The cost of silence

Warning, this story contains depictions of sexual violence, mental health, and substance abuse. This story was inspired by the experiences of a friend.

They say every seven years, the cells in your body completely regenerate. Maya, our protagonist, sits in her apartment, screaming to the heavens and praying she can hold on for that long. The walls of her apartment close in around her, their suffocating silence leaving her with the nightmare she wishes she could forget. A week and a half ago, life had been full of promises, but now those dreams lay shattered in her boss's dimly lit office. She couldn’t recognize the girl who was looking back in the mirror. It was no longer her, just a shadow of her former self, the one who had been killed the second he laid his hands on her. At first, she couldn’t even tell if she was losing her mind, hallucinating everything, or if the things that had happened were real. 

Maya was 24, fresh out of college, her dreams stretching out ahead of her like an open highway. She had just started her new job at an important company. Soon, Maya hoped to climb the ladder of success and one day open her own business. Sadly, happiness didn’t last forever, and nothing came for free. That became clear to Maya during the first week on the job. 

Her boss called her to the office late one night. He claimed it was an emergency that needed to be handled as soon as possible. A chill ran down her spine, a warning of what was to come, but his words clouded her thoughts: "You don't show up now, you shouldn't show up again." The fear of failure had followed her since she was a child, like a dark shadow hanging over every one of her achievements. Driven by it once again, she got in the car, and 15 minutes later, arrived at the office. The moment she stepped inside, a cold dread curled in her stomach. The office, once buzzing with life from her colleagues, now sat empty and silent. 

As she approached his office—the Devil’s den—the chill she’d felt earlier turned into a full-blown storm in her veins. The moment she stepped inside, he pinned her to the wall, giving her no chance to escape. "You’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen," he whispered, his breath hot against her ear. "I knew the second you walked into that interview..." His hand slid from her shoulder down her arm, cold and possessive. "I just knew I had to have you, no matter what." 

Her heart hammered in her chest, each irregular beat like a countdown she couldn’t stop. His words crawled over her skin, cold and thick, and her breath caught in her throat, a silent scream she couldn’t let out. It wasn’t like anyone would hear her anyway. She froze as his fingers traced the outline of her jaw. Tears welled up, but she swallowed them down, knowing any sign of weakness would only feed his hunger. 

And the pattern repeated, each time a little worse than before. Her silence was deafening in his presence. She never uttered a word, no matter how hard he tried to convince her. Violence, abuse—she sat there and took it all. Forever silent, forever planning for the moment she could return the favor. 

Now, as she stood in her apartment after one more of their late-night meetings, a plan began to blossom. Maya didn’t just want him to suffer as she had; she wanted to ensure that no one else would endure what she did at the hands of that monster. 

That night, she went to sleep peacefully for the first time since it all began, knowing that tomorrow, judgment day would come. 

The next day, she woke up early and headed to the store to buy what she needed for that night, before going into the office and following the same routine she did every day. Once the workday ended and everyone left, she returned, just as he required. This time, the silence of the office filled her with confidence and a sense of calm as she walked in for the last time. When she entered, he was sitting at his desk, as overzealous and commanding as ever. He motioned for her to come over, and she did,this time not overcome with fear, knowing that, like Icarus, he had flown too close to the sun, and would soon be burned.  

She stood there, like an empty shell, as he took advantage of her. Her mind drifted somewhere far away, as it always did during these moments. This wasn’t her body he was abusing; it was just a vessel, a doll, something lifeless. When it was over, she gathered the torn clothes he had scattered on the floor, pulled herself together, and went to her car. But instead of going home to desperately scrub away every trace of him in the shower, she pulled out of the parking lot and hid in an alley. 

She followed him home from a safe distance and began the waiting game. Once she was sure that he and his neighbors were fast asleep, she got out the cans of gasoline she’d bought that morning and doused the entire bottom floor of his house. With a single match, she set the dump ablaze. As she watched the flames consume the house and the monster inside it, Maya thought of all the times she had sat in the shower, fully clothed, trying to pull together the pieces of herself he had broken. The moments she doubted herself, wondering if it was her fault, if she deserved it, now felt distant. The doubt and guilt were replaced by searing anger, hatred, and disgust. 

The memories of the abuse would haunt her for the rest of her life, but at least now she could sleep again, knowing that she had rid the world of one of its demons. Maybe in seven years, once every part of her body he had touched was gone, she’d be able to look in the mirror and recognize herself again. Maybe, after seven years, she would look at people without seeing them as threats. But until then, all she could do was learn to live with the nightmares. 

For weeks, the story of the "bright, young CEO brutally murdered in his home" was all over the news. Maya was never arrested for her crime, and soon, because of the hard work she had put in, she took over the company. After all, Maya got what she wanted, and all it cost her was seven years.