe” I stand and take our plates to the skin and rinse them off putting them in the small dish washer and head out of the house as I’m speeding down the highway on my way back to the apartment to confront which was once my true love I pass the spot we once met making a mental note two come back I get to our building. Opening the door I find him on the couch watching some football game “hey get up we need to talk” he mumbles go away so I turn off the tv 

“hey I was watching the game what gives?” 

“We need to talk Sam I’m tired of taking care of the kids all the time with no break” 

“I watch them though you just never see me do it” 

“get in the car I need to bring you somewhere” 

“I’m not getting in that car” 

“fine then I’m taking the tv” he looks at me irritated and starts to stand. As I watch him get his shoes on I wonder what happened to the man I love all I could see is a unkempt man that looks like he hasn’t showered in days 

“Are you ready?” 

“Yeah whatever” I take him back to the spot where it all started where we first fell in love. As I pull into the parking lot his face softens a bit 

“lets go sit on that bench” knowing that’s the same one we sat on years ago he walks over and hops on the top 

“remember how we carved are names in the sand” 

“yeah I remember that” the quiet breeze came by and we find ourselves in the same spot that came to be all the years ago our spot. 

“So why have you been so distant?” I ask in a soft but firm voice 

“because life got hard and I didnt want you to go through what I’m going through” as I lay next to him while watching the sun disappear under the clouds I thought to myself what is he hiding.

”What do you mean by that?” 

“You know how we wanted to have three kids” 

“yeah I still want a boy I have two beautiful girls” 

“Jules I’m going to tell you something but please don’t be mad” 

“okay I’m all ears” 

“I cant have anymore kids..” I look him in the face with the scruffy beard he has and the oversized shirt.

 “That’s it? That’s why you're being so distant” he looks at me with wide eyes “we can just have two kids I don’t mind I just miss you as the breeze comes by again I kiss him and smile at the new moon that showed up after the sun disappeared.